To tell my friend I don't want to look after her DC's anymore

[evmil]

I have a friend who has a full time job and quite unreliable childcare (she has aupairs but has quite a high turnover of them). She has three boys, one the same age as my DS(4) and two school age (7 and 10) and when her normal childcare falls through she asks me. Her aupair left just after christmas so since the start of term i have had her kids before school and after school Monday thru to Friday.

I looked after her kids for her yesterday as she said she needed to catch up on work. They were supposed to be here from 9 until 12ish but didn't leave until quarter past 7 last night. I was annoyed as I was supposed to be taking DSS3 somewhere but couldn't and he had to get a cab in the end and was late (DH is away so couldn't take him - i did tell her this).

Anyway, i got a text last night at about half 8 from said friend telling me she wasn't happy. I had apparently filled her kids up with junk food (we make milkshakes and biscuits and they got to try some and i sent some home with them), hadn't given them a proper dinner, they had jacket potatoes, which meant they were going to bed hungry, and I had let them play with the nerf guns and they had a go on the x-box (none of which she was happy with). She finished the text with 'i thought i could trust you to look after my boys'

I was really upset but just replied with 'perhaps it is best then if you get someone else to look after them', she didn't reply but i assumed this meant i wouldn't be having her kid anymore, but at quarter past 7 this morning she turned up at my house with them and said I'm not happy about yesterday but I am willing to give you another chance!! I didn't say anything as i didn't want to upset the boys but seriously!!

Like I said I enjoy having her kids and i know she is stuck for childcare but she doesn't pay me and i feel really under appreciated (i don't expect money, a thank you would be nice though!)

WIBU to tell her i don't want to look after her kids again because of her behaviour?

[ilovesooty]

For heaven's sake. Tell her to fuck off. She's beyond entitled.

[wheresthelight]

definitely tell her to jog on!!!

[SunnyBaudelaire]

cheeeky biatch, just say a big fat NO!
no wonder she is always having au pair and childcare problems really is it?

[DandyHighwayman]

Tell her today is the last day and your arrangement will stop forthwith.

Big girl pants time.

[DidoTheDodo]

She is not your friend. She is a user...and a very rude one at that. Tell her you won't be able to have her children any more, smile sweetly (through gritted teeth) and refuse to get drawn into any reasoning as to why not.

Just no! Not at all unreasonable.

[TiggerLillies]

Looking after her kids for free when she complains, yabu.
Refusing to? Yanbu.

[LurkingHusband]

Maybe you're seeing the reason for the "high turnover of au pairs" .

I do hope you appreciate the great time and trouble your friend has gone to to give you another chance ? Although I suspect somehow they won't think you do (no matter what you do).

[TiggyD]

Tell her to take the Fuck Train to Offsville!

[Quintanimo]

Ha ha ha - how did you keep a straight face???

[harryhausen]

Seriously?????!!!

What planet is she on?? I thought at least you were going to end your post by saying she paid you.

It's sounds to me like a normal days good food/parenting to me. Tell her to fuck off.

[McKayz]

Tell her to take a hike!! I would never look after her kids again.

[TengoSueno]

I had a friend like this. Needless to say we no longer speak. Some people have no idea how entitled they are.

[TheNumberfaker]

She has some cheek! Tell her she needs to get proper breakfast club/ after school care in place. The odd emergency is ok but she is using you!

[Nomama]

Oh please! Step off bitch, is your only response.

More politely, just tell her when she comes back for them that she will not continue to impose upon your friendship in this way.

Then 'No' on repeat!

[Rhiana1979]

The only thing you were unreasonable about is not making it clear to her last night that you wouldn't take the children this morning.

Use the old mumsnet saying

"This doesn't work for me anymore"
If that fails
"Fuck off to the far side of fuck and fuck off some more"

[impatienceisavirtue]

Wow. Yes, tell her to fuck off most definitely.

[Jessica85]

Not at all. You are doing her a favour and she's treating you like an employee. Her lack of childcare isn't your problem.

[MrsHathaway]

Fucking hell.

I think your text was very good. But I think you should send another: "I will not be looking after your children again. You need to find alternative arrangements immediately."

If she'd picked up her DC when she said she would (before lunch) then you wouldn't have fed them the "wrong" food anyway.

How are you friends with this user? She doesn't love you! She isn't giving you another chance, she just can't find another sap.

[LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett]

Her friendship is conditional on you looking after her kids. Say no and let the friendship go. You don't need an entitled user in your life.

[MrsHathaway]

she's treating you like an employee.

Apart from the noticeable lack of remuneration.

[SirChenjin]

This woman is not your friend - she is using you for free childcare.

Text her now and tell her that you are no longer able to look after her children as of now, then block her number. That is terrible behaviour from her

[VivienneRuns]

You took them? You should have closed the door in her face. Stop being such a doormat, find your spine and practice using 'no' until it's a natural reflex to people like her.

[Mrsteddyruxpin]

Are you really this naive and silly?

Tell her to fuck off. I hope this is a joke.

[Quitelikely]

Send her a polite text today stating that she needs to make alternative childcare arrangements as from tomorrow.

[Gawjushun]

Fill them up with coke and haribo today. When she comes to pick them up simply tell her you won't be babysitting ever again. If she turns up, don't answer the door.

Cheeky, cheeky cow.