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Muslim mums at our school don't mix with non-Muslim mums

(220 Posts)
Vanillacrescents Tue 18-Nov-14 10:24:22

There are a large number of mums wearing headscarves who are obviously Muslim at our school. They only talk to each other. Whenever I greet these mums, they don't greet back but prefer to talk to each other. In fact they look the other way. The other day I was first at the school gate and a younger Muslim mum was also waiting. I managed to have a friendly chat with her but the minute another Muslim mum arrived they only acknowledged each other talking in their own language and blanked me.

Yesterday ds fell off his scooter because he tried not to collide with one of these mums as she wasn't paying attention, looking away waving at her friends. Ds fell over and landed in front of her feet. He scraped his knee and started crying however this woman didn't say a word to him or smile at him.
I helped ds up right in front of her and still not a kind word or smile. Instead she gave me a really dirty look and tried to stare me down. I just don't get this attitude and feel it is unpleasant and segregating. I will always greet people regardless of their race, religion, taste in clothes or whatever and treat them with basic respect and be polite. It almost feels like these mums look down on everyone who isn't part of their community.

grocklebox Tue 18-Nov-14 10:26:41

and your aibu is....?

Vanillacrescents Tue 18-Nov-14 10:28:50

Aibu to find this attitude unpleasant and unnecessary.

ilovesooty Tue 18-Nov-14 10:29:03

I can't see this ending well.

Vanillacrescents Tue 18-Nov-14 10:30:38

Why? ilove I don't get it.

Hurr1cane Tue 18-Nov-14 10:31:02

How do you know they're Muslims though? There are other religions that wear head scarves and other reasons for wearing them that aren't even religious.

Either way if they are unpleasant it'll be everything to do with the usual clique mentality that some people have and nothing to do with religion.

Idontseeanysontarans Tue 18-Nov-14 10:31:35

Grockle I think the AIBU is "AIBU to turn one incident with one particularly rude woman into a rant about people different to me"

26Point2Miles Tue 18-Nov-14 10:31:46

yanbu....but if its happening why cant the op discuss it?

AttitcusFinchIsMyFather Tue 18-Nov-14 10:32:00

Maybe they can sense your racism and want nothing to do with it.

Hurr1cane Tue 18-Nov-14 10:32:32

Also, if I lived in a country where the majority didn't speak my native language, I think I would naturally gravitate towards those who do as conversations would be less work for me. Wouldn't you?

Vanillacrescents Tue 18-Nov-14 10:32:45

I'm prepared to be told I bu because at his point I think these mums are bu.
I appreciate that it doesn't matter in the greater scheme of things.

SolomanDaisy Tue 18-Nov-14 10:33:01

Well she was probably a bit pissed off that you were letting your DS ride a scooter at her and expecting her to move out of the way.

MsAspreyDiamonds Tue 18-Nov-14 10:33:17

Interesting username.....

AttitcusFinchIsMyFather Tue 18-Nov-14 10:33:20

There are a group of mums at our school who are just like this ... but don't wear headscarves! Hmmm, what of that?

Hairtodaygonetomorrow Tue 18-Nov-14 10:33:55

The mums at our school who wear headscarves are very chatty. Perhaps it is a bit cliquey at your school- why do you assume it is the same everywhere?

specialsubject Tue 18-Nov-14 10:34:15

children shouldn't be scooting in crowded places.

ClawHandsIfYouBelieveInFreaks Tue 18-Nov-14 10:35:34

The Muslim Mothers at my DC school are very friendly and mix well with us non Muslims. So I think what you have there OP is a generic clique...regardless of religion.

Vanillacrescents Tue 18-Nov-14 10:35:41

Ohhhhhh fgs. I am not racist smile. I said in op that I treat every individual with respect, however I sense a massive clique mentality from these mums purely based on whether someone is part of their community or not. It find it baffling.

26Point2Miles Tue 18-Nov-14 10:35:51

fully agree about the scooters,they are a menace.

SaucyJack Tue 18-Nov-14 10:36:11

I don't understand why it's a big problem for you. I think it's perfectly natural for people to want to mix with others who share their language and culture.

They don't have to ingratiate themselves to you just because your family was here first.

ginnycreeper5 Tue 18-Nov-14 10:36:19

Vanilla, I agree with you. I don't understand why some groups of society feel the need to actively segregate themselves. How are we supposed to all get on if there is an invisible wall in place? There's no need for their behaviour - especially when you are going out of your way to be friendly.
You sound like a nice person.

But, agree this won't end well.
You will get flamed. (the shitstirrers love a thread like this)

Back2Two Tue 18-Nov-14 10:36:22

YA of course being totally U.

And making massive assumptions

"It almost feels like these mums look down on everyone who isn't part of their community."

Vanillacrescents Tue 18-Nov-14 10:36:28

children shouldn't be scooting in crowded places.
It wasn't particularly crowded.

AttitcusFinchIsMyFather Tue 18-Nov-14 10:36:55

So, people don't gravitate to those most similar to themselves, ever?

Hurr1cane Tue 18-Nov-14 10:37:00

Attitcus, they're probably undercover Muslims who have come out without their headscarves to make us English folk look bad...

I don't even understand why people notice these things about people. Most days I'm so busy that I wouldn't notice if someone was wearing a bloody jesters hat.

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