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To be shocked at the ageism on here tonight

(609 Posts)
drudgetrudy Thu 27-Nov-14 23:08:11

AIBU to be shocked at the terms used to refer to older people tonight.
We've had "old duffers", "old biddies" "old dears with nothing better to do" and this isn't a TAAT-its been on more than one thread.

If any other group were referred to in generalised and negative terms like this people would be going nuts.
People are people and come in many varieties over all age ranges.
Seriously pissed off tonight.angry

SpringBreaker Thu 27-Nov-14 23:15:09

just tonight? its all the time

squoosh Thu 27-Nov-14 23:17:42

I think that's fair. It's only since threads like these that I've stopped to think about using the word 'old' when complaining about someone.

So now, instead of saying for example 'old witch' I plump for something like 'vinegar faced cow'.

Admittedly still rude but not using their age as part of the insult!

ilovesooty Thu 27-Nov-14 23:23:34

It happens regularly.

squoosh flowers

fairyfuckwings Thu 27-Nov-14 23:23:54

My 95 year old grandma uses the term "old biddie" about others. I don't think it necessarily refers to age alone.

Devora Thu 27-Nov-14 23:25:51

Yup, all the time. It's so deeply ingrained, and so tied up with sexism. It's an odd experience, getting to middle age and realising how quickly the world decides you're not worth bothering with. Your social status - and professional status - plummets so fast it makes your head spin. Younger women should care about this (and not just because it will happen to them pretty soon). It illustrates very clearly what is really valued about women, and and that should be a real concern for all - including those on here who blithely caricature older women as 'bitter', 'dried up' old biddies.

drudgetrudy Thu 27-Nov-14 23:28:12

Yeah-nothing wrong with "vinegar-faced cow"-its directed against an individual.
Its the prejudice against a group that's winding me up.(She's over 60-she must be in the wrong-the stupid old fucker!")

Tobyjugg Thu 27-Nov-14 23:30:07

What is TAAT?

Waltonswatcher Thu 27-Nov-14 23:31:58

My questioning ,intelligent, well rounded daughter is terribly ageist . I notice it when listening to her watch programmes like Strictly . It's her worst trait.
We are not a media obsessed family- no mags, newspapers,limited technology. I don't know where she's absorbed it from . Or, it is just part of our evolutionary pattern. The young and fit seek out the young and fit!

drudgetrudy Thu 27-Nov-14 23:31:59

Thread about a thread-generally frowned on.

drudgetrudy Thu 27-Nov-14 23:37:07

Evolutionary-to a point-younger people in general don't fancy older people-but its generalising to totally dismissing the voice and views of older people and not seeing everyone as an individual.
If it was directed at any other group there would be an outcry.
Perhaps women get it worse but older men don't appear to be exempt.

Tobyjugg Thu 27-Nov-14 23:38:43

Thanks drudge

Waltonswatcher Thu 27-Nov-14 23:42:11

Where ageism is concerned in the sixty plus bracket,I think older men suffer worse actually. Just an observation .

drudgetrudy Thu 27-Nov-14 23:52:15

I know ageism is widespread generally but surprised to see so much of it on here where racism, sexism and homophobia are anathema to most.
The ageism tends to be worse here than it is in general.

SconeRhymesWithGone Thu 27-Nov-14 23:54:50

Good post, Devora.

The intersection of ageism and sexism is a very nasty place.

SconeRhymesWithGone Thu 27-Nov-14 23:56:54

It is supposed to be prohibited on MN, but obviously a prohibition not enforced.

ilovesooty Fri 28-Nov-14 00:00:57

You're right Scone - it isn't.

Great post Devora.

Tobyjugg Fri 28-Nov-14 00:11:15

I've not been on MN long, but there is a tendency on some threads to see those over 55 as holding views that are irrelevant.

drudgetrudy Fri 28-Nov-14 00:16:56

Yes and to assume all people over 55 hold the same views. Why would they?
Do all people in their 40s hold the same views-have they all got the same personalities?

Dancingincircles Fri 28-Nov-14 00:56:42

Sadly no judge Trudy

southeastastra Fri 28-Nov-14 01:06:51

i dunno, people come on here to vent and it's just a way of expressing a feeling. yesterday someone called toffs inbred. that's pretty shocking too imo though no-one cared really.

LuannDelaney Fri 28-Nov-14 01:13:48

The difference between toffs and older women is that toffs have power. If older women held 'the reins' it would be a different story. Vive le change!

trackrBird Fri 28-Nov-14 01:31:30

There is a lot of ageism in the press generally, with the media freely blaming the elderly or late middle aged for many of society's ills. It's a very disturbing trend.

If other demographic groups were targeted in this way there would be uproar.

I've seen a fair smattering of ageism on MN. Some of it is unwitting. I do think it's time to crack down on ageist and sexist language such as 'some old dear' or 'some old biddy'. One day soon that will be you

Thebodynowchillingsothere Fri 28-Nov-14 02:02:41

Devora brilliant post

ArsenicSoup Fri 28-Nov-14 02:07:48

Younger women should care about this (and not just because it will happen to them pretty soon).

Yes we should, for reasons of solidarity as well as foresight.

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