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AIBU?

To think boys can like frozen too?

50 replies

Hurr1cane · 22/11/2014 15:01

I just assumed they did, DS loves things like climbing trees and getting muddy, like I did as a child, but he also likes the frozen film and frozen dolls.

Today tesco had a 'frozen event' on, I didn't realise beforehand but we were in town anyway buying him some new stiff, uncomfortable boots to wear with his new, uncomfortable insoles because his feet have become extremely deformed through not walking with the correct support and his knees and legs are a bit out of whack as well. He's very much struggling to walk at the moment and I have to hold him up and help him if you see what I mean so he doesn't fall. It is quite obvious at the moment that he is disabled where it isn't usually and we were quite obviously struggling today.

Anyway as a treat for him being really good and putting them on I decided to take him to look at the frozen event, we queued up for the colouring, at which point a woman pushed past him and sent him flying to get to a chair first with her daughter. There were plenty of chairs. Then gave me a funny look when I sat DS down.

The table was full of girls but DS didn't notice, and the staff were really talking to every child, except DS. Anyway he did his colouring and we walked very slowly to the queue for the free sticker book and really naff crown thing that he was pointing at since we sat down.

When we got to the queue and waited someone pushed past and stood in front of us again, I said excuse me we are in the queue as well and she looked at DS and said 'oh I didn't think you would be' and then carried in standing in front of us.

Then when we got to the front the woman handed him a colouring book and then started talking to the little girl behind him about the crowns, DS was pointing at the crowns and bouncing so I asked if he could have one as well and she said "oh... Ok" passed him one and carried on ignoring him Sad

I felt really shit for him. I don't think it had anything to do with his disability though and everything to do with the fact he's a boy. It really annoyed me, the crown wasn't even a girly thing it was just a naff paper effort with pictures of all the characters on it.

I ended up feeling that I might have been unreasonable to take him to a 'girls thing' but I really didn't think it was.

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Purplepixiedust · 22/11/2014 15:06

You were not unreasonable. Definately not. How horrible of everyone :(

My son enjoyed the frozen film and is looking forward to meeting some princesses when we go to DLP!

I think if there was an event he would have wanted to join in. More so at 5 or 6 than now he is 8 but I couldn't be sure and if he wanted to I would take him and expect him to be treated like the others.

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Hurr1cane · 22/11/2014 15:12

DS is 8 but has severe learning disabilities and autism as well as other disabilities/ health problems and has the mental age of about 2/3.

He is good as gold though so it wouldn't have been that anyone was put out by his behaviour.

I don't usually notice him being treated differently as I walk around with blinkers on but this was so obvious it upset me a bit.

DS would LOVE to meet them at DLP! I missed the frozen party at his 'girlfriends' dads play area (he doesn't know what a girlfriend is but she insists he is hers and he's quite happy for her to hold his hand and boss him about) and was gutted because he would have loved that too.

He's getting frozen stuff for Christmas. But now I feel like in doing something really weird by letting him like it. Sad

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needtomanup · 22/11/2014 15:12

Of course boys like it too. Sorry your little boy was treated badly.

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NellysKnickers · 22/11/2014 15:13

People are just rude twats. Ds2 loves Frozen. He's made himself a Princess Elsa crown. I have to wear my hair in a plait so I look like Elsa Grin Your DS sounds like a little treasure.

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hellodave · 22/11/2014 15:13

YANBU

Ds recently asked if a toy was "for boys". I told him that unless a willy was essential to play with the toy then it was for whoever liked it.

(P.s all my boys aged 5-11 like frozen)

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YonicScrewdriver · 22/11/2014 15:14

Of course YANBU.

Get him what he loves for Xmas. Don't let the cockwombles put you off.

Flowers

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JimmyCorkhill · 22/11/2014 15:14

I think you need to do a tweet about this to Tesco. It's not their fault that the other customers were rude but it was out of order that their staff were dismissive. Tweets are usually a sure fire way to get a quick response (so I'm told - old gimmer emoticon!)

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Chefpepperjack · 22/11/2014 15:15

Of course they can, and do . What a horrible day you've had.
My ds is 7 and loves it

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JimmyCorkhill · 22/11/2014 15:15

I told him that unless a willy was essential to play with the toy then it was for whoever liked it.

Genius Grin

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NellysKnickers · 22/11/2014 15:16

Don't feel bad about him liking it or what people class as girls stuff. Ds2 is currently sporting bright red nails, toes and fingers and is getting a girls world for Christmas!

