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AIBU?

To not understand how co sleepers manage to get a proper nights sleep?

46 replies

Fixerupperz · 25/11/2014 20:02

I had dd2 in our bed last night as she wouldn't sete and kept waking every so often to check she was ok.... how do you all manage it without worrying they will roll out of the bed etc?

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KittyandTeal · 25/11/2014 20:06

Cot wedged up against the side, then a bed guard.

If you do it all the time you just change the way you sleep or get things in to help.

I couldn't have not coslept with dd until she was about 20 months. It was the only way I could get some sleep. Then she got too big and we kicked her out on her own :)

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startrek90 · 25/11/2014 20:08

desperation for me.... DS doesn'T actually sleep but he goes quiet long enough and I am exhausted enough to sleep...not sure thats the proper way of doing it but at 4am in the morning I will do anything

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MoreSnowPlease · 25/11/2014 20:10

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MoreSnowPlease · 25/11/2014 20:11

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Iggly · 25/11/2014 20:14

I don't know how people who don't cosleeping got any sleep, at least in the early days! I remember when ds was born, putting him in the cot and literally straining my ears to hear him breath. When he was next to me, I relaxed and could sleep.

Obviously as he got older that changed. Same with dd - stopped cosleeping because she was a wriggler.

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teacher54321 · 25/11/2014 20:14

Me neither. Ds is a fidgeting nightmare.

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SunshineDaisiesButterMellow · 25/11/2014 20:17

It is so much easier for me to plop out a breast and feed ds and fall back asleep before he is properly crying out.
I don't think I would have managed getting out of bed to sort him out. I would be sleep deprived as I take a long time to get back to sleep once I'm properly awake.

Also sleeping next to me made him a much better sleeper. Same with dd 4 years ago.

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Mintberrycrunch · 25/11/2014 20:22

Does wedging the cot in between the wall and our bed count as co sleeping? Dd2 (4m) does wake me up when she wakes up, Least I don't have to get out of bed to stick her dummy in etc,or sometimes hold her hand. She has slept pretty well from 6 weeks old.

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CrohnicallyAnxious · 25/11/2014 20:24

If you're going to co sleep, do it safely. Make sure baby can't fall out of bed (we used a toddler bed guard at first, then put DD's cot next to the bed with the side off). Keep quilts and pillows well away from baby. Then sheer exhaustion took over and I slept like, well not like a baby!- up until we made the decision to co sleep DD slept no longer than 2 hours at a time, and more often it was 30 minutes.

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Neverbuyheliumbalonz · 25/11/2014 20:28

We technically 'co-slept' with dd until she was 6 months as we had a co-sleeping cot ie. a crib that dh took the side off and bungee corded to the bed!

However, having the child actually in bed with you? I would hate it!

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BustyCraphopper · 25/11/2014 20:37

Desperation here too.

Dd1 would feed every hour and a half - and take 45 minutes to feed - during her first 3 months day and night (un diagnosed tongue tie) meaning I had slightly less than 45 minutes slots in which to sleep. Less if you include nappy changes as she pooed at every feed.... Dd2 is better but still doesn't sleep more than 3 hours in a row even now at 12 months. But they both are very very quickly fed back to sleep so it's easy to pull them close, flop a boon out, go back to sleep, only waking to put it back if a cold nipple annoys Grin

We have a cosleeper cot against a kingsize bed and a foam bed bumper on the far side. Dp has his own bedroom as he can't cope with the night wakenings so dd2 (1) is in the cot, then me, then dd1 (now 3). Loads of room. You adjust I suppose but at least I never have to get out of bed!

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bigbluestars · 25/11/2014 20:39

Co sleeping with my babies kept me sane. We had a super king size matress laid directly on the floor- so nowhere to fall to.

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Purpleflamingos · 25/11/2014 20:39

It was far easier to do night feeds.
We still co sleep some nights now and they are 5&3 yrs!

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Liara · 25/11/2014 20:40

Well I wasn't going to sleep anyway if they weren't in with me, so it was a little sleep or no sleep at all. I took a little sleep.

Barrier on the side of the bed for the rolling off thing, they woke me up too often to worry about anything else.

