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She doesn't want to be friends anymore as her boyfriend fancies me

(5 Posts)
kelliebrookexoxo Tue 25-Nov-14 21:52:15

Okay, here goes... I became good friends with a girl last year when she started working at the restaurant I worked at. We regularly meet up for coffee, nights out, and dinners with our partners. Neither of us work at the restaurant anymore though. Anyway, for the past 2 weeks or so she has been ,quite obviously, ignoring me. Not replying to my texts, or just sending very short/blunt messages. The last time we met up was for a double date with our partners- cinema and dinner out. Anyway, I decided to call her and ask her what was up, had I done anything to offend her. No answer, so I texted. I couldn't believe her reply. Her reply was that she was very sorry but she couldn't be friends with me anymore as her partner liked me too much, and constantly commented about what a good body I have/ told her he wanted to have a threesome with me and her/ said my husband is so lucky to have me.

I'm very upset that she doesn't want to be friends anymore. If this was the other way around and it was my partner, I would have been livid with him, but I wouldn't stop being her friend because of it! I also don't know what to make of her honesty, it has taken me by surprise. Surely it would have been easier to lie or just carry on ignoring me or something? I don't know...

Catypillar Tue 25-Nov-14 21:55:04

If I was her I'd have got rid of the boyfriend, not the friend! How odd.

ilikebaking Tue 25-Nov-14 21:57:53

She has issues. Her partner is rude.
Wouldn't even give her another thought.

Calloh Tue 25-Nov-14 21:57:58

If it were me I would get rid of the man, but if I had really liked him and hadn't known my friend very long, then I think any pain I felt may overshadow the friendship too. Sorry OP

She's made her choice, one that's understandably painful for you as, she's chosen her relationship with him over one with you. I don't think it was a wise way for her to react as unless you are a very rare beauty and personality indeed, I imagine the problem will continue as he will encounter other people he finds attractive and what's she going to do then? Try to keep him away from everyone?

If she turns to you when the relationship inevitably fails, I would be politely sympathetic but keep her at arms length. She's shown how much she values your friendship here.

It's not very nice being dumped by a friend, let them have each other, pair of plonkers.

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