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PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 22/11/2014 15:17

Dd and I went and had a fantastic time the staff was amazing.

Frozen is for all.

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Bulbasaur · 22/11/2014 15:20

Maybe they thought he was just there with a sister or something?

Either way, he shouldn't have been treated like that. That said, having gone to events like this as a kid, people are just rude and want their stuff with no consideration for others. If you had a girl, except for maybe weird looks, the same thing likely would have happened.

Crowds + Limited supplies = Assholes.

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dancestomyowntune · 22/11/2014 15:21

My boys LOVE frozen. They are 7 & 8 years old and the 8 year old in particular has only asked for all things OLAF for Christmas. He has several olaf tops, we've bought him a talking olaf for Christmas and he sings ALL the songs. He and my five year old dd do the "love is an open door" duet over and over again. Only they call it "jinx, jinx again"!

Your Ds was treated appallingly and I would complain to tesco if I was you. You son sounds like a treasure!

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thatwouldbeanecumenicalmatter · 22/11/2014 15:23

Poor thing! No boys like/love Frozen equally as much as girls, my two adore it and I'm not going to discourage them! I want and like that my boys enjoy watching cartoons etc with a greater proportion of female leads/characters - it's healthy for them to see female characters who aren't just an 'accessory' (we like Sally Bollywood as well - she rocks!)

I hope he had a good time and enjoys his freebies! Smile

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tortoisesarefab · 22/11/2014 15:23

Ahh, your poor boy. My Ds loves frozen too and gets so excited about anything to do with it. I dread the day he says he doesn't like something because it is for girls

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HermioneWeasley · 22/11/2014 15:26

Everyone loves Frozen. Your DS sounds lovely. He will be thrilled with his Xmas presents

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Hurr1cane · 22/11/2014 15:26

There wasn't that many there yet though to be honest as we were there early, and everyone else was getting chatted to/ getting a crown.

Thanks for making me remember I'm not unreasonable to let him like whatever he likes though Smile

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Hurr1cane · 22/11/2014 15:29

The staff at that particular tesco are usually amazing with my DS, they know his name and they always stop to say hello to him and I've emailed a few times to compliment the staff when they've gone out of their way for him.

I didn't recognise the ones on the frozen event bit but they really were actively ignoring him. I'm not that sensitive in general.

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aermingers · 22/11/2014 15:30

Oh, that's made me feel really sad. My little boy is two and a half and he really likes Frozen too. He goes to a childminders where there are probably slightly more girls than boys and the girls are a little bit older and more traditionally 'girly' things seem to be a bit more prominent there. And my little boy as a result really likes a range of things across the board, he loves cars and Thomas but he also has a dolly and a pushchair and likes Frozen. It just makes me sad that people will try and stop children from doing something they're enjoying and jolt them out of their innocence telling them 'this is not for you' and make them feel bad. Rotters.

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littlejohnnydory · 22/11/2014 15:30

My son saw the film last year and loved it - then sadly a few months later didn't like it because someone at school said it was for girls.

I'd definitely give tesco some 'feedback'. That's an appalling way for staff to treat your son.

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IgnoreMeEveryOtherReindeerDoes · 22/11/2014 15:34

My DS would of loved it but I avoided the event as I suspect it would be mayhem topped with my kind of hell saturday shopping.

Very rude of people and staff towards you DS

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Hurr1cane · 22/11/2014 15:37

Thanks everyone Smile I'll just ignore the whole thing then. As long as I wasn't doing something horribly wrong by talking him.

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LapsedTwentysomething · 22/11/2014 15:39

DS is 2 and loves Frozen. I got him Kristoff and DD Elsa for Christmas, but soon had a change of heart and realised they should both have Elsa. He loves the Ana doll we already have.

YANBU at all.

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Browneyesblue · 22/11/2014 15:43

What a shame!

DS (4yo) loves Frozen, and I took him to Tesco this morning. We went first thing, so he was able to sit down straight away.

At my local store, the children were too surrounded by parents for the costumed staff to really chat, but they did make an effort to praise them for their efforts. DS was the only boy at the time, but he didn't care.

People helped themselves to crowns (not especially girly - blue, with the characters on), and the staff made sure everyone was given a sticker book and piece of cake - including DS.

It's very sad that they had such an odd attitude at your store OP.

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DixieNormas · 22/11/2014 15:44

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