I was also a compulsive checker of them, so if I had been in another bed even if they were sleeping I would probably have got up several times a night to check on them (I did initially when they slept in their own beds - at 4yo Blush)

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Fixerupperz · 25/11/2014 20:50

I had no idea there was a proper way people did this Blush

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HumblePieMonster · 25/11/2014 20:52

co-sleeping is the only way to get a good night's sleep when you have little ones.

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bigbluestars · 25/11/2014 20:55

We coslept for years- until our kids wanted to move to their big bed. We never used a cot. We all slept together like a pile of puppies. Bliss.

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BustyCraphopper · 25/11/2014 20:58

there is cosleeping advice out there and personally I think it's much safer to plan to bed share than be bringing small babies into bed in the morning and falling asleep with them surrounded by fluffy duvets and pillows. Or worse, fall asleep feeding them on the sofa.


So I just have one foam pillow, a blanket and I layer up in fleec jumpers etc and a specially adapted round neck cheapo fleece jumper with a feeding slot cut in it so I don't get a cold chest

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carabos · 25/11/2014 21:03

We co-slept with DS2 until he was weaned at 27 months. I didn't get a decent night's sleep the entire time .

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EveDallasRetd · 25/11/2014 21:12

We co slept with DD from 3 months until 2 years solidly and on and off again until she was 5 or 6 - even now (she's 9) she'll pop into bed with me on odd occasions.

We did it through desperation, she was feeding far too often and for far too long. By taking her into our bed I sort of cat-napped through each feed. She also settled quicker and slept longer if I was holding her - in the day she would only sleep in my arms or in a sarong tied around me (I hadn't heard of slings). We gave her crib away unused Smile If she was in her cot she would wake almost continuously and none of us got any sleep.

I'm actually an amazingly light sleeper - for eg I will hear the dog quietly pad into our bedroom in the middle of the night if she needs to go out. So it's possible I didn't have a 'proper' sleep the whole time, however she never disturbed me. I would half wake when she needed a feed, latch her on and stay half awake until she finished - she always fed to sleep.

We did it all wrong though - she slept in the crook of my arm, under the quilt in between DH (a heavy sleeper) and me. I wouldn't recommend it, it could have gone horribly wrong.

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Bunbaker · 25/11/2014 21:16

There seems to be more than one way of co-sleeping. DD was in our room, about three feet away from me. I tried having her in bed next to me, but I couldn't sleep because I was afraid of rolling onto her.

"It is so much easier for me to plop out a breast and feed ds and fall back asleep before he is properly crying out."

That only works if they are big enough. I had to sit up to feed DD because I am not at all well endowed.

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Pico2 · 25/11/2014 21:27

How old is your DD?

We did:

Sidecar cot
Sleeping on my side of the bed with a bed guard
Sleeping between us.

From 6 months she was in her own cot, but came into us if she woke up.

DD is now 4 and sleeps in her own bed, but comes in and sleeps between us perhaps 2 nights a week from 1am or later.

We have a super king bed, so there is quite a lot of room. She has her own pillow between ours.

I have no idea how people manage to get enough sleep without cosleeping, but we have a very cuddly DD.

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Carrierpenguin · 25/11/2014 21:27

How old is your dc? If a baby then I slept really well with dd alongside me in a nest. Now she's 3 I sleep really well cuddling her.

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Curiouslygrumpycola · 25/11/2014 21:30

Bed nest, then bed guard. Dc2 liked to sleep in the crook of my arm, so he wasn't going anywhere.

I slept better with dc1. Dc2 wriggles, fidgets and hits out in his sleep too much. Smile

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Purplepoodle · 25/11/2014 21:33

I never slept properly with co sleeping when dc were babies as I woke every 20mins or so most time fell asleep bf the would try and pop them into bedside crib. Probably got more sleep though than if I hadn't co slept. Once bf was over for me at about 8/9 months they were firmly in their own cots in their own room. Ds2 (who's 3) has took the notion to pop into my bed once in awhile as Dh isn't home at night - it's a bloody nightmare. King size bed and still he sleeps sideways and kicks me.

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