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AIBU to not give this present?

(38 Posts)
ChristmasBlingFest Thu 04-Dec-14 06:35:25

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MillionToOneChances Thu 04-Dec-14 06:39:54

I think your DH makes some excellent points here.

TanteRose Thu 04-Dec-14 06:42:42

I'm with your DH on this.

I know you don't "give to receive" but why bother, when they don't even send a card?

I've stopped sending Xmas cards to some of my cousins, because I never ever got one from them (I live overseas so maybe the postage is too much or something...)

Booboostoo Thu 04-Dec-14 06:43:41

I think your DH is right.

BlueGreenHazelGreen Thu 04-Dec-14 06:44:09

From what you've said your DH makes some excellent points...

andadietcoke Thu 04-Dec-14 06:45:18

We got a few 'first Christmas' presents for the DTs last year from people we wouldn't normally get presents from, and wouldn't expect to this year.

WipsGlitter Thu 04-Dec-14 06:45:43

I agree with your DH. It's a nice gesture but it sets a precedent. If you're trying to tone down then this is a good start.

rootypigsinblankets Thu 04-Dec-14 06:47:28

I would send a lovely card with a thoughtful message. I love getting birthday and Christmas cards for DD from extended family, they mean a great deal. But then I am not a rude git who doesn't write thank you cards

ChristmasBlingFest Thu 04-Dec-14 06:47:39

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hoggle246 Thu 04-Dec-14 06:47:42

I do see your DH's points, esp re starting another expensive tradition. It's lovely you're so generous though.

Why don't you give the gifts to a Christmas charity instead? That way you're still doing something lovely and the gifts will be incredibly useful I would imagine.

CaptainAnkles Thu 04-Dec-14 06:47:58

You don't see them, you don't get a thank you, they don't send so much as a card - if I were you, I wouldn't be buying them anything. It's very nice of you to continue to spend money on people who show you complete indifference, but really, stop.

Hoggle246 Thu 04-Dec-14 06:49:05

I also have absolutely no time for people who don't send thanks for gifts. It is just so rude.

justmuddlingalong Thu 04-Dec-14 06:49:10

I agree with your DH. You were generous enough to buy birth gifts. Don't set a precedent for every Christmas from now on. Cheeky mares didn't even thank you for the gifts, so no,YANBU to not give the presents.

ChristmasBlingFest Thu 04-Dec-14 06:51:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ChristmasBlingFest Thu 04-Dec-14 06:52:58

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TanteRose Thu 04-Dec-14 06:55:22

Contact Amazon anyway, they will most likely take them back and give you a refund.

or donate to local library?

justmuddlingalong Thu 04-Dec-14 06:55:33

Salvation army collect Christmas gifts to hand out.

HappyAgainOneDay Thu 04-Dec-14 06:56:45

Salvation Army?

meandjulio Thu 04-Dec-14 06:56:49

My family do very good auntie/uncle relationships but none of my aunts have bought ds a present, and tbh I never expected them to. Sometimes when I visit them they produce something for ds, usually a bit of pocket money, or once he was looking longingly at a little ornament my uncle had, and he very kindly let ds play with it, and then at the end of the visit he gave him the ornament. I was so touched, and all the more because he died a few months later so it was a real memento of him.

Don't get into a treadmill of buying presents - sending a card would be nice if you want to, or emails telling your news, and perhaps they will send pictures and build the relationship a bit more - much more important.

meandjulio Thu 04-Dec-14 06:57:32

Put them away wrapped up carefully and you can give them to a baby you are genuinely close to in the future.

Hoggle246 Thu 04-Dec-14 06:57:39

If you type 'donate Christmas gifts' into google loads of options there - great Ormand street, Salvation Army etc. Or you could contact your LA to see if there's any way in which you can donate to children in care? Or even start a thread on MN I'm sure some of these lovely people are looking after local drives

MomOfTwoGirls2 Thu 04-Dec-14 07:15:23

I'm with your DH on this. Maybe send a card. But personally I wouldn't even do that.

Contact Amazon and ask to return.
You don't need the amazon packaging, though you will need to parcel it up yourself. You don't need the receipt, they will have it on file. They will send you a label to use with address for return. Chances are that they will also pay postage. At least they did for returns last Christmas.

fuzzpig Thu 04-Dec-14 07:20:16

Glad you are returning them. Otherwise you will be back here in a few years having rightly got sick of the lack of gratitude!

Heyho111 Thu 04-Dec-14 07:30:32

I wouldn't buy for them. It all gets out of hand. Your nieces could end up with 3 kids each and you end up spending hundreds on people you don't see. Would you expect your siblings to buy your children's children presents I bet it wouldn't cross your mind that they should.

SquiggleMcSquiggle Thu 04-Dec-14 07:36:05

Your DH is right.

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