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To not force DS to read

(95 Posts)
Altinkum Fri 21-Nov-14 18:34:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FlipFlippingFlippers Fri 21-Nov-14 18:35:57


Annunziata Fri 21-Nov-14 18:36:10

YABU. He is not allowed to decide that he is not going to do part of his school work. He does it all, and it's okay not to enjoy it as much as doing something else, but this is not exceptional behaviour and you should not encourage it.

yomellamoHelly Fri 21-Nov-14 18:39:58

Personally I'd say you risk putting him off reading and I wouldn't want to do that. Can you approach the books he does read in the same way as you would a reading scheme book? So sharing reading aloud, checking comprehension, understanding of words etc......

Boomtownsurprise Fri 21-Nov-14 18:39:59

Hmm. What work is relevant to the book? By him not reading does this mean he's missing out on class discussion? Writing? Drawing? Drama? All these could be done in context of reading a book.

He needs to distinguish reading for pleasure and work. Presently I think you are BU and not thinking it through. Based on this how do you intend to deal with exams....?

5madthings Fri 21-Nov-14 18:43:14

Yanbu you don't want him to be put off reading,

I just used to write what my children had read so in your case I would put "ds read famous five p5-20" or whatever he has read that day.

My children's school has been fine with this. What is important is that they enjoy reading and read a variety of books/styles of writing.

You don't need 'reading schemes' to learn to read.

DangerousBeanz Fri 21-Nov-14 18:43:14

You aren't being unreasonable.His teacher is. (ex teacher here) It doesn't matter a toss what he's reading so long as he reads. Get him to read 10 pages of any book then question him to check his comprehension, include some q's where he has to infer meaning (read between the lines).
Those scheme books are turgid, I used to get bored listening to kids read them to me.
Oh and make sure he reads some poetry and non-fiction too. Ripleys believe it or not and Guinness book of records were big favourites with the kids I taught.

Yackity Fri 21-Nov-14 18:43:21

I hate to say it, but YABU. Because he will soon start studying books with his class mates. He will need to read them in order to study them, regardless of whether or not he likes them.

Persevering with something that isn't enjoyable is a life skill in itself. I wonder whether he is a very clever boy to who all of his subjects have come relatively easily. He hasn't ever had to really struggle with something.

He should read them, but perhaps just a small amount? Lvl 13 - my DS who is 7 can read quite easily and is about to move up, and he's just catching up with his peers, so I can see why they might be concerned.

Failing getting him interested in the book - get him to read some of it and tell you WHY it's boring. What words are used that seem silly? Why was train your dragon more interesting? So yes, he is reading it, but he can be honest and open about not liking it or thinking its any good, in fact he can go LOOKING for things not to like!

shatteredstudentmum Fri 21-Nov-14 18:43:38

You could be describing my ds. He's y4 and finally level 16 but it took us a full school year to get off level 15 as he hated school books. As long as he was reading I was happy and didn't push. Luckily his new teacher doesn't agree he needs to read every book in a level to move on.

We do school books for reading homework once a week and the rest is whatever he wants, harry potter 3 atm.

BoysiesBack Fri 21-Nov-14 18:43:57


Your DS sounds a lot like mine, a happy, well behaved and bright kid who reads an awful lot anyway.

The important thing is him reading, IMO, schoolbooks are shockingly dull, I've never made my DCs read them tbh, if they choose to fine, otherwise <shrugs>.

ILoveSimonCowell Fri 21-Nov-14 18:50:43

YANBU. My DC at the same age were off school reading scheme books and could read whatever they liked (within reason). All had to be jotted down in reading diary. School said didn't care too much WHAT they were reading, just that they MUST read. Goes without saying that you have to read books you sometimes don't want to/don't interest you or it's not the right time for you to read them. (I had to read to Kill a Mocking Bird for O Level and hated it - passed O level by reading the Pass Notes version of book). Since read properly and loved. Reading is reading. Let them enjoy it.

foslady Fri 21-Nov-14 18:51:13

TANBU - my dd's teacher at that age put them on free readers as even she said the books at that level were awful!

Aeroflotgirl Fri 21-Nov-14 18:53:34

YANBU at all. as long as he's reading, that's the main thing. Just put in his book log, that he read page 1-10 on How to train your dragon for example

MiddleEarthBarbie Fri 21-Nov-14 18:55:00

<sits on fence>

School books for children at that age are awful and apparently designed to put kids off reading.

