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To tell SIL to keep dds gift at her place and dd can go an play when she wants?

(29 Posts)
Rosa Sat 03-Jan-15 20:39:28

We have a small flat and dds share a room.we have no extra storage garage, attic shed etc.Space is limited. No forseeable move. Dd 6 did her letter to FC and all large items Frozen castle and barbie villa were excluded as FC knows we only have a small house. ( list distributed to relations) Returning home from the UK today unwrapped in box and under the tree is a barbie dresser and stool set. We have Nowhere to put it . No free wall space in the bedroom. it can't stand in the middle as then they can't play . same with the lounge , kitchen and bathroom. Can't let her play and then store and get out as the box is so fucking big it won't go under her bed. Am so angry with SIL as dd wants to keep it ( and can't understand why Fc bought a big gift when we had said we had no space)but I don't know how. It can't go back as her name is written on the box in marker pen so thought SIl can have it in her living room and dd can go and play on demand when she wants ....( SIL is saying how good FC was in choosing the gift... They use the tradition that FC brings big gifts in Italy ). Stupid woman.

Garcia10 Sat 03-Jan-15 20:56:28

What a cow your SIL is. Imagine her buying your DD a Christmas present that doesn't fit in your flat. I suggest you go NC.

slithytove Sat 03-Jan-15 21:00:28

Seems fine to me. Keep at sils.

I have a similar first world problem.

We have no storage, and have bought the little tikes cosy coupe for DS birthday. When my grandad found out he bought him a battery powered ride on. Lovely thought, but Ds doesnt need 2 ride ons, and we intended to keep the coupe outside cos its plastic. Can't do that with this other one. Mum suggested keeping it under the dining table. angry

LingDiLong Sat 03-Jan-15 21:01:32

Oh dear. I can see why you're a bit miffed actually but I think asking if you can just keep it at SIL's house is really rude. Can you 'put it somewhere safe' until you can 'make a space' for it? i.e. hide it (in the car boot?!) until DD has forgotten about it...

Other than that I can only think to be really honest with DD and SIL - very grateful for the gift but we have nowhere to put it so we're going to have to sell it and buy a replacement of something smaller.

PrettyLittleMitty Sat 03-Jan-15 21:04:30

telling sil to keep the gift at her house seems a tad ungrateful imo. Surely a bit of re-arranging you could find somewhere to put it?

crumblebumblebee Sat 03-Jan-15 21:09:13

You sound really scathing of her.

waithorse Sat 03-Jan-15 21:10:37


bubalou Sat 03-Jan-15 21:19:41

Yanbu - I have had similar from my fucking MiL angry

She has bought in the past - AFTER being told not to .....

- drum kit
- keyboard
- scaletrix

And a whole other host of stupid or large pissing gifts that she only got to annoy me!

I'm always so considerate of buying gifts for people's kids - especially those with space limitations.

Make the sister keep it at hers.

esiotrot2015 Sat 03-Jan-15 21:26:18


ChocLover2015 Sat 03-Jan-15 21:32:08

Just keep it a few months til your Dd gets bored with it

thatwouldbeanecumenicalmatter Sat 03-Jan-15 21:38:34

Can the dresser be attached directly to a wall in DD bedroom without the legs and foregoing the stool? Maybe if the toy desk bit could be hinged so that it stores flat against the wall when not in use? Even above a radiator or above the foot of her bed?

Sorry, I know what it's like my parents and MIL do this even though they know we have increasingly little room, and it's laughable when I suggest mammoth toy they bought should stay at their house only to be met with "but we have no room!" Yes and I live in a tardis...

youarekiddingme Sat 03-Jan-15 21:40:32

I'd suggest putting it on her bed during day and getting it down when she wants to play with it. No problem where in room it's kept during night.

Was dresser on list?

imostlyreadandlurk Sat 03-Jan-15 21:43:17

YANBU, I'm in similar squeezed flat with no storage and fed up with MIL regularly buying stuff for DS when we've repeatedly asked her politely not to. He's only 1.5 so we get away with a one in/one out policy at the moment! If you've already had the conversation re space with your SIL and she bought it knowing it would be a problem it's totally reasonable to ask her to find the space. If you haven't haven't talked to her about it before though I think you should get rid of it creatively this time (maybe another family member can house it?)

