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To think you don't threaten other people's children with Father Christmas not coming?

(19 Posts)
WD41 Thu 04-Dec-14 23:33:18

DD is 3. She's not usually one for public meltdowns but today she had a horrendous tantrum in Sainsburys because I wouldn't buy doughnuts. Think lying on the floor screaming etc.

3 separate people all said the same thing to her when passing - Father Christmas won't come if you're naughty (or words to that effect).

We don't go in for the whole naughty / nice thing - Father Christmas is unconditional and I don't like using him as a bribe for good behaviour.

I know that these people were probably only trying to help (I didn't say anything of course) and tbh I doubt DD was paying them much attention. But back home once she'd calmed down I told her that he would always come no matter what.

AIBU to think you shouldn't say it to a stranger's child?

WineWineWine Thu 04-Dec-14 23:35:38

I think its a horrible thing to say to any child.

LilyPapps Thu 04-Dec-14 23:38:57

God, this is my mil. Her grandparenting consists entirely of threatening children with FC not coming /the policeman coming to take them away to jail/Jackie Dark coming after them with his big black bag for bad boys and girls.

LittleBairn Thu 04-Dec-14 23:42:12

YANBU I despise the whole 'good list' crap.

BeCool Thu 04-Dec-14 23:42:22

Well there IS a naughty list you know.

Seriously I don't think it's a big deal and at this time of year it's a pretty go to thing to say.

My dd us 3 and very stroppy- several people have said this to her already this yeat smile

WD41 Thu 04-Dec-14 23:42:58

These people were all older so perhaps it's a generational thing?

I just hate the idea of a child feeling anxious that he might not come because they got overtired and couldn't control themselves.

DomiKatetrix Thu 04-Dec-14 23:45:07

I wouldn't say it to a strangers child, purely because you don't know how that child reacts to attention from a stranger.

But for the saying, it doesn't bother me. I will probably tell DC when old enough to understand that FC is watching when they're acting up.

LadyLuck10 Thu 04-Dec-14 23:47:07

It's not right to tell someone else's child this. However as for this being used on children, I see no problem. There is a naughty list.

Fanfeckintastic Thu 04-Dec-14 23:48:24

Oh I'm feeling really bad now, my 3 year old DD had her first public meltdown today and I was bloody thankful for the fear inflicting passers by!

hippo123 Thu 04-Dec-14 23:48:53

I think both you and your dd may have to get used to it to be honest. The santa who came round the houses here with the rotary club was saying the same to all the kids out tonight. they were hanging onto every word! that pnp video had santa checking his naughty or good book the other year didn't it? All the else were shown to be all anxious whilst some machine decided if you had been good enough for a visit that year.

hippo123 Thu 04-Dec-14 23:50:09


Amy106 Fri 05-Dec-14 00:52:06

YANBU. Sorry to hear about the tantrum. I am sure that was no fun for either of you and comments from strangers are not helpful.

WD41 Fri 05-Dec-14 12:06:33

Not helpful at all! Thankfully she is generally well behaved in public (it's at home where we have trouble!) so hopefully she won't keep hearing this message from strangers.

Alisvolatpropiis Fri 05-Dec-14 13:17:37

It wouldn't bother me, particularly.

Notmuchhaschanged Fri 05-Dec-14 13:24:40

Who the fuck is jackie dark!!!!! Tell me more!

BertieBotts Fri 05-Dec-14 13:29:19

It's a pretty normal thing to say especially for the older generation. I don't say it myself but don't think it's going to be horribly damaging for them to hear it once in a while. I wouldn't go out of your way to try and counteract it, either.

Honestly you mellow out about this stuff as they get older, and realise it's nowhere near as important as you think it is.

grocklebox Fri 05-Dec-14 13:31:55

People have different ideas to you and will say things that you wouldn't. Unless you want to go live in a cave with your kid you're going to have to get over it.
It's a very common idea that Santa doesn't bring presents to bold children. We tell ours they will get a sack of coal if they are too bold.....

TimelyNameChangey Fri 05-Dec-14 13:32:55

shock at Jackie Dark. I had something called "Screaming Minnie" when I was a kid!

My nan....born to Irish immigrants in Liverpool in 1910 had a load of marvelously scary characters. I think Screaming Minnie might actually have been a cross between a traditional banshee and Screaming Mimi which was a rocket launcher used in WW11 and apparently sounded awful.

Starlightbright1 Fri 05-Dec-14 13:50:09

Oh My DS has a reward chart to leave for santa..It is doing great things for making him think about behaviours I have been trying to change for ever.. I think it is something people say..

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