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to think if the government want more mum's in work they need to do something about childcare costs

(153 Posts)
wheresthelight Sat 22-Nov-14 21:35:45

unplanned pregnancy so no time to save and very ill prior and during pregnancy so was signed off by work's occupational health as unfit for work. due to a variety of issues I didn't go back and dp was adamant we could afford if we tightened reigns etc. due to car issues and Christmas plus dsd's school trips we have had an expensive few months but dp still treats himself to a £5 magazine every week and pays out for a gym membership he doesn't use. I do an admittedly expensive swimming class with dd (now 15 months) but I spend nothing on myself outside of this as I have no money. we get no benefits whatsoever and although dp is on a good wage by the time bills etc is paid there isn't a lot left.

he is stressing about money and I really want to go back to work but due to childcare costs it is proving almost impossible!! nursery is £££ whilst a childminder is not so bad however the job market round here is appalling. everything is either nursing or teaching and am not qualified for either. lots of home help type jobs but due to a disability I am unable to do this but even if I could the wages mean that I would be working for nothing by the time childcare is paid which negates the point of going back to work.

how the hell do people do this??

ilikebaking Sat 22-Nov-14 21:39:46

Two children may increase your tax credits. And you will get child benefit.
People move home, use precautions, or have abortions. God knows. But people do afford their lifestyles.

Your partner needs to cancel his gym membership, and you should quit swimming.

Heels99 Sat 22-Nov-14 21:40:48

Some people are in higher paying jobs. Some people wait till they get their 15 hours for 38 weeks free childcare, some people wwait till,their children go to school.

Mums I know do childminding, evening work in shops and bars, ironing etc. would those options be available to you?

26Point2Miles Sat 22-Nov-14 21:43:03

So child carers should be paid less?

Or do you expect the government to pay your childcare?

cestlavielife Sat 22-Nov-14 21:51:55

Some one still has to pay the child carers . Would your dp pay more tax to fund it ?

Your dp doesn't t need the magazine and your toddler doesn't need expensive swimming class....

cestlavielife Sat 22-Nov-14 21:53:14

Child care costs in early years are investment in future if you in a job where salary rises with experience.

poisonintheblood Sat 22-Nov-14 21:53:50


A system that means those in low paid work aren't effectively managed out of working by having children can bring only positives.

wheresthelight Sat 22-Nov-14 21:57:28

unfortunately i have no one to have dd at night as dp works nights so needs to be daytime work heels

26point that isn't what i am saying but i have looked at all my options and we cannot afford to pay for childcare. I do expect that the government look at the costs of it however and at the very least standardise it!

The 15 hours isn't actually free if you work though because the providers just bump up the cost of the hours you do pay for to cover it which still means i gain no benefit from it.

I would love a higher paying job but unfortunately to do that i would need to move and that would mean leaving dp as he needs to be where we are for his older kids

Loletta Sat 22-Nov-14 21:59:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wheresthelight Sat 22-Nov-14 21:59:59

cestlavie - i agree however when the cost of that care currently is more than i can earn where is the benefit? Currently it would put more pressure on dp as he would still have to cover my bills as he is currently but would then need to find more to top up childcare also as it would swallow all my wages and then some

26Point2Miles Sat 22-Nov-14 22:01:17

What do you mean by standardise it?

wheresthelight Sat 22-Nov-14 22:01:23

the swimming is the only thing i do outside the house and the only time i get to spend with other people as i try not to go out as the car needs fuel etc and that all costs money so i want to try and keep it going and it benefits dd hugely to socialise and she learns an important life skill

BikeRunSki Sat 22-Nov-14 22:01:49

Some people work "for free" ie: their take home pay contribution to the family coffers is no more than childcare costs. The idea is that NI gets paid, and any other benefits like pension, child care vouchers are bonuses. You get to keep/start/develop a career/job and hope that, in time, childcare costs will only go down and salary will only go up.

Loletta Sat 22-Nov-14 22:02:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

26Point2Miles Sat 22-Nov-14 22:02:55

And why does all the child are costs fall on you anyway? Pay half each??

Loletta Sat 22-Nov-14 22:03:24

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Loletta Sat 22-Nov-14 22:04:53

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wheresthelight Sat 22-Nov-14 22:04:56

26point - nurseries round here range from £50-75 a day but looking at their services etc they all offer the same, all are outstanding ofsted. Childminders seem to range from £3.50-5 and on top of that both options then want additional monies for nappies, trips, snacks etc.

I guess my biggest issue is to apply for a job i need to already have some childcare in place, but i cannot arrange childcare without knowing what job i will be doing and hours i would be working.

Lots of the places hiring want you to be flexible which is fine in principal however childcare providers quite rightly need firm commitments on days/hours needed which limits how flexible you can be when you have zero support outside of that system.

BikeRunSki Sat 22-Nov-14 22:05:48

The 15 hours isn't actually free if you work though because the providers just bump up the cost of the hours you do pay for to cover it

Not ours

I don't think they are allowed to anyway

wheresthelight Sat 22-Nov-14 22:07:02

loletta - yup absolutely certain, have filled in the forms and been told we aren't entitled to anything by hmrc.

paying half each wouldn't make any overall difference to the amount it costs! Dp would still have to top up my money to cover my credit card bill, phone bill and car costs

aermingers Sat 22-Nov-14 22:07:44

Why do you have to use a nursery? I use a childminder and she is absobloodylutely marvellous. Also I was made redundant about 18 months ago and had to temp for a few months and she was as flexible as possible to allow me to work varying shifts for a while and really supportive knowing it was only short term and I was a reliable customer who paid.

Don't rule one out. Do you live in London? I don't but if you do you really have my sympathy. I get childcare tax credits but I know if you are down south the difference in wages and the extortionate rents you pay aren't taken into account which must make things extremely hard. I really think the threshold in London should be much higher.

wheresthelight Sat 22-Nov-14 22:08:22

bike - they may not be 'allowed' to but having looked into it a lot - a great many do

wheresthelight Sat 22-Nov-14 22:10:30

aermingers - have looked into both and childminder is the only way i could afford it, however the issue still arises over not being able to source one until i know what hours i need to cover.

am not in london thankfully

pointythings Sat 22-Nov-14 22:15:32

YANBU, OP. Other countries in Europe put a lot more money into subsidising childcare so that working is worthwhile. It's the way to go if you want both parents to work and be productive, and in a lot of these countries, people working in childcare are graduates and are well paid. We really need to do better.

If I had two under 5 now, I would be paying out 98% of my wages in childcare. And that's in Suffolk, where childcare is relatively affordable. It's much worse even a little way down the road in Cambridge.

wheresthelight Sat 22-Nov-14 22:22:59

pointy - that is interesting to know about Europe! It seems mental that the government batter sahp's for being at home but then don't do anything to actually help with the barriers back to work!

A friend of mine thinks i am lucky because i am at home, but she gets all her childcare free from her father in law who is retired. My parents both work and dp's dad is in his 80's and in no way able to look after a highly energetic 15 month old! When i showed her the cost of childcare she suddenly had a very big change of heart regarding a few issues she had with her fil and some of the things he had been doing with her dd!

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