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AIBU?

To think this was an unreasonable bit of table hogging?

133 replies

Vycount · 09/01/2015 12:13

This is probably going to all end in tears.
Anyway, I've just been to a very popular local cafe with a friend and spent about an hour and a half stuffing my face on a brilliant brunch, more coffee, and then some cake. (Katie Hopkins eat yer heart out!).
It's a really busy place, you can't book tables.
When we got there a long table for 8 was occupied by a group of 6 women, some with babies. We were doing that sort of scanning for space thing and hoping someone was about to leave, so I could see that a couple of them had cups in front of them, others didn't. Luckily a space came free behind them so we got in.
They were still there when we left an hour and a half later. In that time they ordered no food or ore drinks drink, but hung on to their couple of cups whenever the staff came to look to clear the table. Meanwhile people were arriving and hovering about trying to find somewhere to sit to eat, asking to share tables etc.
Now on the one hand maybe the serving staff should have asked them if they'd finished and kind of moved them on. But on the other, it just seemed to me they were pretty entitle/rude/pretending to be oblivious. Bit unreasonable to use a cafe as basically a warm place to meet and jiggle babies do you think?

OP posts:

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slippermaiden · 09/01/2015 12:16

Yeah, I hate it when people really spread out and take over and you can't find anywhere to sit. I also find it annoying when people send their children to save a table while they queue for food, and I have food already but can't get a table!!

NickiFury · 09/01/2015 12:18

You sound like a right misery guts.

Behooven · 09/01/2015 12:19

YANBU
That kind of over-hogging drives me nuts. Like putting towels on sunbeds at 5am, I find it totally ignorant.

Vycount · 09/01/2015 12:19

I am NickiFury - were you one of the entitled bints table hogging for an hour and a half over two cold cups of coffee while people who actually wanted to eat at the cafe couldn't find a seat?

OP posts:

NickiFury · 09/01/2015 12:21

You don't know what they had before you arrived. It's freaking freezing outside at the moment, babies are hard work and they were probably enjoying the chance to spend some mutually supportive and chatty time together. If you went there once a week and they were doing it then yes have a moan but I can't believe people would get all puffed up about this.

onthematleavecountdown · 09/01/2015 12:21

YANBU, if you are not ordering, get out! How cheap, probably just wanted somewhere warm to meet up. Here's an idea - meet at one of the mums houses and take turns!

sebsmummy1 · 09/01/2015 12:22

To be honest I imagine this is a real problem with independent cafés. You don't want to piss off your regulars but you also need to keep new customers coming in and ordering or else you go out of business.

I imagine your damned if you do and damned if you don't.

NickiFury · 09/01/2015 12:23

"Bint" ?

What a lovely and imaginative word. Well done you.

No, not me, but it wouldn't have occurred to me to be moaning about a group of Mums and Babies being in the warm after a coffee either.

Vycount · 09/01/2015 12:24

I don't know what they had before they arrived. I do know however that no new items appeared on their table for the one and a half hours (!) that I was there stuffing myself, and they were showing no signs of packing up to go when I left.
It is a bit chilly today, maybe they it would have been a better idea to meet up at someone's house? Or maybe even somewhere that isn't always packed to the rafters with people wanting to enjoy the brilliant food on offer?

OP posts:

asmallandnoisymonkey · 09/01/2015 12:24

I love the word 'bint' and actually think it's rather apt in this context. Of course YANBU OP, table hoggers are the devil's own children.

Vycount · 09/01/2015 12:26

Ah... it's Mums and Babies... therefore normal consideration for others doesn't apply. Of course, I did realise that which is why I thought maybe this thread might end in tears.

OP posts:

MrsTawdry · 09/01/2015 12:28

YANBU there's a pub near me with a nice but small dining area. A group of about ten women with babies and toddlers regularly hog it...allow their DC to crawl about...they open the French windows in Summer so the kids can run in and out. They're NEVER eating!

NickiFury · 09/01/2015 12:29

Yes normal consideration does apply, from YOU also.

You got a seat, you had a meal and cake but still felt so annoyed by this you needed to post here on MN. I'm glad I have more going on that it wouldn't even occur to me get pissed off about something like this.

GenerationX2 · 09/01/2015 12:29

YANDU - this is very rude and inconsiderate. It's a business not a social club. It's hard enough as it is for a small local cafe to make ends meet they need to turn tables.

NickiFury · 09/01/2015 12:30

Should they stay at home then MrsTawdry? Presumably they're buying drinks or I am sure staff wouldn't allow them to stay.

MrsTawdry · 09/01/2015 12:32

Niki don't be silly. But they don't need to sit at a table for an hour and a half with ONE coffee! A cafe is not a playgroup! It's somewhere to eat, drink, chat....and if you're doing no eating or drinking, then bugger off to softplay.

MrsTawdry · 09/01/2015 12:32

Nicki Op said they bought no more drinks or food.

YoullLikeItNotaLot · 09/01/2015 12:32

I'm always very conscious of this in busy places and if I've finished eating & drinking, I go. I'd feel horribly rude if other people weren't able to sit and eat & drink while I sat there for 1.5 hrs with nothing.

Although from your post it seems that the staff did manage to find seats for everyone and no-one was actually turned away. So no harm done.

LuisSuarezTeeth · 09/01/2015 12:33

It's a bit naughty really if they didn't buy anything in all that time.

Run it past Nicki in future before you post though - check if it's sufficiently annoying

NickiFury · 09/01/2015 12:34

I'm talking about the pub you mentioned in YOUR post.

Well clearly I am in the minority but I just can't get irate about a group of women and small children enjoying spending some time together.

So I will leave you to your frothing .

Vycount · 09/01/2015 12:34

You see NickiFury (great name by the way!) I did indeed have a table, which was great. It just grated a bit to watch the procession of other customers arriving (including elderly on walking sticks if that sets the scene nicely), then wandering about looking for somewhere to sit, squeezing on to the end of other tables or leaving... while this bunch pretended they didn't notice. You'd honestly have had to be blind not to have seen what was going on.

OP posts:

MrsTawdry · 09/01/2015 12:35

Nicki no! The women in my pub have a soft drink each...they just sit, sprawled over the chairs and tables and let other people who want to iorder food ask them to move or eat in the not so nice bar area

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NickiFury · 09/01/2015 12:35

Why would she need to do that Luis?

I don't seek to change opinions, just offer mine, as we were all asked to do .

Cobain · 09/01/2015 12:35

I use to work in a community cafe and even with no staff overheads this behaviour closed us down. It was very sad as it was a lovely place for pensioners to have a cheap drink and socialise. A group of women preferred the cafe to going to a parent toddler group, spending the morning with 3 hot drinks and glasses of tap water and brought in food for toddlers. As a charity we where unable to say anything and just closed instead.

LuisSuarezTeeth · 09/01/2015 12:37

I was joking.

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