Just that really, she keeps making comments about us using condoms or 'putting a sock on it' whenever she leaves the house these are her parting words to us, I got vair vair drunk last night and she text me this morning asking if we'd used a condom, she bought DP condoms as part of his Christmas present and found it hilarious Now we're quite an open family but honestly it's getting weird, I generally do the "mum you're not allowed to talk about sex" and laugh it off but the text this morning just was odd I lost a baby in September so I can't help but feel hurt that she's being oddly keen for me to not get pregnant again, like she doesn't like my kids and wouldn't have loved that baby (dramatic I know) but really why else would she do this? What do I do? If anything?
Are you 17?! There is NO reason why your mum should be involved on your sex life in this way, it's weird and intrusive. I bet you don't make comments about her sex life! I would drop the smile from your face and tell her, next time, 'mum, just drop it now, it's weird and makes me feel uncomfortable.'
Minty you have no idea how involved in my life she is? I haven't mentioned how often I see her or speak to her and I have already said that I find these comments odd, obviously implying they're not a normal/regular type of conversation for us What a strange thing to say
Yeah, that's weird. I'd talk to a teenage child about condoms, but not an adult who already has kids. The Freudian in me thinks she's probably envious of your sex life - or at least, what she imagines your sex life to be. I agree that you should tell her to back off - you're old enough to be fully responsible for your sexuality and contraception, without her help or intervention.
I think she sees how much losing the baby in September hurt you and wants to protects you from further hurt!
This is still not appropriate but sometimes seeing the good intentions behind things people do and say makes them easier to deal with! I am not saying you should allow it to continue but knowing this may make it easier to talk to her firmly but nicely and get her to stop!
I lost a baby in September so I can't help but feel hurt that she's being oddly keen for me to not get pregnant again
This is your answer. Sit her down for a chat when you're own your own and both in a gentle mood, and ask her to tell you how she feels about it. It's your life and your body, absolutely - but it can be almost unbearable to see your child suffer. She's going about it all wrong, but she's just afraid for you.
Armani I nearly choked on my tea! Actually thinking about what you've all said I think it probably is that she doesn't want to see me in the state I was in this summer, I had HG with the pregnancy was in hospital 4 times with it, then lost the baby at 11 weeks and had to have an operation to remove it. It was the worst few months of my life and yes she was there for a lot of it I never really even thought about how traumatic it must have been for her But yeah it really must have been This makes me much less annoyed and weirded out by her behaviour thanks guys, I think I'll just make it clear that we are in no rush and I absolutely couldn't face another pregnancy yet myself so she needn't worry, hopefully she'll stop then ...although Armani's idea is very tempting