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Not to buy my childrens' Christmas card designs because they're rubbish?

(67 Posts)
jenster1976 Wed 19-Nov-14 20:28:43

Honestly, they are normally really good at drawing and do me lovely pictures, but these are misspelt, scribbled in places and messy. I was really looking forward to getting them, this is the first year the school has done this fundraiser - I've seen loads of friends and families with them, always cute, but my kids are, to be frank, embarrassing! Also, I want to tell them, but is that just cruel? They're 7 and 5.

Yanbu to not buy them, but I wouldn't let them know it was because I thought they weren't up to scratch, personally.

ashtrayheart Wed 19-Nov-14 20:38:10

I just don't do them in the first place, we get given the blank templates for them to draw on (or not) I'm not paying £5 for 10 cards!

Selinasupreme Wed 19-Nov-14 20:41:02

Don't tell them their drawings are rubbish. I think YABU.

Bartlebee Wed 19-Nov-14 20:41:12

Mine are a bit older, but would always do endearingly rubbish Christmas cards for me to buy.

Then I'd get my friends' children's' little works of art!

Discopanda Wed 19-Nov-14 20:42:28

YANBU that's a lot of money, even for charity cards!

Leeds2 Wed 19-Nov-14 20:44:10

I wouldn't buy them, but I wouldn't tell them that is was because their cards weren't good enough.

bodhranbae Wed 19-Nov-14 20:47:34

You want to tell very young children that their pictures are shit? confused

TheAlias Wed 19-Nov-14 20:47:59

I think there are lots of reasons not to buy them if you don't want to but considering your DCs work to be "embarrassing" is really sad.

jenster1976 Wed 19-Nov-14 20:54:00

Ok, I'm clearly mean and won't tell them, but they're going to ask me why...I'm not convinced that my 7 year old couldn't cope with me telling her she should be able to spell Christmas. I know she can, I just think she couldn't be arsed...

CrapBag Wed 19-Nov-14 20:54:35

YABU. They are young ffs. And no you cant tell them you think their work is crap.

And I don't think 50p a card is a lot of money, especially when it is going towards something. I am paying £1 a card for DDs from nursery.

I love buying my children's work like this because DS would be gutted if I didn't, plus he does put a lot of effort into it. I like to keep it for when they are older and their GPs like receiving them.

TheAlias Wed 19-Nov-14 20:56:18

I'd agree with you CrapBag but the schools only actually receive a small % of that £1/50p

IdkickJilliansass Wed 19-Nov-14 20:56:40

I kept the originals but didnt buy the cards as they are way overpriced, I used to before I became poorgrin

EveDallasRetd Wed 19-Nov-14 21:00:50

Do you have the option for gift tags instead? That's what I'm doing (and for the same reasons as you - I too am an awful parent). I've told DD that I'd already ordered the Rescue charity ones we always buy though, so she doesn't know.

Another friend has refused to buy her DD's cards, but told her straight that it was because she'd not taken any care with them, and because she was embarassed that her 9 year old spelled Christmas wrong. She is pretty blunt with her kids though - they are used to it.

jenster1976 Wed 19-Nov-14 21:01:13

It's not the money, but I wouldn't really want to give them to anyone as they are in way representative of what my children are capable of, honestly they're normally mini Picassos who can spell! I sound like a tiger mother don't I, this is not me normally!

CrapBag Wed 19-Nov-14 21:11:50

I do think you are a little hung up on the fact that they aren't 'perfect'. Will GPs etc really care?

My DS made a card for his friend a while ago, I advised him on where to draw what he was drawing but he didn't listen and bunched it altogether so you could barely see it. I went on explained that he hadn't listened and you couldn't see what he had drawn. He was devastated and refused to give his friend the card (although I did convince him in the end).

I have never felt so bad. I was disgusted with myself. Apologised profusely but he was still so upset. I learnt that is was MY problem with things having to be good and perfect and I will never make that mistake again. At the time he said he would never make a card again but hopefully he has forgotten as he is going loads of drawing lately.

I always praise his work and recognise the effort. Its possible the spelling is an unfortunate mistake rather than your DD not being bothered.

SaucyJack Wed 19-Nov-14 21:15:39

YABU not to buy them because you think they're crap and you can't use them to show- off the the recipients.

YANBU not to buy them generally tho. They are eye-wateringly expensive and raise very very little for the school.

Not to mention I think the guilt trip is despicable.

shimmeringinthesun Wed 19-Nov-14 21:18:27

Just slightly off topic here but years and years ago I worked in a school where, one day the photographer came to take all the children's photographs.
One particular boy in my class had his taken with his little brother, and asked everyday when they would arrive. When the finally did he raced home to show his mum.
The following day he came into class, head down, wobbly lipped. He dropped the photos back on the desk and muttered 'me mam don't want 'em' . He looked so unhappy and dejected.

I've never forgotten that, and probably neither has he.

Be proud of your DC's op, they did the best they could do at that moment, and probably enjoyed it immensely. don't destroy those memories, cherish them.


BarbarianMum Wed 19-Nov-14 21:22:42


I would (and do) buy my dcs' offerings, regardless of quality, if they represent a good effort on their part. If they just dash something off in 5 minutes l refuse to pay for it and tell them why "Its not really your best work, is it?" type response. Then offer them to draw a new card for granny.

Dawndonnaagain Wed 19-Nov-14 21:24:24

I had a mother quick to criticise. Nothing I did was ever as good as anything she did. She never turned up to a sportsday, nativity etc. She did school concerts when I was older to bask in the reflected glory (I could/can sing). She turned up to my graduation, but only because John Ogden was playing. She took photos but I later found out there was no film in the camera. I don't speak to her now. Neither do three out of my four siblings. Don't tell them they're rubbish, please. Just buy a pack and put them away for when they're older.

drbonnieblossman Wed 19-Nov-14 21:27:16

Buy them - tell your dc it's the first and last time.

So what if they aren't to the usual Picasso standard. Your children did them. There will be plenty of opportunities in the future to express your disappointment when they show you up. This really really isn't one of them.

Starlightbright1 Wed 19-Nov-14 21:31:53

The cards I use to send to special Family so while not cheap as everyday cards for people that would have named cards not so.

I also find it a bit shocking and sad you want to tell them there pictures are crap. Poor kids

lemisscared Wed 19-Nov-14 21:31:57

You sound a lot like my mother, nothing was ever good enough. It totally destroyed my self esteem.

waithorse Wed 19-Nov-14 21:32:35

YABU. I buy everything. I couldn't knock my dc"s confidence by telling them there work is rubbish.

Starlightbright1 Wed 19-Nov-14 21:34:09

Can I also add in my son's school they have spent hours and hours over these cards ... Can you imagine been told your hours of work are crap

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