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AIBU to expect a reply?

(4 Posts)
InThisTogether Thu 18-Dec-14 08:31:12

This is not a big deal (not losing sleep over this!) but wondered whether MN'ers had any opinion on this and whether I can go ahead and assume a reply.

I am getting married next September (very small, very low-key) and have been starting to get organised by asking / assigning roles to friends and family. My DP is having his two best friends as best men and I couldn't decide between my group of four closest female friends who should be witnesses (we're not having bridesmaids, page boys etc and my best friend is giving me away).

Both DP and I hit upon the idea that it would be nice to ask his best men's wives to be our two witnesses. We both thought it would be lovely as it would give them a priority role without too much to do, and I liked that we would have two women to do it.

I am quite crafty and spent a while hand making two cards that said 'Will you be our witness?' to give to the two wives. I gave them both the cards (along with a handmade one for the wife #1 that congratulated her and DH on their pregnancy announcement) and heard from wife #2 in a facebook message that she would be 'honoured' and was delighted to be asked. This was a month ago and I haven't heard anything from wife #1 or her husband at all.

As I say, I am not sad or concerned (we will be spending New Year with them so can ask then) but wondered, is it usual to reply, or can I assume? Can't keep up at all with wedding conventions!

GingerbreadPudding Thu 18-Dec-14 08:51:03

You should expect a reply but we got married this heat, very small wedding and I ended up chasing, repeatedly, loads of people we'd invited. Oddly, it was the older generation who were most useless at replying (and the ones I was least fussed about being there). I think people just assume it's a yes but it's worth asking - could you let us know so there's time to invite other people if you're not?

NanooCov Thu 18-Dec-14 09:04:57

Given it's not until September and they're seeing you at NY, perhaps they felt there was no rush? And maybe they have other things on their mind with the pregnancy? Bear in mind too that if they have their baby with them (which I'm guessing they will) they may be thinking ahead to the logistics of passing said baby between them as they each fulfil their best man and witness duties on the day.

hoppus Thu 18-Dec-14 09:06:33

Maybe she's fretting about it and unsure as she will have a newborn? A month is a long time though I would have expected a reply by now

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