Hi ladies, I asked for practical funeral advice in money matters and they were very helpful, but now would like anyone with advice to help me with what to do about my dad and this situation.
My mum died on Tuesday morning, she was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer in May, she was 59 dad is 60. He became her career for the 8months so wasn't working. My mum received full pay for 6 months and half pay for the remaining 2, she had some savings and money in her account, not loads but I think about £500/1000. My DH saw a bank statement next to my dads computer a few months ago with nearly £2000 in it. He has now cleared my mums account and they are frozen.
They live in a 3 bed house roughly £220k and had about 15k left of mortgage. No credit cards or cars on finance.
Now dad is heavily hinting that he doesn't have money to pay for the funeral, my sister has now offered to pay some, she is single, no kids and earns a good wage. My auntie has felt guilty and offered £500, I said last night I don't have any money, to which he shouted said that he hadn't asked for any, but never thought about a funeral and made no plans financially. My dad flies off the handle at pretty much anything, we are all stressed obviously but he has a temper. He is also very secretive about money, he wants me to organise the funeral, and my sister to organise the wake and catering.
Should I offer to pay for some, I really don't have any money, I would have to get a loan. Have a toddler and a DH and we moved in July after scraping together a deposit for years and are mortgaged up to our eyeballs, and overdrawn. Do I get a loan or credit card to help him out???
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To think Dad should pay for Mum's funeral??
54 replies
Millie3030 · 04/12/2014 13:33
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