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AIBU?

AIBU to worry about friends' kid a little

8 replies

NCdAgain · 24/12/2014 01:23

NCd regular on here.

Friend goes fell running/ walking a lot, and takes her 18mo kid out when walking, in a baby backpack thing. She was saying that she'd recently done a half marathon with the 1yo on her back - running - and that the baby had loved it (this sounds plausible - kid totally loves the backpack from what I've seen).

Apparently at the end she was accosted by a physio who glared at her and passive-aggressively asked the baby "so, how's your neck feeling?".

The physio sounds like they need to get some people skills, as that's not really the way to address a concern about the baby's welfare - it's just going to get the mother's back up. Particularly when the mother is known for being both highly intelligent and independent-minded, and when the baby is clearly totally happy at the end of the race.

However, I'd worry more about giving the kid mild concussion. 21km is quite a long way to go, gently bouncing the kid around - even if the kid has the muscular control to not get to flopped around at the beginning, by the end, the kid would be quite tired.

AIBU to say something (gently, politely) if this interfering-physio story comes up again in conversation?

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NCdAgain · 24/12/2014 01:24

sorry - the kid is between 1yo and 18mo. Editing failure above, obviously

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AlfAlf · 24/12/2014 01:37

I'm with the physio on this. I can just picture the baby's head crashing about whilst the mum runs for miles and miles.
I think maybe your friend could get someone to film her running with the baby on so she can see how it looks?

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NCdAgain · 24/12/2014 01:43

OK - good suggestion - filming as an evidence base might be acceptable to the mum.

Difficult one because she is one of the most stunningly intelligent people I have ever met, but her academic field really doesn't include anything to do with biology, so there are many things she just hasn't thought of (like necks and concussion), and she does focus on details rather than the big picture, and she does lack people skills to an extent. She knows she isn't stupid (and so do the rest of us), but she lacks enough perspective to appreciate that stupidity and ignorance can look the same, sometimes.

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Birdsgottafly · 24/12/2014 01:57

Being intelligent doesn't mean that you'll take expert opinion/knowledge on board when it comes to infant development.

There are lots of people who end up with permanent injuries because their sports but parents allowed them to take part in activities not recommended for their age, or over exercised.

It isn't recommended that you jog with a child under two in a baby carrier.

Your friend could be causing health problems that include the eyes/brain as well as the muscles.

She may not like telling, but that the situation, other people (especially qualified professionals)don't like to see children put at risk.

She may be the parent, but she doesn't have the right to expose her child to unnecessary health risks, because of her hobbies.

Walking is fine, jogging isn't.

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Adarajames · 24/12/2014 02:21

I'd also be worried and would tackle her in as gentle but forceful way as needed to get it through to her. Videoing a great idea, we used that a lot in my sports science degree, showed all sorts of stresses sports persons didn't realuse until view back; it is very likely causing issues for the child, if not directly, certainly possible issues in future

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NCdAgain · 24/12/2014 02:34

OK, thanks for the confirmation. Will try to broach it as a matter of urgency.

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Taystee · 24/12/2014 02:39

I'm sure I read somewhere that you shouldn't even jog with an infant in a normal pushchair; it should be a proper jogging pushchair so I can only imagine how bad jogging with a carrier could be.

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Plateofcrumbs · 24/12/2014 04:50

I did a bit of research before buying a running specific pushchair and I use a baby carrier a lot - and running a half marathon with a baby in a carrier at that age does sound alarming. In other respects I take my hat off to her, but I would definitely be worried about the impact on the child.

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