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about wanting to go back to bed for an hour

(6 Posts)
2boysandcounting1 Sat 03-Jan-15 09:10:16

I don't know whether I'm being to sensitive but I have a 7 week old baby and breastfeeding so have been sleeping downstairs on the settle with baby in moses as I don't want him waking my other 2 children in the night.

My husband comes down occasionally to do the odd nappy change if he hears him but majority of the time stays in bed.

My argument is he is coming down each morning when he doesn't have work at 8.30 and even when he is working in the afternoon it's the same time. I have had quite a lot of unsettled nights with baby as he is poorly with a cold and bad cough so this morning when he come down I said I was going back to bed for an hour and he moaned. He said I knew he wanted to clean the car but I said to him why not get up an hour earlier so I can have a lie in to instead of him getting up late and wanting to go straight out.

Also another issue is his weekend work he sometimes get the choice of shifts and when he does he chooses lates. I asked him if he does get a choice could he do earliest as evenings are difficult at the moment as baby is cluster feeding and I'm trying to get the other 2 to bed aged 2 and 4. I'm aware he sometimes doesn't have a choice and that is different but now he is saying I'm trying to dictate what he works but I'm not meaning it to sound like that. Am I out of order here?

Snappynewyear Sat 03-Jan-15 09:12:38

Not in the slightest. He is being a selfish pig sad

PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange Sat 03-Jan-15 09:15:32

No you are not.

DH needs to step up and look after his children so his wife can get vital sleep.

Tvseemstobemyhobby Sat 03-Jan-15 09:17:13

Before he goes to bed tonight say "don't worry about coming down to do nappy changes, you get a really good sleep In the comfy bed and I'll need you to come down at 6 to allow me a couple of hours in bed"
Do not make it a question.

If he doesn't do it then take Moses basket and yourself up to bed the next night. My youngest is a noisy bugger and never wakes the 4 year old up so you could well be martyring yourself (and your back on a sofa) for nothing. However your youngest will undoubtedly disturb Daddy grin You're obviously doing it because you've developed a bad back not to show him how easy he's had it - honest guv!

lifeissweet Sat 03-Jan-15 09:18:52

YANBU. Was he like this when the other two were babies? Is he this selfish in other ways?

It isn't fair. The baby is his too and you need some sleep.

2boysandcounting1 Sat 03-Jan-15 09:32:06

I found my second quite stressful sleep wise but ended up co sleeping which helped. If I just had that opportunity to just have a lie in in the morning now and again it would be fine. What gets me more is he complains he is tired. I just look at him and say if you are tired then what am I?

He does do chores in the house but I have to say he is terrible at compromise and if he gets something in his head to do then that's it regardless of what night I have had. I told him I don't have an issue with him doing the car, it's the getting up at the last minute that gets me after a full night sleep where I have had broken sleep if that makes sense.

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