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AIBU to declare this year as MY year.....

(13 Posts)
fabfiftyfox Sun 04-Jan-15 09:32:18

It's the big 50 for me this year, and I told my dh and kids that this is the year I put myself first.
Not is a selfish way, my little ones are both under 10, so I can't completely throw in the mothering towel.....
I feel I spent my 30's nurturing my marriage. My 40's nurturing my children. Now I think I would like to claim my 50's for myself. Well at least the first one anyway.
Nothing earth-shattering, just putting myself at the top of my things-to-do list, instead of last or more often than not never.
I know I'm not reeaally being unreasonable, just need the niggling doubts of guilt for abandoning my family to the wolves eased away....

notagainffffffffs Sun 04-Jan-15 09:35:36

You've lost me grin

Andrewofgg Sun 04-Jan-15 09:35:46

Go for it. As for big 50, well, you are of course a mere child . . .

paperlace Sun 04-Jan-15 09:47:05

I'm not sure how that works when you still have two primary school kids but ummm good luck

callamia Sun 04-Jan-15 09:54:52

What do you want to achieve/do this year? It's exciting to feel a world of potential in front of you - what will you do with it?

FunkyBoldRibena Sun 04-Jan-15 09:56:49

Yes of course, it will do them all good to start learning how to do things themselves as it sounds like you do it all.

However you can be nurturing and do things for yourself. You just have to find the way through.

fabfiftyfox Sun 04-Jan-15 09:59:10

As I said, nothing earth-shattering. I don't plan on moving into my own apartment or take a few weeks off to lay on a lovely beach somewhere ( both have crossed my mind though)
Going for a swim ALONE.
Having a nice walk ALONE
Take a nice long bubble bath ALONE (kids usually on the floor playing with toys)

inneedofsomeclarity Sun 04-Jan-15 09:59:36

Not at all u. I have officially named 2015 the year of me where I rediscover who I am, regain my confidence, my personality, my fun side following the break up of my marriage, which, as I unpick everything, I realise changed me in a negative sense. So go for it-set the world on fire and enjoy it.

callamia Sun 04-Jan-15 10:00:26

Do one of those things today - start as you mean to go on!

arlagirl Sun 04-Jan-15 10:04:40

God do it.

I'm divorcing so planning lots of things. I have always made sure I've had time to myself ever since dcs were babies.....would have gone mad otherwise.

Withershins Sun 04-Jan-15 12:08:40

DO IT! My birthday is in January, every year we do very little, everyone is broke/on a diet/sober/partied out etc, so in September I booked a week in New York, spending my birthday on top of the Empire State building this year.
I don't have small children but it doesn't mean you shouldn't do more to make yourself happy (obviously not making everyone else miserable at the same time).

fabfiftyfox Sun 04-Jan-15 12:27:40

I think because the children don't need me as much, I have more time on my hands and realize that I don't really know what to do with said time.
After I have done all I NEED to do I end up just pottering around actually looking for things to do.
I have started a couple of hobbies over the years and given up because of lack of time (and possibly guilt) I really need to think of some things I can really get my teeth into.
Maybe I will write that book, start crafting, join the gym..............

littleleftie Sun 04-Jan-15 12:49:30

Me too OP although my DC are teens.

I have gone off on a weeks holiday alone - it was bloody lovely! DC were fine with their father, why wouldn't they be.

Do you want to retrain for a career when DC are a bit older, anythig like that?

Make a list!!!!

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