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams Sat 03-Jan-15 21:55:35

I think SIL owes you a weekend babysitting. Drop the kids off with the barbie crap. Forget to take it home.

Is it at least badly made? Could you whack it (repeatedly) with the Hoover?

SaucyJack Sat 03-Jan-15 21:59:40

We have five in a two-bed and I think YABU. Put it next to your DD's bed or whatever.

Floggingmolly Sat 03-Jan-15 22:00:02

Why are you letting your dd believe it came from Santa??

MrsKoala Sat 03-Jan-15 22:07:24

i know exactly where you are coming from OP. We have recently moved from a tiny flat. i mean TINY. We operated a 'just in time' policy for stuff. I hated people giving ds clothes 'which he would grow into'. NONONONO. keep it at your house till it fits him! He had 2 drawers out of a chest of 4 drawers for his stuff and it wasn't being kept full with clothes he wouldn't fit in for another year!

It's very easy to give these things when you just don't understand small living spaces. People would laugh and say 'i know, we have just got SO much stuff too' ERRRR no, you live in a 3 bedroom house, you don't know the meaning of 'no room' - I can only buy 4 fucking bog rolls at a time.

bubalou Sat 03-Jan-15 22:34:29

Oh the clothes thing!

Sound so ungrateful but yet again my fucking MIL was renowned for this and bought DS an aged 4 coat when he was 1.5!!!!! confusedconfusedconfusedconfused

freemanbatch Sat 03-Jan-15 22:45:04

my kids have just started seeing their dad again after 18 month no contact (waiting for a judge to make an order after children's services recommended no contact) and I offered Christmas eve and Christmas day contact as I thought that would be a good thing for the kids but also so they'd 'do presents' at daddy's instead of him sending stuff here BUT he sent everything home after it was opened!! three car boots full of stuff have come home over the holiday and now I can't see my floor!!

people just don't think sometimes and using the santa thing to get away with it is really annoying!

youareallbonkers Sun 04-Jan-15 00:12:15

Why does your daughter think gifts from family are from fc? Children should know who bought them stuff imo

CadleCrap Sun 04-Jan-15 05:12:29

Why does your daughter think gifts from family are from fc? Children should know who bought them stuff imo

In the OP
They use the tradition that FC brings the big gifts in Italy

Rosa Sun 04-Jan-15 07:27:33

Sorry went to bed as have been travelling since 4 am.
Try to answer a couple of things. My family gives gifts ( from them ) and stockings come from FC. DH family put big gifts from FC . My and DH gifts are from us and they know it.
No it wasn't on her list.
The bedroom has 2 big windows wth a Trofast that goes between and underneath. Then there are 2 beds and a fitted wardrobe . I reckon it needs about 60 cam wide to rest against. her bed is next to the door and next to her bed is the dolls cot- which gets played with regularly.
car boot - Our car is located 30 mins from our house so not practical to get to.
We have underfloor heating so no radiators.
SIL knows perfectly well as we have been trying without success to purchase a storage space near us to store cases/ bags / xmas stuff to free up space in the flat.
I am still angry as its not fair on DD and yes I am scathing of SIL .

saoirse31 Sun 04-Jan-15 08:45:17

tbh I can see it's difficult re space but think you sound horrible about sil. to be fair she maybe saw present she thought your dd would love- so it annoys you but still, are you not happy your dd has relatives who love her?

agree with poster re putting it on or under bed bed during day ubless being played with.

don't ruin a lovely present on your dd.

MaryWestmacott Sun 04-Jan-15 08:56:24

Ask SIL if it can stay at her house as you've nowhere to put it. Also, your dd is young enough to need you to read the gift tags, this gift isn't from Father Christmas, you were mixed up, it's from aunty xxxx and wasn't that lovely. Can dd think where to put it or shall we ask aunty xxxx if it can go to her house?

Honestly, it's rude to just but something because you want to give it with no thought about the recipient, including of they have house room for it.

fuzzpig Sun 04-Jan-15 08:58:37

If you keep it, it'll likely get tripped over several times and it'll break. Problem solved grin

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