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To be upset?

(20 Posts)
HomewardBound2014 Tue 16-Dec-14 18:17:52

When people who know me and dp are a same sex couple write Mr and Mrs on the envelope when they send us a christmas card instead of Mrs and Mrs.

bozo14 Tue 16-Dec-14 18:21:39

Omg YANBU. Thats sooo rude. I wouldnt dream of sending my cousins a mr and mrs card when they are mrs and mrs. Why would someone do that!?!

Zippidydoodah Tue 16-Dec-14 18:22:23

That's bizarre! I might write "the joneses" if for some unknown reason I didn't want to write mrs and mrs! Can't think why I wouldn't though.

aurorasky Tue 16-Dec-14 18:27:06

I don't know about you but I kind of go into auto pilot mode when writing out lots of Christmas cards. Genuine mistake perhaps??

Nomama Tue 16-Dec-14 18:28:39

I use first names unless I know they are married.

SIL is not married, so SIL and Partner, but colleague is, Mrs and Mrs Double Barrelled, as that is their choice!

Why would anyone that wrong for you?

HomewardBound2014 Tue 16-Dec-14 22:56:15

We have been together for 6 years soI was hoping people would remember by now that we are both female and not male and female.

SqueezyCheeseWeasel Tue 16-Dec-14 22:58:30

That's really weird of them. Why not just write "Jane and Mary" (or whatever your names are)? If they are that offended by your same sex coupling why the heck are they sending you festive wishes in the first place?! People are bizarre.

WorraLiberty Tue 16-Dec-14 23:04:24

Right, yes.

SqueezyCheeseWeasel Tue 16-Dec-14 23:05:54

Unless one the card is from an acquaintance type person and one of you has a gender neutral name? I can see how it might come about then, e.g. If I were writing a card (one of about 200) to a work colleague & only knew their partner as "Alex", I would probably assume (rightly or wrongly but more from a probability PoV) that "Alex" was the hetero partner of the colleague. That said, I wouldn't refer to their title or marital status in the card or address anyway, so it's a moot point, but other folks more traditional in the envelope addressing arena might inadvertantly fall foul of it.

So basically IMO, excusable from an acquaintance but not from proper friends who know you.

WrigleysBum Tue 16-Dec-14 23:18:52

What Worra said.

HomewardBound2014 Tue 16-Dec-14 23:23:39

It's not inside the card they write it it's on the envelope. Most of them are from my family in South Africa or dp's family from the isle of Skye. So i know they know we are a same sex couple.

TeenageMutantNinjaTurtle Wed 17-Dec-14 07:03:43

are they trying to be funny/ironic do you think? I literally have no idea why else someone would to this.

HomewardBound2014 Thu 18-Dec-14 18:18:17

If they are trying to be funny its not.

londonrach Thu 18-Dec-14 19:18:44

Got a friend whos in a same sex relationship (no married) i put (not real names) betty and joan no surname. I dont know her girlfriend very well as only meet her twice but my friend ive know very well for over 11 years. I also have the problem where my 'Aunt' of 20 plus years isnt married to my uncle. Again i put betty and fred (again not real names). Been doing that for 20 years plus and they dont seem to mind.

CalleighDoodle Thu 18-Dec-14 19:22:26

For married couple i just write The Jones' on envelopes.

biggles50 Thu 18-Dec-14 23:17:52

So easy to write ms jane smith & ms joan bloggs.

HomewardBound2014 Fri 19-Dec-14 18:59:56

I don't know why they don't write what Biggles would write.

TheCowThatLaughs Fri 19-Dec-14 19:11:07

Maybe they've got some kind of bizarre idea about not letting the postman know you're a same sex couple? A misplaced way of protecting your privacy? Or they don't realise that it's not abig deal in the UK?

Poseypops Fri 19-Dec-14 19:22:02

I thought I had it bad because people write mr & mrs DP on ours but we are not married - it offends me and I always think FFS do you remember attending a wedding? But I'm miffed on your behalf about your cards! Sorry people are so insensitive op.

HomewardBound2014 Sun 21-Dec-14 14:48:58

Thanks you Posey. TheCow some of the cards are from the UK.

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