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Okay, I'm old! Government poo test on way!

47 replies

FoxgloveFairy · 17/11/2014 16:06

Recently turned 50. Today I got a letter from the government to tell me that an easy to use poo test is on its way to see if I have cancer of the bum. I appreciate the Government's concern, obviously, but how damn depressing!

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ShakeYourTailFeathers · 17/11/2014 16:09

DH and I did one a couple of years ago (i'm not even 40 yet but Ddad died of bowel cancer.)... much hilarity was had discussing the day's poo events Grin

First catch your poo....

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FoxgloveFairy · 17/11/2014 16:14

Oh God! They start to run away like some crazed Mr. Hanky from South Park? Noone warns you about these things!

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raltheraffe · 17/11/2014 16:17

Although it is not the most pleasant test to do there is a lot of evidenced based medicine that this form of screening saves lives. Depressing to be old, but more depressing to be old and having cancer.

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tiredgranny · 17/11/2014 16:21

in our health area when u turn 55 u have the joys of bowel cancer scoop

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FoxgloveFairy · 17/11/2014 16:22

True enough. Luckily, very little family history of cancer of any kind. Doesn't mean it can't happen of course.

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Shockers · 17/11/2014 16:23

Can the under 50s access this test?

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LaurieFairyCake · 17/11/2014 16:30

Nice Hmm

I hate being reminded of ageing, I'd have a right stramash at that letter

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ghostyslovesheep · 17/11/2014 16:48

it'll be titty squashing next

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Pipbin · 17/11/2014 16:53

Now I find peeing in a tiny pot hard enough, but pooing?

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raltheraffe · 17/11/2014 16:56

Shockers I doubt an under 50 could access the screening programme. When the Government comes out with these programmes they look at the relative risks involved at each age and work out what is cost effective and what isn't. The risk of bowel cancer gets far higher with age so it probably is not cost effective doing in for younger people. Likewise with mammograms it is not cost effective routinely doing them in younger ladies because the risk is lower and the breast tissue is denser so the scans are far less reliable.
Some people have a genetic tendency to bowel cancer. These people get intense screening from a young age.
If anyone has concerns that they have CR cancer (blood in poo or change in bowel habit) they should see their GP who will fully investigate and refer to a specialist if they feel further tests are needed.
Another problem with the poo testing is there are false +ves. The test is to look for blood in poo so if someone has eaten a lot of red meat you can get a false +ve in it.

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quietbatperson · 17/11/2014 17:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

weaselwords · 17/11/2014 17:19

I'm only 47 and have been asked in to have my boob squished. I'm not impressed.

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HappyAgainOneDay · 17/11/2014 17:21

Pipbin You don't put it into a pot. You catch a few bits separately each day, using a bit of plastic, and take a smear from each lump. Seal each smear into a little pouch and post the pouches back. It's not invasive and not intrusive and certainly not painful.

In my book, it's another plus point for the National Health Service. We should think ourselves lucky.

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Summerisle1 · 17/11/2014 17:23

It's hilariously embarrassing but for all that, do the test.

DH threw his away. 5 years later he is now minus most of his insides, completely "replumbed" and so radioactive that he glows in the dark. Truly, it is one of the most effective screening tests for bowel cancer which is almost completely curable if caught early. Much easier to scrape a bit of poo on a stick than it is to discover that one day, your bottom explodes and you discover you have Stage 4 bowel cancer.

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quietbatperson · 17/11/2014 17:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

amothersplaceisinthewrong · 17/11/2014 17:27

I am 54 and have not been called for this yet. The idea of pouches being posted is a bit yeuch!

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Floisme · 17/11/2014 17:29

I ended up having a camera up my arse - not a lot of fun but they found and removed something pre-nasterous. No history of bowel cancer in my family.
I agree with Happy 100%.

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Floisme · 17/11/2014 17:30

And Flowers for Summerisle1

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springlamb · 17/11/2014 17:37

I'm 47 and just got called up randomly by East Kent to go to the titty squashing portakabin next to Frankie & Benny's.
It was ok, we listened to a bit of Vivaldi, did the business and off I went. Apparently, my chest is in very good shape with lots of 'granular tissue' left, whatevertheferk that is.
I had a letter this morning to say all was well and they'd call me again when I was 50. How ridiculous, it's 1983 and me being 50 is like, well, in the next millennium, and we all know our VCRs are gonna take over the world long before that.
If they send me a poo pot (now I've shown willing), I shall send it back full.

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Andrewofgg · 17/11/2014 17:40

Got mine at 60 and again at 62 and I am appreciative.

Can't help thinking of the poor buggers who deal with it. What a way to earn a living.

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Summerisle1 · 17/11/2014 17:44

Flowers much appreciated and thank you.

What I would say is that at least my DH is alive still. But it has been a very, very close call and I really wouldn't want anyone else to be told (twice) that they have a life expectancy of a very few months without drastic treatment. Not when there's a simple test that is so effective.

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NUFC69 · 17/11/2014 17:44

As I am way over 60 I have had to do several of these: they send them every two years, I think. Be warned, I have had problems at least twice so they send you another kit. That was clear, but just to be sure they send a further one! Well worth the effort, though.

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Shockers · 17/11/2014 17:58

I only ask because I've only got 18 months to go, but I've had a bit of unusual activity in that dept.

After reading Summerisle's post, I think I'll make an appointment.

Flowers for you and your DH Summerisle.

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Archiesnan · 17/11/2014 17:59

They picked my mil cancer up after doing this test. It was early stage and after surgery she was all clear. We are very grateful the nhs send these tests out.

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springlamb · 17/11/2014 18:14

Quite amazing what you get used to (and end up grateful for).

DD (13) is still reeling in disbelief that at some point in my life I have allowed a doctor to stick a metal speculum up my wotsit for a smear test, and is aghast that midwives put their gloved hands up there during labour. Mind you, she was mildly offended at having the cervical immunisation recently, why would you sign the form Mum how embarrassing.

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