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To be upset DS did not get in academically selective nursery

(205 Posts)
Loletta Mon 26-Jan-15 21:14:20

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Metalguru Mon 26-Jan-15 21:16:20

This sounds like a horrible place, you and your ds are better off without it.

vestandknickers Mon 26-Jan-15 21:16:43

You are having a giraffe!

Why on earth would you want to send your son somewhere like that?


306235388 Mon 26-Jan-15 21:17:34

Jesus - 'not good enough' FFS have a word with yourself. He's 3, I wouldn't let either of my children within a mile of the place.

clairewitchproject Mon 26-Jan-15 21:17:42

Lucky escape there, who writes off a 3 year old?!

stealthsquiggle Mon 26-Jan-15 21:18:11

Bloody hell. Lucky escape, I would say (although I get that it hurts right now). As for what they could be looking for, I have no idea, sorry.

Unidentifieditem Mon 26-Jan-15 21:18:44

Highgate by any chance? Or one of the hampstead schools? I've written so many off due to this archaic bullshit. 3yo are infants not performing monkeys

IHeartChristmasMoomies Mon 26-Jan-15 21:19:33

I cannot find it in me to even begin to understand why you are upset.

Honestly, take a deep breath, look at your beautiful, loving son, and think about how you want him to be celebrated and enjoyed by his caregivers and not pushed relentlessly into academic achievements while he is such a small thing.

I mean this in the nicest possible way, I have a three year old. Do I want him to succeed academically - absolutely. Am I in any way bothered about this while he is still a toddler - no.

pointythings Mon 26-Jan-15 21:19:38

Yes, YABU to buy into the rat race at such a young age. Let children be children. Lots of children go to perfectly ordinary nurseries, or no nurseries at all, and end up doing very well academically - when they are old enough for that to be a relevant concern.

Willferrellisactuallykindahot Mon 26-Jan-15 21:20:28

Awwww no YANBU - I think its crap when we get told that our children are not actually the most amazing, bright, lovely people anyone has ever met!

But I agree with others, I don't think it sounds like a very nice place tbh, there must be a lot of pressure there if they are selecting them at 3.

greenfolder Mon 26-Jan-15 21:20:36

dont try and get it. seriously, you do not want to him to go somewhere like that- as he moves up the prep there will be increasing pressure to perform- how can you know whether that is for him?

incidentally, one of the brightest people i know barely said a word until he was nearly 4 and even now cannot produce legible writing.

educationrocks1 Mon 26-Jan-15 21:20:44

Give your ds lots of hugs and tell him he's wonderful. Never mind what the idiots are looking for smile

Rosieliveson Mon 26-Jan-15 21:21:03

I understand feeling sad. It's as if your child was judged and didn't come up to scratch.
Try to forget about it. Your DS is better off not being in an environment like that!

Loletta Mon 26-Jan-15 21:21:33

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Willferrellisactuallykindahot Mon 26-Jan-15 21:21:47

Oh and wear your flame retardant knickers because you are probably going to get a roasting!

fluffymouse Mon 26-Jan-15 21:22:14

Academically selective nursery is a ridiculous term.

What they are looking for is children who are easy to teach, it is nothing to do with how bright they are. Not that it could even be measured at this age.

listsandbudgets Mon 26-Jan-15 21:22:38

I think you had a lucky escape. Children don't need that level of pushiness at such an early age.

Find him a nursery that cares about him rather than results, nurtures them rather than hot houses them and play rather than formal learning.

Good luck

soverylucky Mon 26-Jan-15 21:23:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Willferrellisactuallykindahot Mon 26-Jan-15 21:25:23

"We have given his application careful consideration, but due to an exceptionally strong field of candidates I am very sorry to tell you that I am unable to offer him a place for.."

Yeah, ummm, you really don't want to be starting down this road when he is 3 years old. Try and forget about it and fine somewhere else. I bet in the end you will be very glad that he didn't get in! smile

hamptoncourt Mon 26-Jan-15 21:25:35

Academically selective nursery?


Get a grip.

Parsley1234 Mon 26-Jan-15 21:26:05

I hope this makes you feal better I remember one girl in my sons pre prep class who had been turned down from 7 selective nurseries in London ! They moved out of London to our prep school and tried again at year one she got in then. Or friends in LA who went to a fundraiser where their parental peer group were bidding 25k for parking outside the school or (same couple) who were told by the secretary that the principal really liked diamonds !! Wtf! I'm presuming you're in London ? I think london schools are really really competitive from what I understand and crazy ! How can anyone assess a child at 3 it is crazy !! if you are that concerned ask for a meeting with the head of the nursery ask if there is a wait list ? Ask how you can best support your child to gain entry ? Basically get a dialogue going with her also post in education to get the low down on what they do want is it one try only ? Good luck

Loletta Mon 26-Jan-15 21:26:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

morethanpotatoprints Mon 26-Jan-15 21:26:44

Do people really send their dc to selective nurseries?
How do they select? Seriously?

There is such a wide spectrum of development at this age, how can they know what they will be like in a fortnight, ludicrous.

OP, you said your child wasn't good enough. He most certainly is good enough, but not a fit for such a place.
You have had a narrow escape.

Willferrellisactuallykindahot Mon 26-Jan-15 21:27:41

I mean what the hell is it that makes a 3 year old a 'strong candidate'? I'm intrigued actually!

listsandbudgets Mon 26-Jan-15 21:27:59

"due to an exceptionally strong field of candidates" shock Those are the exact words that appeared in my rejection letter from Oxford! I went to a Russell Group uni instead and had a wonderful time.

There's hope yet OP grin

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