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to think that buying an investment property without telling your spouse,

(15 Posts)
whatnow2 Sat 20-Dec-14 00:24:09

keeping it secret and then lying to their face about where you are going when you start using the premises, is an outright betrayal?

Has this happened to you or do you know of somebody to whom it has happened?

But the question is, what do I do now?

SorchaN Sat 20-Dec-14 00:42:18

I don't know anyone who has been in this situation, but yes, I would consider it a betrayal if I were left in the dark about major financial dealings on the part of my partner.

I'm not a lawyer, but I'd take the view that technically you own half of it...

Apatite1 Sat 20-Dec-14 00:48:10

Gah, I'd be livid. And wonder what else he was hiding.

I wish I had sage advice, but I'm stuck at livid.

mrsfuzzy Sat 20-Dec-14 02:08:46

bang out of order, i'd wonder what else they were hiding from me.

StarbuckGalactica Sat 20-Dec-14 02:16:36

shock I'd be furious!

StarbuckGalactica Sat 20-Dec-14 02:17:47

shock have they told you about it yet or are they still trying to keep it from you?

whatnow2 Sat 20-Dec-14 02:48:54

He hasn't told me about it. He lied outright to me today when I now realise he was there. Also the other day I think.

A few months ago I found the legal document relating to this property (which I had known nothing about) and when I asked him about it directly he said that he had been going to buy it but had backed out. Following my suspicions today I put two and two together and looked up the property on the land registry. Sure enough, he owns it.

I can't sleep sad.

whatnow2 Sat 20-Dec-14 02:57:48

I don't understand how long he thinks he can keep this a secret now that he seems to be actively using the premises.

dwarfrabbit Sat 20-Dec-14 03:02:10

using the premises for what? this sounds beyond weird. no wonder you can't sleep...

Flambola Sat 20-Dec-14 03:08:06

Do you feel comfortable confronting him about it? I'm not surprised you can't sleep.

whatnow2 Sat 20-Dec-14 03:15:04

As a workshop to make futons in for the moment. Don't know what other plans he has for it (obviously - am surprised I even know what I know).

Also started a thread about this in relationships. I know that is probably not the done thing but really wanted other people's opinions.

No am not really comfortable confronting him. Don't know what I should do however.

steff13 Sat 20-Dec-14 03:42:54

So, it's a business? He's selling futons? You're not being unreasonable; I'd see it as a betrayal as well. Why are you uncomfortable confronting him? Do you have any idea why he would keep this a secret?

whatnow2 Sat 20-Dec-14 03:57:57

I think it's because he bought it at the same time as buying half of another property (which I do know about) which I was open about not thinking was a good idea. At the time he probably knew I would be upset and wouldn't agree.

We have also had quite a few rocky patches over the past couple of years, so it may be a way of hiding assets.

Am now thinking he may be developing the premises to some extent as well (it'sa leasehold shop and basement).

Contempt for me just about sums it up.

Bulbasaur Sat 20-Dec-14 04:25:49

He bought a property behind your back..to make futons?? Are they really that profitable? confused

Is this his typical line of work to do something like this? Or are these futons a brand new thing completely?

I guess what I'm asking is, are you sure he's selling futons instead of "selling futons"?

tracyrobo Sat 20-Dec-14 05:14:55

YANBU but you need to talk to him about this. I see that he might not want to tell you about it if he thought you would be unsupportive but he can't lie to your face and hide things from you. Do you really want to be in this relationship?

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