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Bloody husband and the bloody window

(30 Posts)
Esmeismyhero Fri 02-Jan-15 18:54:49

So my bedroom window is very large and looks out to a two way street that is used a lot. My husband has no body issues at all and is forever undressing totally naked in front of the window.

It's driving me crazy as everyone can see in and his response is "its my house, I can be naked where I like. People shouldn't be looking in".

Dh is nearly 7 foot and is well endowed so it's not like people are not going to see, even from a distance. I've got curtains, a blackout blind and patterned voiles up at the window but he never uses them.

I just feel sorry for the motorists and people walking who can see in and possibly losing their breakfast because of his display of hairy man beast.

Aibu to tell him to SHUT THE BLOODY CURTAINS? muttering under breath

Esmeismyhero Fri 02-Jan-15 19:08:38

Well for the record I don't think I abu

Snappynewyear Fri 02-Jan-15 19:11:20

The dreaded net curtains (quite dense ones) are kept permanently closed over the window. Would these do.

LaurieFairyCake Fri 02-Jan-15 19:11:48

If you could provide the address I will happily organise a coach trip

Depending on attractiveness of manhood we can offer two options for shouting through window:

1. Put it away love


2. Phwoarggghhhhhhh

fluffyraggies Fri 02-Jan-15 19:12:35

''patterned voiles up at the window but he never uses them''

Are they not permanently across the window then? The voile. Or is he flinging them open as well as the curtains?

Stillyummy Fri 02-Jan-15 19:13:08

How about some nets? I know they arn't to everyone's taste but it may save your neibours lol.

Though... I did once get smashed on codine (it was prescribed but I appear to be a lightwate) and open the door to the postman topless. I took the package (not an innuendo) and signed for it before I shut the door and saw myself in the mirror. Wanted to die.

Stillyummy Fri 02-Jan-15 19:13:40

So I am not in the position to judge/advise!!

MrsTawdry Fri 02-Jan-15 19:14:03

He sounds as though he's enjoying it. could he be a flasher? Why don't you fit some of those awful voile things?

Stillyummy Fri 02-Jan-15 19:14:38

Just realised what a voile is blush

fluffyraggies Fri 02-Jan-15 19:15:08

mrs she has got voiles smile

HowCanIMissYouIfYouWontGoAway Fri 02-Jan-15 19:15:14

Get a friend to phone up claiming to be the police following up a call about someone flashing out of the window. grin

but seriously yes, get nets.

When you say in front of, do you mean in the room with the curtains open or do you mean face forward, todger touching the glass ?

GooodMythicalMorning Fri 02-Jan-15 19:15:56

Voiles are still pretty see through with the light on though.

Esmeismyhero Fri 02-Jan-15 19:17:39

This is my window, voiles are always closed but at night people can still see in.

I don't think he's a flasher but he most defo not body conscious lmao.

laurie defo a put it away love

pluCaChange Fri 02-Jan-15 19:20:28

You need frosted window film (!

Or would he rip it off with his teeth further terrifying passersby and mortifying you?

Esmeismyhero Fri 02-Jan-15 19:21:00

If he was pressing his Winkie up against the glass I wouldn't be very impressed I hate smudges on windows

No he just undresses, walks around the room naked with the light on and doesn't give a shit.

I know I would hate to accidentally glance up and see some random blokes giant sausage flapping around :/

pluCaChange Fri 02-Jan-15 19:22:19

Oooh, x-posted with the brilliant:

"todger against the glass" and

"could he be a flasher?"


HowCanIMissYouIfYouWontGoAway Fri 02-Jan-15 19:24:42

download this and play it at full volume every time he gets changed in there grin

ArsenicFaceCream Fri 02-Jan-15 19:25:24

Coach trip would work

Esmeismyhero Fri 02-Jan-15 19:33:39

I'm giggling at the music

fuctifino Fri 02-Jan-15 19:36:50

Is that a stealth boast, 'giant sausage' wink

ThePrincessButtercup Fri 02-Jan-15 19:38:43

Hate the stealth boast about the "giant sausage". wink

ScrumpyBetty Fri 02-Jan-15 19:40:33

Can I come on the coach trip too lauriefairiecakes

Esmeismyhero Fri 02-Jan-15 19:41:11

Is genuinely wasn't a boast lol, can see why some would be hmm

Bakeoffcakes Fri 02-Jan-15 19:42:59

Could you get a friend with a strong stomach, to be waiting outside tomorrow night. When she sees him in his full glory, she could start laughing and pointing very loudly.

capsium Fri 02-Jan-15 19:47:31

I remember my mother telling me one of her neighbours got a warning for this by the police. Not worth risking IMO.

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