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I think I made my pregnant friend cry, was I BU?

(10 Posts)
RollaCola Mon 24-Nov-14 12:45:57

My friend is about 30 weeks pregnant and isn't sleeping well, she also has a toddler and a school aged DC.

At the end of last week I arranged with her to drop some furniture over at her house. The furniture was something a relative of mine was giving away which my friend wanted. On Saturday we were going to the relative's house so picking it up would have been easy, but my friend was going out on Saturday so I arranged to make another journey to pick it up and take it over on Sunday. I should also add we have quite a small car so this item filled the boot to the extent you can't see out of the rear view mirror properly.

When I arrived at my friends house on Sunday she wasn't in, this was about 5.30pm so I texted her to say we had the furniture in the car and could she text me when she got home so we could drop it over then. She didn't get back to me until gone 10.30pm, by which time both DH and I were in PJs and neither of us felt like going out again. In the same text my friend also told me that she wasn't going to be able to meet me for coffee on Monday as we'd arranged because she'd forgotten that she had already arranged to meet another friend.

I was a bit annoyed, and texted back that she should have told me she was planning on going out on Sunday as we'd picked up the furniture and filled the car with it, she texted back that she was sorry but she'd forgotten we were coming over. I didn't say anything about the coffee being cancelled, or anything remotely bitchy or unpleasant, but when I saw her at the school gates this morning she made a pointed remark to me about how sensitive she was at the moment, and how even the slightest criticism could set her off crying.

Incidentally we didn't have anywhere to put the furniture so it's still in the car, DH has had to go to work with it in the boot, and will drop it off on his way home

I feel really guilty about making her cry, but I'm also still quite pissed off about her being out. Am I BU or not?

LaurieFairyCake Mon 24-Nov-14 12:48:39

Yanbu, it was very mild 'criticism'. Her issue, not yours.

Ignore it though, you might feel less annoyed in a few days.

Thebodynowchillingsothere Mon 24-Nov-14 12:49:08

No I don't think you should.

She was rude and should have apologised.

Millions of people are pregnant and have toddlers. No excuse to be rude.

She sounds a tad princessy.

HellonHeels Mon 24-Nov-14 12:49:58

Ha g n, you had an arrangement with your friend that you were (very kindly) going to go out of your way to collect a piece of furniture she wanted and deliver it to her, you arrived at her house at appointed time to find she was out?

She's taking the piss! Pregnant or not that's not on. YANBU

museumum Mon 24-Nov-14 12:51:41

I don't see why you have to feel either guilty or pissed off.

Just accept that she's overbooked, over-committed, stressed and hormonal, we've all been there.

You don't need to feel guilty as you didn't do anything wrong, and yes she was a bit unreliable and maybe a little rude but maybe be a bit understanding and don't feel too pissed off either?

divingoffthebalcony Mon 24-Nov-14 12:51:51

She's been beyond inconsiderate, and you were well within her rights to tell her that. So you made her hormonal self cry? Boo hoo. I have no time for emotional blackmail!

mumnosbest Mon 24-Nov-14 12:53:35

Being pg isn't an excuse for being ignorant. Yanbu

Goldmandra Mon 24-Nov-14 12:53:40

She is being rather precious and a bit PA by making sure you knew she had been in tears. If she knew she was being over sensitive, she should have kept that to herself.

She is lucky to have a friend who is willing to run around after her like that. I wouldn't have done it.

fancyanotherfez Mon 24-Nov-14 12:58:59

She sounds inconsiderate, and then to add to it decided to use her pregnancy as an excuse for her behaviour! I'd be mightily pissed off to have done her a favour and then had to lug a piece of furniture around town until it was convenient to her.

RollaCola Mon 24-Nov-14 12:59:04

museumum, I think you're probably right. I need to drop it don't I? It's not really a big deal.

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