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Ex (d)h taking 3ds on a date!!

(9 Posts)
LittleMissGiggles7 Thu 27-Nov-14 14:31:48

Don't want to drip feed so by of back story...

Stbxh and I split up in May, he has our 3ds every other Saturday night. I want him to have them more but apparently too busy with work.hmm

I started a casual relationship with a man a couple of months ago, last weekend casual relationship man (let's call him M) said he wants more and than casual etc etc. M has not met my children and will not be doing whilst the relationship in new but they do know that it have a friend called M who I sometimes go for a drink with bit I insist he is only a friend.

Last month Ds1 came home upset as they had been at exs and daddy's new girlfriend (let's call her E) came over for dinner and spent the evening with them. As expected I was not happy as he only has them 2 nights a month and has to have new girlfriend E over on one those nights. I explained this was not acceptable and do not want the boys introduced to partners unless it's a serious relationship

Last weekend was ds1 birthday they were at their dads and came home on the Sunday- they went to a soft play centre and met daddy's new girlfriend (let's call her A).

I have hit the roof with stbxh that he has introduced 2 women to our children in 2 months, he think iabu as I have a boyfriend (sort of- even though they haven't met him) he said it's up to him who he introduced to the boys when they are with him.

I am so unhappy about this, what can I do??

MistAndAWeepingRain Thu 27-Nov-14 14:34:34

I am so unhappy about this, what can I do??

Nothing I'm afraid. He has shown very poor judgement but there is nothing you can do about it. He has the right to parent as he sees fit.

DoraGora Thu 27-Nov-14 14:35:33

Nothing, really. You've spoken to him about it and it seems as though he doesn't much care. If you want them to see him, presumably, that means that they'll see the aspects of his behaviour that you approve of and the ones that you don't.

Jolleigh Thu 27-Nov-14 14:38:17

Though I agree he's well out of line, he's right. You don't get a say in who he introduces them to. I do feel for you, really, but unless your DCs decide they don't want to see him because he's always with a different woman, you can't do a thing.

DoraGora Thu 27-Nov-14 14:40:01

Maybe if there's a deeper concern that you have, which is not to be very serious about partners and have lots of them, and you think that your ex is teaching your children the art of forming bad relationships you could speak to him about that. Or, and this is, I think what I'd do, wait for a bit and see if one of these relationships actually works out. If one does, I suspect the ones that didn't will soon be forgotten about.

smokinggnu Thu 27-Nov-14 14:42:14

Nothing to do. If it helps my ex's introducing DD's to various girlfriends over a couple of years has bit him in the ass this year. He's moved in with the current gf and the DD pretty much see her as some temporary person and have no interest in the (perfectly nice) woman no matter how hard she tries.
He is so jealous of how they've taken to my DH.

addictedtobass Thu 27-Nov-14 15:00:06

Nothing you can do. I think your boys will get the idea about their dad if he keeps introducing them to randoms.

needaholidaynow Thu 27-Nov-14 15:00:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PurpleSwift Thu 27-Nov-14 15:22:49

Nothing you can do. I don't think there's actually a lot wrong with them meeting these woman - children meet new people everyday! But him introducing them as his girlfriend, especially so soon - not impressive. I don't think it'll harm the children though. When they're older they'll look back and probably think their dad is a bit of a twunt.

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