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To be FUMING about the state of my sons shoes

(73 Posts)
Snaveanator Sun 07-Dec-14 19:28:48

A few weeks ago my DP took my DS (his DSS) out with him. DS is 5. They came back with a new pair of Nike trainers each, DS's cost £45.

My son went off to his dads for the weekend so I packed his bag and sent him off wearing his trainers. When they returned today, I was unpacking the bag and found the trainers stuffed in a carrier bag absolutely CAKED in mud.

AIBU to be mad about this? They are literly a 5 minute drive down the road and if he intended to take him somewhere muddy, surely he could have text me for some wellies, I could have dropped them over or left them out mine for him to collect. Failing that he could have popped into a charity shop to buy some cheap shoes or wellies for him? He could have at least cleaned them!

My DP works really hard and likes to spoil us, I know it's a lot of money to spend on 1 pair of trainers but surely the ex could have treated these with a bit more respect?

Coconutty Sun 07-Dec-14 19:30:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NeedsAsockamnesty Sun 07-Dec-14 19:31:13

Simple solution you cease to provide any clothing or footwear for contact give ex advance notice so he knows to bring stuff

DaisyFlowerChain Sun 07-Dec-14 19:31:21

They are children and clothes are meant for wearing. Pop them in the washer, no harm done.

Pippidoeswhatshewants Sun 07-Dec-14 19:31:44

YABU. He's 5, muddy shoes are to be expected. A bit annoying that you have to scrub the shoes, remind your DS' dad that that is part of his responsibility when he has DS.

usualsuspectsparkly3 Sun 07-Dec-14 19:32:39

Kids get muddy shoes. That's life.

He could have cleaned them though.

CMOTDibbler Sun 07-Dec-14 19:32:57

They are shoes for a 5 year old, therefore they get muddy. Where I am today, you could go to the not normally muddy park and get caked.

TheFairyCaravan Sun 07-Dec-14 19:33:19


YABU they are shoes it is mud! It will wash off!

Gileswithachainsaw Sun 07-Dec-14 19:33:29

yabu to spend 45 quid on trainers for a kid too young to. be able to take of his new shoes and that Won't last long due to being grown out of.
Yanbu to expect the adult in charge to.use their brain and dress appropriately for the activity planned. A phone call wouldn't have killed him.

iwantgin Sun 07-Dec-14 19:33:32

Why couldn't your DS' dad have cleaned off the mud before packing them up again to send home?

ThinkIveBeenHacked Sun 07-Dec-14 19:33:35

YABU. Scrape off the thick of it and bung them in the wash. He is a kids. Kids get messy. Trainers arent exactly "party shoes for best".

LaurieFairyCake Sun 07-Dec-14 19:33:39

I think you're crackers

Far more important that he went out and played outside.

I got muddy in my front garden today and had to pop mine in the wash - trainers wash up fine

ithoughtofitfirst Sun 07-Dec-14 19:34:09

Washing machine! fgrin

FrauHelgaMissMarpleandaChuckle Sun 07-Dec-14 19:34:39

Unless you warned your ex they were to be kept pristine, then YABU.

They're trainers, for kicking about in - wash them and they'll be grand.

And expensive trainers for a 5 year old is nuts. They get wrecked.

simbacatlivesagain Sun 07-Dec-14 19:34:39

So your ex bought the shoes? Or someone else?

I am confused.

They are trainers- they are meant to get dirty. What did you expect?

Fanfeckintastic Sun 07-Dec-14 19:34:43

I see your point I suppose but he's 5, he's supposed to get muddy and that should be a huge factor when buying him clothes/shoes.

usualsuspectsparkly3 Sun 07-Dec-14 19:34:52

Was he not wearing any shoes when your ex brought him home?

Not worth fuming about.

RJnomore Sun 07-Dec-14 19:34:54

He's 5, 5yo shouldn't have shoes that are too "good" to get muddy IMO.

Tinks42 Sun 07-Dec-14 19:37:35

Mud no, the dirtier the kids clothes are the more fun theyve had (he didnt plonk him in front of the TV did he).

Now, if it was dog shit then yes grin

december12 Sun 07-Dec-14 19:38:49

IMO no 5yo should have any clothes that are more important than the fun and learning he's having. An afternoon paying in the woods (or wherever) with his father is way more important than any pair of shoes AFAIC.

Put them through the washing machine. Cold wash, no detergent. They'll be fine.

ShipwreckedAndComatose Sun 07-Dec-14 19:41:52

Sorry but trainers are meant for wearing out doors and having fun in. It shows he had a good weekend.

In future send him in cheap old trainers if you don't want the mud.

KateMosley Sun 07-Dec-14 19:42:13

Kids trainers and respect in the same sentence hmm Are you Ed Milliband?

Tinks42 Sun 07-Dec-14 19:46:11

Me thinks you have an issue with your ex and it's not about the trainers at all.

KatieKaye Sun 07-Dec-14 19:48:54

Your DS was playing outside so obviously his shoes got muddy. If you were that bothered about them staying pristine you shouldn't have sent him out in them. Much better that he was out in the fresh air even if he did get his shoes dirty. And his dad even had the sense to put them in a plastic bag so the rest of his stuff didn't get dirty too.


next time, send him away wearing his wellies rather than expecting ExH to come and get them.

LynetteScavo Sun 07-Dec-14 19:54:15

It's muddy at this time of year... If you didn't want his trainers to get muddy you should have sent wellies.

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