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To be a bit upset at my mum? Weight related.

(91 Posts)
MikeTheShite Thu 11-Dec-14 12:59:36

She's just told me I look like Gemma Collins hmm
I'm a size 16.
Used to be a 6,3 Years ago.

I'm actually so upset

LittleRedRidingHoodie Thu 11-Dec-14 13:02:36

Well. Gemma Collins does do well out of it. Maybe time to get dieting. Size 16 isn't so healthy. Sorry.

cariad34 Thu 11-Dec-14 13:04:11

It entirely depends on your build and height as to whether a size 16 is healthy or not. Regardless, be happy in your own skin.

AimlesslyPurposeful Thu 11-Dec-14 13:13:38

I think Gemma Collins looks ok. She certainly makes the best if what she's got.

I do think we have to be honest about people being overweight though. I used to be fourteen stone but had no idea how big I really was. I went from being a size 14 to a 16 and it just kept going up. It was only when someone bought me a jumper for Christmas that was the size of a duvet cover with sleeves and I tried it on as a 'joke' expecting it to swamp me but it fitted that I realised that my weight was a bigger problem than I thought and did something about it.

Being a size 16 just isn't healthy. I know there are medical reasons for some people to be overweight (Gained a couple of stone when I was on steroids for a year so I do understand) but if you're overeating and not getting a sensible amount of exercise it might be time to think about making some changes.

If what your mum said upset you then ask her not to talk about your weight again.

Beanie99 Thu 11-Dec-14 13:18:25

Is there any particular reason that you have gone up so many sizes in 3 years? Medication or pregnancy or something?

Meechimoo Thu 11-Dec-14 13:18:33

That was really insensitive of your Mum. Size 16 is usually on the overweight side of cuddly but we all know when we need to lose a few pounds don't we? We certainly don't need it pointing out to us! I'm a 14 and could do with being about a stone or so lighter, but in don't need to be told this!

goodasitgets Thu 11-Dec-14 13:18:38

You can't tell someone's health from a dress size hmm

CountingThePennies Thu 11-Dec-14 13:18:49

I dont think gemma collins is massive, you wouldnt do a double take at her in the street because of her size.

netty7070 Thu 11-Dec-14 13:18:53

Isn't the issue that the OP's mum said something deliberately (I'm assuming?) hurtful to her?

magpieginglebells Thu 11-Dec-14 13:20:10

Was she trying to politely tell you that you'd put on weight? Some people are in denial so she might be trying to be subtle?

raltheraffe Thu 11-Dec-14 13:23:08

The comment only upset you because deep down you are unhappy with your weight. If you were fat and happy, as I believe some people can be, it would not have bothered you.

I have put on 6 stone due to medication and I am trying to sort it out. Not so much for cosmetic reasons, because I feel sluggish and get out of breath easily. It is not healthy, sort it out!

Meechimoo Thu 11-Dec-14 13:23:29

Magpie, I think the op is fully aware of her weight gain and doesn't need to have it pointed out to her!

SnowSpot Thu 11-Dec-14 13:23:52

Do you look like Gemma Collins? (I had no idea who she was until I Googled her). She looks very pretty to me and makes good use of her body, she looks like a Rubens model.

I guess you need to ask yourself why you'd be upset by being compared to her. Do you think she is unattractive, and if so, why? Your mum hasn't said you are a bad clothing size - you took that from her comment. I think this is more about how you feel about your weight gain over the past three years and that you are (I guess) not happy about it.

MikeTheShite Thu 11-Dec-14 13:24:52

My mum is normally lovely,
I'm 5ft 7 also.

I'm on a notorious weight gain anti depression.

My story is I used to ride ten racehorses a day and be a size 6, after an unexpected pregnancy (6 months before I knew) my partner dumped me, I had to leave me job and home and return to the family home.
I now have my own home. I don't eat very much or plan meals.
My DD is now 2.5 and my exp is still with the woman he left me for.

It hurts like hell and I'm coming through the other side. I love my life and I'm at uni.

