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is this relevant or irrelevant?

(12 Posts)
MissWing Tue 18-Nov-14 21:52:25

My DH's grandmother died earlier this year. His parents told him he would be getting some money, they couldn't initially say how much. Knowing that we were in the midst of a spiralling building project they offered to give us the money before the funds came through. It was a really welcome offer. They have transferred 12,000 big ones into our bank account in two installments. Frankly it made a massive difference.

Here's my issue: I Don' t know whether the money was left to DH by his grandmother or whether his parents shared their inheritance. I asked DH and if he was told he's since forgotten. I feel like it's important for us to know to whom we should address our thanks for this kindness. DH is vaguely reluctant to ask. He would if I pressed the issue, but I don't think he sees anything unresolved here. There's nothing big at stake, we have a super relationship with DHs parents and they have shown huge kindness and generosity to us always. Equally we (mostly DH obvs) have very fond memories of his grandmother.

Is this point about the inheritance relevant or irrelevant?

ShiftyFades Tue 18-Nov-14 21:56:33

It's relevant for tax purposes if her estate was over £325k

WinterKisses Tue 18-Nov-14 21:56:40

Irrelevant, if they have transferred some of their inheritance they done it because they wanted to see you enjoy the money. Lovely from both sides.

I'm sorry for your loss.

ShiftyFades Tue 18-Nov-14 21:57:31

But on a personal level I wouldn't push the issue xx

TeaForTara Tue 18-Nov-14 21:57:35

If it doesn't matter to your DH, why does it matter so much to you?

ShiftyFades Tue 18-Nov-14 21:58:48

Blooming phone!

I would just enjoy their help, I am sorry for your loss xx

Sorry for all the short posts too x

Spinaroo Tue 18-Nov-14 22:00:25

Not important. Direct your thanks to them as the money they at least initially gave you came from them. They may clear it up for you but if they don't, I really don't think it matters.

MissWing Tue 18-Nov-14 22:01:47

Thank you for your kind messages.
Shifty, no it would have been well below this amount.

MissWing Tue 18-Nov-14 22:07:13

You're all saying it doesn't matter. Which I can see.
Thanks again.

puntasticusername Tue 18-Nov-14 22:25:09

I think you're lovely to be thinking about it, and to be so conscientious about making sure your thanks get to the right place, but - as others have said, if your DH is happy that he has thanked his family enough, that's probably fine.

Maybe when you move in after the renovations are complete you could ask his parents round so you can crack open a bottle of something nice and fizzy, and raise a toast "to everyone who made this possible"?

MissWing Tue 18-Nov-14 22:28:46

Thanks, Punta. The toast is a super idea.
My PIL stayed last week and helped me apply 4 coats of strong brilliant white to the walls. That's definitely making it possible!!

Hatespiders Tue 18-Nov-14 22:45:29

Anyone is entitled to have a copy of any Will, for a small fee (about £10). If you look up the relevant Records Office for your area, you'll see what to do. That way you'll be able to view the exact amount left to you by your DH's grandmother. Also, the Executors of the will are listed there, and you'll know who was responsible for transferring the money to you.

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