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Ds2 party

(8 Posts)
winkywinkola Sun 04-Jan-15 11:14:04

Had a lovely time yesterday.

A friend of mine called up on the day - 1 hour before - to say her ds wouldn't be coming as they'd been offered a free West End theatre ticket.

I am staggered. Or oversensitive?

PandasRock Sun 04-Jan-15 11:19:17

What was the party - a general village hall/party tea with entertainer (cost the same even without this one child), so one wasted party bag, or a pay-per-child trip somewhere expensive so lots of outlay which cannot be recouped?

It is a bit rude to accept a further invitation once you have accepted one, but West End theatre attendance is hardly an everyday event, is it?

Fault on both sides, imo (although friend gets brownie points for being honest, rather than faking d&v or just not turning up) - she was rude to accept a 'better offer', but you are being a bit over sensitive as turning down a free west end ticket would be silly.

Bowlersarm Sun 04-Jan-15 11:22:28

I think it's wrong too. If you accept an invitation then you stick with it, not pull out because a better offer comes along. I would never allow my childfen or my Dh and myself for that matter, to let people down.

YANBU.

TidyDancer Sun 04-Jan-15 11:31:52

Yanbu. Your friend was rude. But like PandasRock said, how rude depends on the cost of the child attending the party and also what show it was.

CheeseBuster Sun 04-Jan-15 11:35:57

As said above it depends hugely on the type of party. Bouncy castle in the garden with 30 kids then it's fine, 4 of them going to Thorpe park then it's not.
A theatre ticket could be worth £60 and there may be no chance of taking child to there if this wasn't free. I would understand if a friend cancelled on me for this type of "better offer" it's not as though they are going to a different party.

PandasRock Sun 04-Jan-15 11:52:49

I would understand if a friend cancelled for this reason too.

We are very comfortably off, but even so cannot afford west end trips very often. I can't take just one child - unfair on the others, plus no child care for them - but as a family it costs £200+ for decent tickets! plus train tickets and probably (given distance and timings) a meal out. It's bloody expensive.

This could be the child's only realistic chance of going to the theatre.

hoobypickypicky Sun 04-Jan-15 11:57:29

I would understand a cancellation for this reason and respect the parent for telling the truth rather than making up a story. West End theatre tickets aren't cheap and for some children will be a once only or once in a blue moon event whereas friends' parties occur quite frequently.

I can't see any reason to be offended here. You're being a bit oversensitive imo - your DS and his party is paramount in importance to you but not to anyone else.

PandasRock Sun 04-Jan-15 12:25:30

I see this situation where it is possible to feel more than one emotion. Sad (for ds2) that his friend didn't come to the party, but also very happy for the other child to have the opportunity of such a fab experience. Surely no genuine friend would want someone to miss a great opportunity?

And that is how I would explain it to my child, if they were upset.

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