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To not know what to do about dd being bullied?

(8 Posts)
fabricfreeshiner Fri 14-Nov-14 15:22:42

DD has been bullied in the past she's now 14 and I was so pleased when she met a new group of friends. Shes highly intelligent but slightly shy, so I was surprised when I saw their snapchat which was something like this

DD Friend: Luv ya youre my bessie mate
DD: Luv ya too

etc It's not how dd has ever spoken before but it seems her whole group of friends spend alot of time talking like this and "dissing" those not in their crowd. It's all blown up in her face though ,she's said to one not of the gang about DD Friend Luv that girl, we are dead close" This girl has told everyone called her a lesbian and started rumours.

DD doesn't seem to care, she says they all talk like that every single one of them, alot of the others go on sleepovers and sleep in the same beds and stuff (not doing anything obviously) snog each other and take loads of selfies hugging kissing etc. DD is far more reserved and won't join in any of that behaviour (thank god!). Her friends are standing by her, laughing it off, and calling this other girl jealous, but I am worried that because of being bullied in the past it's going to affect her.

Any suggestions?

SophiaPetrillo Fri 14-Nov-14 15:25:24

I don't get what your problem is. Your DD has a new friendship group and is secure enough within it to not join in some of their tactile behaviour that she isn't particularly comfortable with, although even if she did, I fail to understand why you are "thanking god" that she doesn't. Leave her be, she sounds like she's a lot more clued up than you are.

fabricfreeshiner Fri 14-Nov-14 15:26:21

Because she's sensitive sophia, and should it blow up in her face I don't know how she will take it!

SophiaPetrillo Fri 14-Nov-14 15:29:19

Any friendship group can "blow up", it's part of life to learn how to resolve conflict. All you can do if your DD has a problem (any problem, not just this POTENTIAL one) is be supportive and a soft place to fall. Worrying about what MIGHT happen and chipping in with your tuppenceworth will undermine her self belief that she can manage her own relationships. Seriously, leave her alone.

fabricfreeshiner Fri 14-Nov-14 15:39:03

I get what you are saying. I will back off and stop worrying.....

Ok not stop worrying I'll back off wink

SophiaPetrillo Fri 14-Nov-14 15:41:52

There you go sweetheart. Sorry if I sound a bit harsh, but the worst and I mean the WORST thing you can do is get involved in the nonsense and rubbish they write to each other via Snapchat or Instagram or whatever else they communicate IF they appear to be happy and holding their own. I'm pleased your DD is still able to be true to herself within her group and that she is being supported by them. Re-read your OP, you will find there are more positives than negatives in there. Good luck.

fabricfreeshiner Fri 14-Nov-14 15:43:53

NO IWBU thanks for giving me some sense! Thanks sophia xxxx

SophiaPetrillo Fri 14-Nov-14 15:45:39

You're very welcome. Have a good weekend xxxx

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