It upsets me I don't look how I used to look.
I was trying to embrace my size as riding full time from 16, I've never known what my true natural body size is.

I was 7st 11. I daren't check now.

I've just cancelled my rsvps to all my Xmas dos

5EllipticGoldRings Thu 11-Dec-14 13:26:13

In my experience Mums have a strange idea of weight, mine constantly comments on my weight and says I will be getting fat as I'm experimenting with sweets as gifts for Christmas. I'm a size 12 and do spin, hydrospin, Pilates and cycling, I also look after a 1.75 acre garden.
I've tried to stop taking any notice of my mum but I know how hurtful it can be.

MikeTheShite Thu 11-Dec-14 13:26:15

I really really thank you all for being honest!grin

Beanie99 Thu 11-Dec-14 13:26:26

Gemma Collins maybe overweight but she is quite attractive. Perhaps your Mum thought that comparing you to Gemma would make you feel better about yourself, rather than just saying that you have put weight on.

goodasitgets Thu 11-Dec-14 13:27:26

It depends I think. I'm ok with my weight. But when my mum makes comments that I wouldn't make to my worst enemy, of course it's upsetting so I can see why OP is upset
(I say ok with my weight as I have an eating disorder after years of the crap from her, however I am a size 16 and perfectly healthy)

OHolyShite Thu 11-Dec-14 13:27:45

I'm guessing she didn't mean it as a compliment. Tbh I don't see how anyone could.

What you weigh is none of her business. But she may be genuinely concerned for you. Being that size (GC looks much bigger than a 16 to me) isn't healthy.

My mum used to say similar to me (handed me a photo and suggested I use it as my 'before' photo when I had expressed no unhappiness about my weight). Now I can see that she was acting out of concern. Albeit in a very cack-handed manner.

In the past few years I have completely taken control of my diet and lifestyle and now maintain a healthy weight and BMI.

I wasn't happy being fat and, if I'm honest, struggle to see how anyone pucan be.

All that said, her comments are useless if you don't want to change.

raltheraffe Thu 11-Dec-14 13:28:16

What med are you on?

Mitirzapine can be a pain for the weight.

I take serohell for bipolar and it is a bloody nightmare for weight gain

thursday Thu 11-Dec-14 13:28:35

6 to 16 is a big change in a short space of time. It's always a tricky one. I put on 5 stone in a year once and no one said a word to me or asked it I was ok. But then someone saying 'you're fat you know' doesn't help either generally. Do you think she was trying to be caring in a tactless way? I think you can tell when people are just being a dick to you because fatty jokes are still acceptable to most.

MikeTheShite Thu 11-Dec-14 13:29:24

Ralth- it is indeed bloody mirtazipine confused

youllshootyoureyeout Thu 11-Dec-14 13:31:06

Sorry, but the idea that you can tell whether a person is unhealthy by their weight or clothing size is absolute rubbish. BMI is hugely outdated and was not meant to be used in the way it is today. Health At Every Size outlines why our current ideas around weight and health are incorrect and used generally to help the diet industry make it's millions. If diets worked Weight Watchers and the like would be out of business by now.

I am a size 16, I don't overeat, I exercise regularly and I am not having a take away every day. I can walk long distances without getting breathless or knackered, my blood pressure is good, no Dr has ever told me to lose weight (and no that isn't just luck. OP, please don't take any notice of your mum or some of the posters on this thread. Eat healthily and find a form exercise you enjoy and be happy in your own skin.

SnowSpot Thu 11-Dec-14 13:31:32

Poor you, it sounds like you have a lot going on there and way too many changes in a short space of time. Uni, medication, new baby, crapbag partner - all of that is understandable as to why you're not feeling at your best.
Unless you could say what tone your mum said the comment in, (jokey, admiring, etc) it's hard to know how 'bitchy' it was. But it does sound like you're not the one happy about your weight and that you're perhaps missing the exercise of riding? Are you able to go back to that at all? (Your life sounds quite jam packed though!)

AlleyCat11 Thu 11-Dec-14 13:31:33

Nothing like the Mother truth serum... She's just saying what she sees.

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