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To feel bored and a bit...stuck

(9 Posts)
findingherfeet Fri 05-Dec-14 14:22:15

It's not the worst problem in the world!

Baby (who doesn't sleep anyway) and 3 year old have had colds for a week, pretty grim housebound week with very little sleep, thought the end was in sight but DD (3) woke being sick in the night.

I know it'll pass, I know they're both screaming at me because they're poorly but right now I feel exhausted and completly alone.

Meant to be going out for an Xmas meal with my best friends, a rare event I was so looking forward to...other mums there won't get it if I cancel because they'd have people to leave the kids with. My husband is a good dad but he works seven days a week at the moment, he's tired and fair enough he'd be a bit peeved if I left him to it, to go off and enjoy myself.

And I know they need their mum..am I being unreasonable to feel a bit panicked and suffocated by the constant demands of haing young children :-/

christinahendricksgin Fri 05-Dec-14 14:40:27

Of course you're not being unreasonable. Having two small kids is hard work and if you're doing the lion's share with little support then of course you're going to be exhausted.

I remember when I had fourth month old twins being so unbelievably lonely, so I empathise. Have you anyone to talk to in real life about how you feel?

smokinggnu Fri 05-Dec-14 14:54:48

It is very draining, but the friends might surprise you with some empathy about the situation. Maybe one could pop round for a coffee and chat?

Fudgeface123 Fri 05-Dec-14 15:02:32

Not sure why you can't leave them with your DH?

findingherfeet Fri 05-Dec-14 16:20:52

Just feel guilty, three year old will want mummy and bless him, our DS will just be screaming, first time he's been poorly (8 months)

Husband will say to go but I'll drive just in case there's a problem and to avoid having a hangover and I'll return home to an unhappy baby who'll want to sleep with me..I miss the care free days when going out wasn't such a drama!

Hubs is breaking his back with new business and is stressed and tired, he won't resent me going out but won't be erm chirpy

My friends with children do get it really, I think I'm just jealous! Their husbands don't leave for work at 7am on Sundays...my friends without children...nah they definitely don't!

Oh well it's not end of world! Thank you for sympathy :-)

Thurlow Fri 05-Dec-14 16:31:49

It's not the end of the world but it is bloody frustrating.

If you're driving, can you can for just an hour or so? You'll feel better for getting out of the house for a little bit.

AcrossthePond55 Fri 05-Dec-14 16:34:11

This, too, will pass. We all have times in our lives where life just runs away with us. I think your concern for your DH is admirable, but I also think that both of you need a break. Starting up a business is hellacious, you have no one to depend on but yourself and must give 110% to make it successful. Being a young mum at home with sick children is also hellacious, you also have no one to depend on but yourself and must give your children 110%.

Is there a chance that DH can bring home a takeaway or you can call for a pizza tonight and maybe a bottle of wine? Even if you both have to sit on the sofa to eat with sickly DCs cuddled next to you watching crap telly, at least it's something you're doing together.

My own are grown and gone. But DH and I remember 'those times' now and we can smile at them, even though at the time they weren't at all 'funny'. They brought us closer together as partners and parents because we turned to each other to 'survive' those early days.

LilyPapps Fri 05-Dec-14 16:37:26

I understand your misgivings, but I really think you should leave the car at home and go. The children will be fine with their father, and it sounds as if you really need some time for yourself. Neither you nor the children will be the better for you half-killing yourself.

findingherfeet Fri 05-Dec-14 16:54:36

Thank you, you've cheered me up....acrossthepond that's great, that's how I see me and DH on a good day, we can have a laugh about it together.

Oh sod it, I'm changing my mind! It's tomorrow night, they might be better by then...and if not DH will be tired and grumpy regardless and so will the DC...I neeeeeed to escape the crying for a night, I'll drive and just Go for a bit and then can be superior in the morning without a hangover but with renewed energy and enthusiasm for my life!!

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