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AIBU to detest the phrase "mansplain";?

(135 Posts)
greyhoundgymnastics Fri 02-Jan-15 18:32:04

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bair Fri 02-Jan-15 18:34:16

I've seen it done on forums. A discussion, with everyone having their say and one poster, posting over and over as if brute force is enough.

I've never seen a woman do it IRL either. Only men. I reckon it's a socialisation thing.

Bluestocking Fri 02-Jan-15 18:35:32

I love the word and the concept of mansplaining. My understanding of it is slightly different though - I think it's men explaining things to women who actually already understand those things as well as, or better than, the women they are talking to. See Rebecca Solnit's Men Explain Things To Me.

ThePinkOcelot Fri 02-Jan-15 18:36:00

Never heard of it and I like to read. What does it mean?

greyhoundgymnastics Fri 02-Jan-15 18:37:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DrDre Fri 02-Jan-15 18:37:47

I agree. Hate it.

greyhoundgymnastics Fri 02-Jan-15 18:38:06

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greyhoundgymnastics Fri 02-Jan-15 18:39:01

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Bair Fri 02-Jan-15 18:40:46

That's my understanding too Blue.

You can explain why you understand something and why you want to do X, but they will repeat over and over no no, do Y and then ignore your reasons and give you their own. Over and fucking over.

I work in joinery. Surround by men all day. Most are lovely, some are mansplainers. Used to work in an office, never saw a woman do it.

TravelinColour Fri 02-Jan-15 18:41:44

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greyhoundgymnastics Fri 02-Jan-15 18:43:46

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Birdsgottafly Fri 02-Jan-15 18:44:18

There is a common way that sexist men try to tell a woman she's wrong, or needs clarification on a subject she's knows better, I think Mansplain, is perfect,

Women are capable (as are Men) of being patronising, but I've never come across a Woman who does the equivalent of Mansplaining.

What's worse, is when your on your late 40's (as I am) and a Male will try this twenty years + younger than me.

Younger men speak to older women in a way that a younger women to older man wouldn't contemplate.

Bluestocking Fri 02-Jan-15 18:47:28

"Womansplain" would be a reasonable way of describing the phenomenon of women persistently and unstoppably explaining things that men already understand to men. But since this is not actually a phenomenon that exists (at least not in the world most of us live in) we don't need the word womansplain.

TravelinColour Fri 02-Jan-15 18:48:04

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greyhoundgymnastics Fri 02-Jan-15 18:48:37

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Birdsgottafly Fri 02-Jan-15 18:48:42

If your not encountering "Male entitlement" attitudes, daily, your lucky, but many of us still are.

I'm in Liverpool, I used to love the "Scouse Bird" sayings on FB, but over the last few months, they have got increasingly sexist around female sexual behaviour.

Take an interest and you can see that Feminism is still making very slow progress and there is a backlash to keep it that way.

SconeRhymesWithGone Fri 02-Jan-15 18:48:57

What's worse, is when your on your late 40's (as I am) and a Male will try this twenty years + younger than me.

Try being in your sixties; then you sometimes get the added benefit of their speaking more slowly and using simpler vocabulary, just to make sure you understand.

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett Fri 02-Jan-15 18:50:08

I think, like anything, it can be used to silence another point of view! and I don't like to see it used in that way. But also it does describe a particular phenomenon of men talking down to women, which isn't quite covered by patronising, usually because the man wouldn't explain it in the same way to another man.

So I think it's a useful word to have.

And let's look at some of the words used to describe women's conversations:
Bitch fest
Nag
Moan
A coven cackling
Bitter

Which make mansplain look positively sweet in comparison....

HappyGoLuckyGirl Fri 02-Jan-15 18:51:02

<dumb emoticon>

What's mansplaining? confused

GinAndSonic Fri 02-Jan-15 18:51:05

The thing is, men do this all the time. They enter a conversation that women are having and start explaining to these women the very thing they are speaking about. Its patronising and it should be called out.
Actually, men just explain everything to women. As if women could never join a conversation without being given a cheat sheet first.
When i asked my dad if he had an elbow bend knocking about in the shed, i got him telling me what an elbow bend is. I know what it is, thats why im asking for one, because i need it.
But if i explain something to him im apparently being sarcastic and talking to him like hes a kid. hmm

Birdsgottafly Fri 02-Jan-15 18:51:21

Grey, I don't like the Feminist board, I don't post because they gang up on different opinions.

I don't like the way many want to tell other women how they should think etc, so I agree with you.

But I have been Mansplained at throughout my life, possibly not helped by me being 5 foot 2, blonde and feminine looking, they think they can get away with it.

Birdsgottafly Fri 02-Jan-15 18:53:32

Actually, scrap my last post, I'm victim blaming myself!

These Arseholes do it to anyone without a Penis.

slightlyglitterstained Fri 02-Jan-15 18:58:03

Mansplain is a tremendously useful concept. It cuts right to the heart of so many assumptions.

YABU to desire that everybody stop using a perfectly valid term simply because you've seen it used by some people to be rude. Any term can be used to shut down conversation.

As for "there isn't an equivalent term for women" - well, erm. Yeah. That's kinda the point.

Quangle Fri 02-Jan-15 18:58:33

It's two men explaining what having an amnio is like. To me. I've had two hmm

I simply don't hear women do the equivalent to men. That's why the word is useful.

CaptainHolt Fri 02-Jan-15 19:00:55

I think mansplain is used sometimes to shut down a debate, but so is calling people out for being racist/sexist/femminazis etc.

It doesn't mean mansplaining, as a phenomena, doesn't exist.

mansplaining isn't an argument that men make to discredit feminism, it's subtle, patronising, pointless explanations about anything.

If you want to understand it better you should read the book - that you wrote.

And all that 'right hand down' bollocks. I've never seen a man being given an impromptu driving lesson by stranger in a car park.

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