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To be offended by dhs comment?

(57 Posts)
Kab13 Sat 10-Jan-15 22:56:21

Do I need to get a grip? I guess if this was a comment I would make infront of dh I wouldn't be offended.
We are up visiting his family, they are lovely but a bit out there and also a bit drunk.
Dhs cousin is here with his dp, she is also a really lovely girl and I get on with her well.
Dhs aunty was flicking through photos on her sons phone. (Dhs cousin) and dhs cousin said "oh mum don't there's probably sexy photos of dd on there" (jokingly)
Dh responds by saying "what?! If there is why didn't you tell me about this?!"
It hurt. Probably my own insecurity but it just did.
I've quietly removed myself saying I'm checking on dd, but I'm feeling just a tad inadequate.
Dh hasn't had that much to drink at all, is probably showing off etc but I can't work out whether I'm being petty.

Kab13 Sat 10-Jan-15 22:57:20

Just read that through, I probably am being unreasonable

123rd Sat 10-Jan-15 22:59:37

Sorry. I'm probably being thick...who owned the phone ..and who were the photos of?

HouseWhereNobodyLives Sat 10-Jan-15 23:00:15

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lemisscared Sat 10-Jan-15 23:00:21

Im a bit confused - whos DD? Why would your DH want to see them and why would it bother you? unless of course he was serious, then he is a freak

VanitasVanitatum Sat 10-Jan-15 23:01:11

I'm guessing you mean sexy photos of do not dd???

It wasn't a nice comment and he should apologise, is he normally a bit pervy/immature?

If not probably just an ill thought out off the cuff comment trying to be funny.

VanitasVanitatum Sat 10-Jan-15 23:01:33

*dp not dd

sharonthewaspandthewineywall Sat 10-Jan-15 23:02:03

I don't get it? Whose DD? How old?

purplewoofer Sat 10-Jan-15 23:02:52

I am guessing she means the photos were of the cousins wife.

RubbishRobotFromTheDawnOfTime Sat 10-Jan-15 23:03:11

I do hope you meant to type "sexy photos of DP" and not DD.

Assuming you did, I wouldn't be bothered by that comment. Possibly a bit crass but throwaway and not meant at all seriously. Can you imagine yourself ever making a similar joke about someone's boyfriend after a couple of drinks?

Wormatthebottomofthegarden Sat 10-Jan-15 23:03:26

I don't understand.

zozzij Sat 10-Jan-15 23:05:38

He sounds a bit embarrassing and pathetic to me.

MrsTawdry Sat 10-Jan-15 23:06:55

Your DHs cousin's Father said someting about sexy photos of her?

YANBU I would have gone mad.

zozzij Sat 10-Jan-15 23:07:06

OP's DH openly expressed excitement at the idea of viewing sexy pictures of his cousin's partner.

OP is saddened by this.

HouseWhereNobodyLives Sat 10-Jan-15 23:08:33

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MyTeethAreChattering Sat 10-Jan-15 23:08:34

"what?! If there is why didn't you tell me about this?!"

He said this about potential sexy photos of his cousin's girlfriend?

That's a bit off. The cousin and gf should be offended. Not you.

I'd be thinking, hang on, you and your mates show other dirty pictures of your partners? Well, you are certainly not getting any photos of me you perv. Actually, I'd have said that out loud at the time. At an absolute minimum I'd have shouted "Oi!" at the time.

Are you feeling insecure because you think he has shown photos of you to other people? Or because you think he is looking at photos of other women? Or because he was talking about looking at photos of other women in front of you?

He does seem to be acting a knob.

You seem to be reacting oddly by slinking off and feeling inadequate and insecure when it is him who has embarrassed himself.

Do you have self-esteem issues?

Mandatorymongoose Sat 10-Jan-15 23:10:40

Excellent summary zozzji

I don't think you should get to upset about it OP but I do understand why you felt a bit hurt.

Mandatorymongoose Sat 10-Jan-15 23:11:46


Koalafications Sat 10-Jan-15 23:12:26

I'm really hoping that there were some typos in your OP. Otherwise confused

Spinaroo Sat 10-Jan-15 23:13:20

I think he was probably just playing the fool- try not to get too worked up about it, there is nothing in it

lyspaere Sat 10-Jan-15 23:13:33

Disrwspectful to everybody. To his cousin's gf, to you, but it is himself he's shown up. I do hate when men announce their attraction to somwbody, as though that makes them interesting or something

Kab13 Sat 10-Jan-15 23:14:04

Sorry! Photos of cousins dp!!
Feeling insecure because I am insecure anyway but not helped by my dh expressing excitement about viewing photos of his cousins dp!

Kab13 Sat 10-Jan-15 23:15:10

I removed myself to compose as didn't want to comment infront of dhs family.

PrimalLass Sat 10-Jan-15 23:15:32

It was probably a joke. I think you are over reacting.

Koalafications Sat 10-Jan-15 23:16:37

Yes, that is very disrespectful. I couldn't imagine my DH doing that, if he did I would be quite hurt.

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