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To be laughing (almost) uncontrollably at the Gaston song?

(39 Posts)
StockingFullOfCoal Fri 19-Dec-14 13:10:03

I've let DDs open one of their presents early - they're both poorly with a cough/cold.

Anyway, its Beauty and the Beast, they've not seen it before, I haven't seen it since I was around 10.

Gaston is such an arsehole! The whole song, they're all singing about these "qualities" that make him such a desirable man hmm and all I can think is "dickhead, bigger dickhead, even bigger dickhead" each time they come up with new reasons why he is so brilliant.

As for the "every last inch of me is covered with hair" I actually spat my tea out grin My best friend is also pissing herself laughing.

jeee Fri 19-Dec-14 13:12:55

Yeah, but in the lynch mob scene at the end he's genuinely scary.

And now I'm singing.... "No-one's quick as Gaston, no-one's slick as Gaston, no-one's neck is incredibly thick as Gaston."

ARGHtoAHHH Fri 19-Dec-14 13:13:25

I am in love with Gaston.

He's roughly the size of a barge, y'know.

Nabootique Fri 19-Dec-14 13:13:55

"As a specimen yes I'm intiiiiiiimidating!"

PlummyBrummy Fri 19-Dec-14 13:14:28

He's especially good at expeeeectorating.

ARGHtoAHHH Fri 19-Dec-14 13:15:31

That swell cleft in his chin is to die for


educationrocks1 Fri 19-Dec-14 13:17:09

No one's neck is as thick as Gaston's! need I say more.

Nelehwelly Fri 19-Dec-14 13:17:38

'I use antlers in all of my decorating ...' grin

educationrocks1 Fri 19-Dec-14 13:19:45

Oh I missed this one, In a wrestling match nobody bites like Gaston <<swoon>>

DoctorDonnaNoble Fri 19-Dec-14 13:20:38

One of my favourite Disney songs!

GrouchyKiwi Fri 19-Dec-14 13:22:28

But don't forget that no one goes stomping around wearing boots like Gaston. That absolutely makes him more desirable.

StockingFullOfCoal Fri 19-Dec-14 13:22:42

grin My eldest DD who is 6 has just said "I'm going out of the room, I don't want to look at Gaston, he's an idiot."

Oh God I can't stop laughing, what was I thinking marrying DH when he doesn't decorate using antlers, have a cleft chin, spit at people, fight with them, bully them, bribe them nor have a neck as thick as a major oak tree trunk. I've made a massive mistake haven't I?!

Gawjushun Fri 19-Dec-14 13:23:08

I'd do Gaston any day over post-transformation Beast. Bleugh.

Miggsie Fri 19-Dec-14 13:23:25

The way Belle is obviously revolted is great too - I think even the horse thinks he's crap as well

educationrocks1 Fri 19-Dec-14 13:23:37

Especially when you also consider, "nobody, fights, bites and hits like Gaston" what a prince!

girlywhirly Fri 19-Dec-14 13:23:45

Not in the song, but he does say of women "when they start reading books, and thinking...." and other blokes murmur agreement! I used to love it!

MinnieM1 Fri 19-Dec-14 13:25:03

Me too GawjusHun the Beast looks like a girl, Gastons a prick but he'd definitely get it

BitOutOfPractice Fri 19-Dec-14 13:25:17

I love it when Belle says "Why Gaston, you are positively primeval!" and he answers "Why thank you Belle!"

I love B and the B. The songs are FABULOUS! And the heroine has a lot more get up and go than most Disney princesses. My DD1 was obsessed with aged 3 or 4

Hemlock2013 Fri 19-Dec-14 13:27:02

So uncanny that I'm watching that very scene with dd as I open mumsnet??

He uses antlers in all of his decorating too!

squoosh Fri 19-Dec-14 13:27:30

Oh I adore Gaston! 'the hair over every inch of my body' line always makes me giggle.

I generally hate Disney songs but that one gets my seal of approval.

LuannDelaney Fri 19-Dec-14 13:27:53

Maybe your dh should start eating dozens of eggs everyday? I love that song. And film.

StockingFullOfCoal Fri 19-Dec-14 13:28:32

Belle was my favourite as a child, I thought the most romantic thing I'd ever seen was when the Beast gives her the Library. <swoon>

Gaston would get it if he could shut his vile mouth for more than a second but I imagine he'd either be into BDSM or the sex would be beyond boring cos yer know, he doesn't seem to actually like women very much.

DD was very shock "Why is Beast dead? I thought Disney always had a happy ending?" then burst into tears! Cheered up when the magic started happening but said to me deadpan when he'd transformed "Oh. I didn't think he'd look like that. He looks like Hercules, yack."

I think he's one of the hotter Disney Princes.

GrouchyKiwi Fri 19-Dec-14 13:30:18

10 points for Gaston!

0 points for human Beast. He is not hot.

It's my favourite Disney film after Hercules.

CountryPheasant Fri 19-Dec-14 13:33:22

I always thought that was part of the 'joke' of the song though; that all of the qualities mentioned are questionable/dubious.

He's a bit like a stereotypical jock character I would say. Total knobhead but is known as an alpha male to all the blokes in the village because of his athleticism/ hunting prowress and the stereotypical ditsy women all fancy him.

PumpkinsMummy Fri 19-Dec-14 13:33:28

I love the film for that song. Very ahead of it's time really how Belle rejects the traditional "provider" and hunk for the soft hearted but ugly one. It is an hilarious song, I do like a man covered in hair.

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