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children have received a cash gift but different amounts based on age

(45 Posts)
twoopsie Fri 19-Dec-14 08:53:22

I've received a card from a family member with a 10 cheque with instructions to give it to my four dc.

Lovley supprise, and very kind.

However she's said to give 4 to eldest, 3 next eldest then 2 then 1 to youngest.

Aibu to just split it evenly or spend it all together on something when we are out?

She's in her 90s, but I really don't understand this logic. Can anyone explain it?

Wiifitmama Fri 19-Dec-14 08:55:39

We get this all the time with relatives. My mum did it the other day too. I have three boys of varying ages. I don't mind it and neither do the kids. They are just happy to get money. Maybes this a generational Thing?

Ohfourfoxache Fri 19-Dec-14 08:56:08

Ach just split it equally and be done with it. Very kind of her but it seems a bit confused

CountingThePennies Fri 19-Dec-14 08:56:20

I would bank the cheques and split the money evenly.

I wouldnt tell her though.

Jodie1982 Fri 19-Dec-14 08:56:25

Maybe buy a Game for them all to share? Or a DVD?

18yearstooold Fri 19-Dec-14 08:57:21

Personally I would spend it on a treat for them all and say it was from aunt dot

Bowlersarm Fri 19-Dec-14 09:01:30

I would do exactly as she wishes. It's her kind present and I think you should respect that.

If you explain it to the younger ones that their proportion will increase as they get older they hopefully will understand the strange ideas the older generation have.

twoopsie Fri 19-Dec-14 09:01:47

Wii I think it is a generation thing. Just don't understand it at all. Will end up getting something to share I think

twoopsie Fri 19-Dec-14 09:02:44

If you explain it to the younger ones that their proportion will increase as they get older they hopefully will understand the strange ideas the older generation have.

But it won't go up, younger one will always be younger

beachyhead Fri 19-Dec-14 09:03:10

I was the youngest of three and various relatives used to do this. My mum ignored them saying it wasn't my fault I was born last smile just divide it equally!

Bowlersarm Fri 19-Dec-14 09:09:58

Although I have this in reverse as my eldest ds is aged 18 now and one relative has sent a cheque to the others but not him, presumably as he is now officially an adult. I am contemplating giving him the same amount so he doesn't feel left out!

DaisyFlowerChain Fri 19-Dec-14 09:12:01

I'd just buy a family dvd and some sweets and make an event of it.

It's unfair but many parents don't spend equal amounts on their own children at Christmas or through the year so it's obviously not unusual.

weegiemum Fri 19-Dec-14 09:15:47

Fil always sends an "age" cheque for birthdays and Christmas (when he bloody remembers!). So this year ds got £12 for his birthday and £12 for Christmas, where dd1 got £14 and dd2 £11 (but he forgot her birthday - dh paid £11 in anyway).

Fudgeface123 Fri 19-Dec-14 09:18:31

Sorry, £10 between 4 children?

thatstoast Fri 19-Dec-14 09:21:29

£10 between 4? That's just adorable. I don't think logic applies when you're in your 90s but she's taken the time to think about you which is the main thing.

Spending it on a DVD you'll all enjoy sounds like a good plan.

ghostspirit Fri 19-Dec-14 09:22:09

i agree with daisy. i recon a nice family dvd would be great. few nibbles under the duvet on sofa with the kids and watch a nice family film smile

I dont spend same amount on my 4 children. youngest is 4 oldest is 17. for the 4 year old i buy a mix of new and 2nd hand so i can get away with spending less money but still get reasonable amount. the 17 year old has more spent on her but less items. i try and make sure the 3 younger kids have about the same amount of presents to open. but they dont have to cost the same.

OriginalGreenGiant Fri 19-Dec-14 09:23:15

If you have a 15 year old and a two year old, and the money was just to spend (not to put into a savings account) I can see why someone would give a bit more to the 15 year old.

Smaller gaps and I think the amount should be equal - mine are 4 and 6 and ds2 would be bristling with indignation if ds1 was given more than him.

Splitting £10 between 4 though - ridiculous to portion it up. Buy them a pizza to share or a DVD or put it towards a family outing.

moonrocket Fri 19-Dec-14 09:23:23

10 pounds is a real sacrifice for many 90 yo! Have some compassion.

R4roger Fri 19-Dec-14 09:23:50

doesnt sound too unreasonable to me.
i would probably buy a family present.

Kaekae Fri 19-Dec-14 09:24:15

My grandmother used to do this when we were little. She would sometimes even put an IOU in the card and she wasn't short of cash either!! That was odd! I would put the money together and buy a board game for them so they have something to play with together.

Madmum24 Fri 19-Dec-14 09:25:33

How sweet :-) Buy some sweets and a DVD and remember her fondly.

canweseethebunnies Fri 19-Dec-14 09:25:35

My step dad's parents used to do the same as weegie's FIL, which was ok. They've stopped now as some if us are in our 30s!

I think it's such a small amount of money, you should just buy them something to share as you can't really buy much for £1 these days can you?

Fudgeface123 Fri 19-Dec-14 09:26:53

Sorry, I apologise I didn't see the bit about her being 90 blush I really should read posts properly

NanooCov Fri 19-Dec-14 09:27:08

My grandma used to do this and thinking back this is how pocket money for me and my sister worked - 10p extra a week for each year of age or some such.

To be honest with a £10 gift between 4 the only realistic thing you can do is buy a family pressie it it'll just go on sweets!

R4roger Fri 19-Dec-14 09:28:37

i dont know how old your children are though.
would she know if you didnt go with her wishes?

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