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To only take one of my children on holiday

(123 Posts)
Aloneandnowwhat Wed 07-Jan-15 19:55:17

So having been ripped off by my ex I have next to no money.
I am a single parent working full time and just wanted to take my kids (3.5 and 1.5) on a little holiday abroad this year.
Would I be a horrible mother to leave the 1.5yo with family and take the older one? To save on costs.
It doesn't feel right but youngest would never know and oldest would love it.

eosmum Wed 07-Jan-15 19:56:44

Stay home and take both?

Daveface Wed 07-Jan-15 19:56:46

I think YABU. Your youngest might not realise but your big one will know you left them behind.

Could you do a UK holiday with all of you instead?

ViolettaBridgettettette Wed 07-Jan-15 19:56:48

How has your ex ripped you off?

I'm on the fence.

What sort of holiday do you have in mind?

lunar1 Wed 07-Jan-15 19:58:49

Your youngest will know from pictures that they were left behind when they are older. I wouldn't do it.

QTPie Wed 07-Jan-15 20:00:06

When DSIL was 2 and DH was 4, DMIL took DH on holiday and left DSIL at home. Amazingly, DSIL is still very bitter 39 years on! However there may be more family dynamics at play than just one holiday... ;)

Could you do a holiday in the UK with both of them?

TheWomanTheyCallJayne Wed 07-Jan-15 20:00:15

I would if the younger one was happy being left. A stay with Granny or whoever is like a holiday anyway at that age as long as they're happy with that person.

PurpleStripedSock Wed 07-Jan-15 20:00:59

What sort of extra holiday costs will you have for a 1.5 year old? I don't get it.

LittleprincessinGOLDrocks Wed 07-Jan-15 20:01:25

The youngest may find out in the future though, by someone letting slip / seeing photos. How would you answer them when they asked why you left them behind?
I think I would opt for a cheaper holiday and take both (UK holiday, out of usual season etc) or stay home this year and save to go next year.

DamnBamboo Wed 07-Jan-15 20:02:20

Yes YWBVU.
Why would you even consider that?

ohmyactualgiddyaunt Wed 07-Jan-15 20:03:52

Yabu. Stay in the UK and take both. A 3.5 yo will enjoy a week at haven or butlins.

ghostspirit Wed 07-Jan-15 20:06:26

there might be a deal you can find where a child gos free? like someone else said maybe find a holiday in uk you can go to. your children wont care if its here or abroad. or maybe give yourself more time to save?

sleepingdragon Wed 07-Jan-15 20:06:46

The 9.50 sun holiday offer is on at the moment, and there are lots of sites where people are uploading the codes so you don't need to buy the sun or have been collecting them. I haven't been before but am planning to book one for this year. I have been told you need to be flexible with dates,its best to upgrade if you can afford it, and you get charged extra for things like towels and bedding so its cheaper to take your own. There are some European campsites to, eurocamp and that sort of thing, and loads of UK holiday camp holidays.

crapatmultitasking Wed 07-Jan-15 20:06:49

The 1.5 year old will go free (or almost) If you can why not take them both ? Its hard being a working mum,enjoy the sunshine and not having to worry about the day to day stuff,build sand castles,relax and splash in the pool .

Quitelikely Wed 07-Jan-15 20:07:11

Darling people will judge, they always do but I say go for it!!!!!

You won't actually be harming anyone so...............

BackforGood Wed 07-Jan-15 20:07:44

YWBVU.
Go away with them both, in this country.
Can't you imagine how hurt they would be when older, to realise what you'd done ?

Iggly Wed 07-Jan-15 20:08:23

Yabu. Why does it have to be abroad?

Either get a last minute deal or go in the uk. The 3.5 year old wouldn't really be fussed anyway!

SMOGY Wed 07-Jan-15 20:08:37

Honestly I wouldn't do it, but I also don't see that there is anything majorly wrong either. So what if they see pictures when they are older? You just say you were only little then so you had fun with gran. I doubt they'd be upset tbh. My friend recently took her five year old to Lapland and left her 9 month old behind, because she didn't know any different, and having her there would have limited what they could have done, when her lg is older they will take her too, really what are they missing out on??

As I said me wouldn't, just because of how I am, but I know plenty who do and can't see the harm. Especially as it would be hard to go on your own with two children that age.

needaholidaynow Wed 07-Jan-15 20:10:58

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheHermitCrab Wed 07-Jan-15 20:13:21

Take a holiday in this country, going abroad would only be for yourself with the children at that age anyway.

I don't mean to be rude but it surprises me how many people think you need to go abroad to have a holiday. My OH's family have 2 or 3 holidays a year but must have one. My OH gets a sulk on at the fact we have only had 2 holidays ever.

It's unfair your ex has affected this but spend the time in this country and have a nice break with both your children.

SnowWhiteAteTheApple Wed 07-Jan-15 20:13:27

Stay in the UK and take them both, unfair to exclude a child even if they are too young to know.

IsabeauMichelle Wed 07-Jan-15 20:14:32

Good lord. I can't believe how many people are saying YABU! Nothing wrong with this whatsoever. Blimey.

WinterShivers Wed 07-Jan-15 20:15:26

I don't actually think she is being unreasonable. "Aloneandnowwhat" do what you feel is best!

WinterShivers Wed 07-Jan-15 20:17:09

IsabeauMichelle Me neither, I'm sure she'll take the both of them on the next holiday smile

FreeWee Wed 07-Jan-15 20:17:42

Find a holiday you can take both on or not at all. I can't imagine not taking both my children (when the second arrives) on holiday together because it's a shared experience for them as siblings.

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