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AIBH to not send Christmas cards to acquaintances?

(22 Posts)
Thebadelf Thu 27-Nov-14 20:17:20

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fluffyears Thu 27-Nov-14 20:23:44

If you get told off say you are donating the money you'd usually spend to charity after all that is what christmas should be about.

Lottiedoubtie Thu 27-Nov-14 20:29:41

I'm adopting a policy of only sending cards to people who send me one first this year wink in my defence I have a new baby. And I'd ignore any tellings off, practice your 'piss off' face!

Thebadelf Thu 27-Nov-14 20:38:25

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tunna Thu 27-Nov-14 20:42:50

Stick a note on FB saying you're not giving out cards this year and instead donating the money to -insert worthy charity- here. Do this now before you start receiving cards and get guilt tripped into sending cards.

Even better, set up a just giving page and guilt people into suoport ink said charity. Sometimes FB has its uses! grin

ILovedYouYesterday Thu 27-Nov-14 20:47:01

It's tricky with family. I send them to keep the peace. My family isn't too huge, though I do wonder if I can slowly start to ease off on sending them to cousin's adult children at some point (along with not wanting them to feel that they have to send one to me every year!) I don't mind sending to my Granny and Great Aunts as I know it means a lot to them and they won't be around for ever.

It's hard though isn't it and I can't really explain why.

Sometimes I think the best I can do is vow not to pass the pressure on to my own children!

Dh sends about a million cards so we always get loads back. I used to faff around finding places to display them all but a couple of years ago, decided I wasn't doing it any more and, if he wants to put them up he can knock himself out! I put rellie ones up and all the ones from DH's huge pile (once read) go in a pretty box on the fireplace.

Birdsgottafly Thu 27-Nov-14 20:51:53

I don't send or give cards to anyone except my elderly Mother, because of the environmental impact.

I think that's a sound reason.

I also don't go in for unnecessary gift/stuff buying.

I do make the effort to visit people and go on nights out, though.

fredfredgeorgejnr Thu 27-Nov-14 20:52:19

You just don't do it... and then if they say anything you just "ooh sorry, just can't be bothered with all the waste and expense."

You really don't need to do more, lots of people no longer bother with Christmas cards you'll not be unique any more.

americanpancake Thu 27-Nov-14 20:56:17

I tried 'no Christmas cards' a couple of years ago then ended up feeling so guilty that I sent everyone New Year cards! confused

Thebadelf Thu 27-Nov-14 21:08:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MomOfTwoGirls2 Thu 27-Nov-14 21:46:43

I lost my address book during an international move 10 years ago. Haven't posted a Christmas card since. People just stopped them to me after a while. No big drama. But I didn't have any pressure from family about it.

minkymuskyslyoldstoaty Thu 27-Nov-14 21:50:40

i guess that first Xmas you don't send will be the one you feel bad. Then fingers crossed people don't bother the next.

I am tempted this year.

fatowl Fri 28-Nov-14 00:06:08

I normally do send cards, but am having a year off. We've had a horrible couple of months, work is crazy and four weeks til xmas I have done nothing. It is going to a quiet one. I will probably send one to MIL, as she will expect one, but everyone else can not have one this year. Doubt 80% will even notice.

Thebadelf Fri 28-Nov-14 07:31:54

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kim147 Fri 28-Nov-14 07:33:51

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Preciousbane Fri 28-Nov-14 07:35:27

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Mehitabel6 Fri 28-Nov-14 07:36:56

I phone them up instead and have found that they are really pleased to have a conversation rather than a card.
I actually love cards but I resent paying postage and it is the obvious place to cut down.

Fallingovercliffs Fri 28-Nov-14 11:14:05

I think Christmas cards can be a bit of a minefield and it's one tradition I don't really like. A lot of them are sent reluctantly out of a sense of duty; there's all the awkwardness of' I didn't send soandso a card and now they've sent me one' or 'such and such didn't send me a card this year. Should I read something into that' etc etc.
Also I think a lot of people see them as a sign of popularity, which they aren't really anymore as so many people just email or text Christmas wishes around.

Lushlush Fri 28-Nov-14 11:34:34

I have cut mine down to a dozen a year only mainly I send ones to the older generation and a few childhood friends then that is it.

I used to send over 30 cards out it was so boring.

Lomega Fri 28-Nov-14 12:43:02

YANBU, we send cards to people we know well and see in real life, not some old aged aunt we've met once and never seen again haha.

My PIL are in the 'telling off' school of thought and think if we forget someone it's a terrible show of bad manners. I put them straight last year saying it was none of their business who we sent cards to or not, and if they felt strongly enough about it to send one from the whole family to -random person-.

QueenofallIsee Fri 28-Nov-14 12:44:18

Your family sound a bit like grabby twunts to be honest - your Dad has asked and expects you to spend £70 on him?? seriously? I would send the cards and not buy anyone a gift to be honest!

cheesecakemom Fri 28-Nov-14 12:48:49

My PIL get upset if you send a gift without a card!! What on earth is that about?

It's not really what Christmas is about. In any case I send only religious Christmas cards - on purpose.

I'm also shocked by reading on the forum how many gifts people get their kids for the "magic". I asked DH how many gifts he got as a child and he said 20 each!!! Talk about excessive and greedy. We won't do that for DD as it's so unnecessary.

So no YANBU. Do you even get cards from these people?

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