But, as a pp said, he doesn't get to pick and choose. If he came home and said his maths homework was boring, would you let him off with it?

Altinkum Fri 21-Nov-14 18:56:51

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cheesecakemom Fri 21-Nov-14 18:58:17

So you aren't fussed because you know he can read? Therefore you're happy for him not to do his homework?

DangerousBeanz Fri 21-Nov-14 18:58:41

Oh and if he's on level 13 he is in no way behind, he's doing well.

Annunziata Fri 21-Nov-14 19:00:53

Well he's not doing his work to the best of his ability if he's refusing to do it!

He is throwing a tantrum to get out of his homework, why would you encourage that?

marne2 Fri 21-Nov-14 19:02:07

My dd2 is the same age, I struggle to get her to read her school books, she will read her own books to herself though. I spoke to her teacher this week about it and was told that it doesn't matter what she reads as long as she's understanding what she's reading.

As for Hunger games, I would wait a while, dd1 read them this year at the age of 10 and loves them, she read Harry Potter and enjoyed percy Jackson.

Altinkum Fri 21-Nov-14 19:02:33

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

twizzleship Fri 21-Nov-14 19:06:38

The reason they choose particular books for reading levels is not just for developing the vocabulary but also comprehension skills that are appropriate for his age group. Just because he can read at an advanced level does not mean he is mentally mature - and that shows with comments like He's now refusing to read, as it's pointless and crap and boring, and doubly boring - surely with his reading skills he can finish one of those books in one night if not all of them within days???? There, done and dusted and he doesn't need to worry about the class reading list until the new term. Also how is he going to get the reading grade he deserves if he can't prove to his teachers that he can read what the syllabus expects? It doesn't matter what he's reading at home because he's not being marked/graded on that.

This is not the only time in his school career that he will face a situation like this and he needs to learn to handle it in a reasonable and mature manner - what happens when he gets to secondary school and is expected to read Shakespeare? Is he going throw a tantrum and refuse because 'it's pointless and crap and boring, and doubly boring'?

i was reading John Le Carre books at age 9 but still read the books my teacher gave - always returned the next day with 'can i have another one?' until i'd read all the books considered 'appropriate' for me in the school library...the teacher had no choice but to then let me read the older children's books grin

This is a child who reads the Edith Blythe famous 5 ....It's Enid Blyton smile

MistressDeeCee Fri 21-Nov-14 19:06:43

Id encourage him to read, but not a set figure of 10 pages per night. There's no point, it'll be offputting for him. My DD was the same at that age. I remember her solemnly announcing to me and her dad "I HATE books and don't want to read". I read with her..just short bursts of reading tho. She is at Uni now, so clearly her hate of books at age 8 didnt stunt her education smile. All children are different and learn in different ways but the school system is so rigid here, if your child doesn't tick all the boxes you've had it. Good luck...

MiddleEarthBarbie Fri 21-Nov-14 19:07:28

He's the captain of all his sorting clubs, he's the school councillor, he is the anti bullying campaigner for his school and is also a buddy mentor.

I mean this very nicely, but none of this justifies refusing to do homework. He sounds a responsible, mature boy and it's not a bad thing to learn that in school we sometimes have to do things which we don't particularly enjoy. Of Mice and Men and Lord of the Flies will probably have to be endured in secondary, for example!

grannytomine Fri 21-Nov-14 19:08:28

I think the reading schemes seem to go on forever. When my kids learned to read back in the dark ages they did Ladybird books, I think they went from 1 a to 12 c. Thirty six books and they were done. I can't imagine how many they do now as there seem to be at least 12 on each level at my DGSs school so 12 times 16 so 196 books.

If he is reading level 13 he is reading well for his age and as long as he is reading he will be fine. My DGS was like this last year in year 4. His father went to see his teacher and asked for him to come off the scheme, school said no. He asked for his reading to be assessed and it came back as geing at a level where he should be free reading. He never read another reading scheme book but he reads loads and loves books.

I think reading text books or set books in English is different, reading scheme books are for them to learn how to read, if they can read they don't need them.

MonoNoAware Fri 21-Nov-14 19:08:38

I would want to find out exactly what the purpose of the reading scheme books are, and if there is any other way to achieve the same ends by different means (eg choosing his own books)

Yes, sometimes we have to push through and do stuff we don't like in life, but only when there is some benefit to us in doing it. Otherwise it is a pointless waste of time.

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