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AIBU?

to feel bloody battered and bruised and had enough

7 replies

oldguygirl · 09/12/2014 11:29

I just feel like we are bouncing from one disaster to another and just feel completely sick to death.
Year started with my DH out of work due to 2nd redundancy in a year.
Mum has been ill for some time- getting worse and looks like a Parkinsons diagnosis is imminant- they live 1 1/2hr away making it hard for me to get there when I have a fulltime job and a young DS.
Dnephew has serious mental health probs - sectioned twice, homeless, but admittedly getting on his feet a bit now.
Being bullied at work - have an investigation this week about it but dont feel completely reassured by this as experience tells me that it may not make any difference.
Now DH's brother has been found dead in horrible circumstances - awful in instelf but has opened up a massive can of worms also.

I have been suffering panic attacks and anxiety and have been trying to deal with this but at the moment just want to go home and hide in a corner.

I know people have much worse but seriously - there is a limit!!!!!

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EduCated · 09/12/2014 11:34

Oh my goodness, I have absolutely nothing wise or helpful to say, but how one person can deal with all of that and remain coherent is a bloody marvel.

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HellonHeels · 09/12/2014 11:37

I'm so sorry you've had a pile up of awful things happening. It sounds utterly overwhelming.

I know this sounds a little cold but can you prioritise the things to worry about? Think about you first - unless you are well and feeling OK you cannot support anyone else -

What support can you access for your work bullying and investigation? Union? Staff rep? Telephone support line for your work (some companies have external help or support services)?

Can you see your GP for help, support, counselling referral, medication?

After that - DH - does he have a job now? Can he access help and support for his family circumstances?

Your mum - do you have family living closer to her than you? Phone and email support may be all you can offer on daily/weekly basis for time being.

Your nephew - can you step back on this a little and let his parents support him? I know it is hugely worrying.

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GrannyGoggles · 09/12/2014 11:58

Flowers and Brew. Sometimes life just keeps chucking shit at you. Think Heels' advice is excellent, you do need to take care of you in among it all. Have a (frowned on) hug. I hope the things, like work, that can be sorted start to be soon, and that you can begin to see your way through. The possible Parkinson's diagnosis is tough, my father had it, but there is a lot of support there for your Mum.

Sorry you're having it so tough.

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oldguygirl · 09/12/2014 12:31

Thanks all.
Plenty of shit coming our way anyway!
Yes think me and DH seriously need to look after ourselves at the moment- this is definately one of my problems that I dont do this and actually let myself be treated as a bit of a doormat in some ways.
I work in a caring job and when I did take off sick this has resulted in the bullying (not from management but from residents (I work with older people).
I have already decided that if I dont get a good outcome from the meeting on Thursday I will be making my way to see my GP.

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Whatsthewhatsthebody · 09/12/2014 15:46

Omg yes you know I can identify with you. Things are quiet and fairly stable for years and then it seems life balls you shit crisis after shit crisis. Poor poor you.

Hellon has great advice.

Just sending you Flowers and hugs because we have had the worst last 5 years of our lives too and things are getting better do hope that's soon the case for you too.

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londonrach · 09/12/2014 16:11

5 years ago i could have written what you written too. Why does anything come at the same time. Agree with what hellon has written. You need to look after yourself to so deal with the problems you can, even if its asking for help and let others deal with those you cant. Now looking back i cant believe we got through it but we did. Some of the problems resolved themselves (mum got through breast cancer, dh got another job - three times) and looking back some wont that important just final straws. Makes you appreciate every day. Please talk to friends and your dh. Really sorry things are tough at the moment and im sorry about your dbil and dnew and dmum. Hugs and Flowers

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sparechange · 09/12/2014 16:21

OP, you are dealing with more than most people have to in 10 years, and it is no surprise you would feel overwhelmed.
Nothing constructive to add, but just wanted to say you are doing an amazing job keeping everything going with all this going on Flowers

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