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To think DP is being a bit out of order regarding his son and ex wife?

(41 Posts)
9o700 Tue 16-Dec-14 19:38:07

His eldest son has said he wants a playstation 4 for christmas. He already has a PS3. His mum has said she doesn't think he should get one as the games are too expensive and he's best off sticking with the ps3 he already has.

DP has now taken it upon himself to say that dss should definitely get a ps4 and if she can't get him one, he should give his christmas money to dp so he can go and get him one. He even stood on the doorstep debating this with his ex saying if she gives him the money he'll go and buy the son one. This led to her saying defensively "no I'll get him one!" But she obviously totally backed into a corner with this and I feel it's a bit unfair. I have told DP he should leave it alone and let her sort her own christmas presents out, he disagrees and says he's doing the best thing by his son but isn't that like saying his mother isn't??

I don't know why, I just feel a bit angry about it. One of the reasons she divorced him was that he was controlling with the kids.

Waltermittythesequel Tue 16-Dec-14 19:41:04

He sounds like a prick!

Why are you with someone who is controlling? No matter who he's controlling.

Would you want him acting like this with your dc should you have any together?

InSpaceNooneCanHearYouScream Tue 16-Dec-14 19:42:06

You're right- he shouldn't be undermining her like that. Completely out of order.

WhyYouGottaBeSoRude Tue 16-Dec-14 19:42:18

Eugh! What a knob! If he really wants the child to have it he should pay for it himself!

Take note of how he treats her. It's a glimpse into your future if you and he should split.

TrendStopper Tue 16-Dec-14 19:43:15

He wants to get his son a ps4 for his christmas but wants his ex wife to pay for it. What a catch he is.

Finola1step Tue 16-Dec-14 19:43:48

He's giving you a crystal ball moment. Look hard.

TaliZorahVasNormandy Tue 16-Dec-14 19:45:27

Was just about to say what Finola did. Think long and hard OP. Long and hard.

NeedsAsockamnesty Tue 16-Dec-14 19:46:25

So he has turned up at his ex's doorstep demanding she gives him money so he can go and buy a ps4.

That's quite odd surely if he was that keen on getting one for him he should buy it himself

Boomtownsurprise Tue 16-Dec-14 19:46:30

Aaah he's a Disney dad. You will have this every social celebration.

It's all about the ex. The kid? Not so much. Sorry, but that's tit for tat /control / etc not what child wants or needs.

But you knew that. Sorry op. That's a drama set to roll on years fsad

9o700 Tue 16-Dec-14 19:47:22

We can't afford to buy him one. He has this habit of saying that his ex doesn't bother with the Kidd, doesn't understand them, doesn't understand technology, doesn't do the best thing by the kids etc.

The other day in the car he just blurted out "oh the poor lads, it's so bloody quiet for them at their house, she doesn't bother with them" confused it's just mad. I just wish he'd back off. We will never be able to have kids together, good job really because I think he'd be a nightmare!

VodkaJelly Tue 16-Dec-14 19:48:00

So who is going to buy the games which are a lot more expensive? Your DP? or will he harras his ex into buying more?

VanitasVanitatum Tue 16-Dec-14 19:48:12

have you told him what you think? Would he listen? You're absolutely right, if he can't see that if say it's a big red flag.

tumbletumble Tue 16-Dec-14 19:49:09

YANBU. I feel really sorry for his ex - he must be a nightmare to co-parent with.

9o700 Tue 16-Dec-14 19:50:28

And then last night "well I should be having DSS on his birthday as it's my weekend - that's unless she puts it into his head that he shouldn't". (Nothing to do with the fact that the poor lad is approaching 20 then and might have better plans than spending birthday with dad?! hmm

carabos Tue 16-Dec-14 19:51:01

Does he have a trick pelvis? If not, can't see why you would bother with him.

WhyYouGottaBeSoRude Tue 16-Dec-14 19:51:20

I have to ask OP- why are you with him? He isnt a nice person. Just because you dont have children doesnt mean its ok to be with someone like that.

9o700 Tue 16-Dec-14 19:51:56

Yes I've told him, he flies off the handle saying only he has his kids best interests at heart so it's understandable that I don't understand.

OldIrving Tue 16-Dec-14 19:53:25

is his ex single? TBH she sounds like better prospect. Your DP sounds like a right ignorant self-righteous plonk.

What are his good points???

WhyYouGottaBeSoRude Tue 16-Dec-14 19:53:26

Hang on! This is a 20 year old son? Not a child? Why the hell is he even going near his exwife then? They have nothing to discuss- he is going out of his way to antagonise her. Hes an arsehole.

NeedsAsockamnesty Tue 16-Dec-14 19:54:29

I think he's the one that doesn't understand

OldIrving Tue 16-Dec-14 19:54:31

20?! Missed that. Seems like this bloke is seeking a reason to stay involved in ex's life.

9o700 Tue 16-Dec-14 19:54:41

No the ps4 is for the younger son (16)

9o700 Tue 16-Dec-14 19:55:56

He also has a learning disability so can't come and go independently. Sorry not drip feeding, just doing a million things at once

WhyYouGottaBeSoRude Tue 16-Dec-14 19:56:38

At 16 the child can get into his dad's car without dad even getting out of it. There is no need for this man to be kn her doorstep dictating what SHE should spend her own money on.

WhyYouGottaBeSoRude Tue 16-Dec-14 19:57:31

Xpost. Does he need assisted from the house to car?

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