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To want to plan dc number 2 around my job?

(6 Posts)
LokiBear Sun 16-Nov-14 19:26:19

DH and I have a dd who is 3. We agreed that when my contraceptive implant runs out (sept 2015) I wont replace it and we will try for another baby. I don't want to start trying straight away as I do not want to have a baby before July due to my job. I'm a teacher, currently teaching my first GCSE group (I've been teaching for 10 years but the school has changed its age range) and, for my professional development, I need to see my first class through to the end of the course. Falling pregnant next September would mean a June baby. I would have to conduct the exam whilst heavily pregnant (practical subject) or pass my poor pupils off to a mat cover teacher. I do not want to do that. I want to see them through and aim for an August baby. DH is humpy with me because I want to wait a few more months. He is annoyed that I am putting my job first. I'm annoyed because why shouldn't I? It's my career. I've worked bloody hard to get to where I am today. I am the primary earner for our family, I need to consider my job. Once I have my first set of exam results under my belt I will be able to take mat leave without worrying. It is also my body. I know what I am capable of doing whilst heavily pregnant because I've been pregnant before. I only want to wait 2/3 months longer than he does. I realise I may not fall pregnant straight away but I did with dd so would rather not risk it. He is upset because he is desperate for another baby and has no control over when we have one. He is a lovely dh and a wonderful dad. I feel conflicted, half of me feels bad for him because he has very little choice as to when he gets to have another baby. The other half thinks he is a bit shit for making me feel this way and should consider how much pressure he is putting me under to have another baby. I'm annoyed because he doesn't realise the massive impact it will have on my body and my life. Aibu or is he?

peppapigonaloop Sun 16-Nov-14 19:28:54

I think yanbu..all of your reasons for waiting make sense and yes it might take a while to fall pregnant but equally could happen straight away and at the worst time for your job. If I were you I would stick to my guns on this!

redexpat Sun 16-Nov-14 19:45:54

YANBU. I planned DC2 around my placement so that I could take a year off my course afterwards and come back at a suitable time.

Perhaps suggest that you can get a good 3 months of practice in? wink

Purplepoodle Sun 16-Nov-14 19:58:01

September babies are brilliant. All kids back at school, you can go out and about without hordes of children being around. Plus they are the oldest in school year which gives then a small advantage. It was awful sending my summer babies to school as they felt like babies, where my sept baby was more than ready

LokiBear Sun 16-Nov-14 20:11:37

Thanks for the replies. I think I knew I wasn't being unreasonable. I don't think I'm going to convince DH though so will have to suffer his grumpy-ness and stand my ground.

sleepdodger Sun 16-Nov-14 20:22:54

We've tried to be clever like that
We waited
I'm still not pregnanthmm
Was pg with dc1 v fast
Go with it and good luck

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