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To not want this pile of nauseating drivel that passes for an email from Boden?

(59 Posts)
LiegeAndLief Wed 12-Nov-14 09:19:55

I have just made my first Boden order and received an email acknowledging it. To quote directly:

Thanks for placing an order with us. You've made us happier than all our favourite things: tea, dogs, crumpets and bank holidays.

There is a fair amount more perky twee crap in a similar vein. A further missive suggests that if I do not dance around my living room with joy upon receiving my order, I should return it for a full refund.

I am a grown woman. I would like an email saying "Thank you for your order. Your order number is xxxx. Our returns policy is blah blah blah."

Am I being utterly curmudgeonly? Does this kind of thing actually make other people feel warm and happy and it's just me who's missing part of their soul?

I expect to be told that this is my own fault for ordering something from Boden - the only defence I can put forward is that it was a winter coat for my dc in the sale.

Poledra Wed 12-Nov-14 09:25:38

Totally on your side with this one. However, the only way I can make myself feel better is by being superior and looking down my nose at this twee tripe whilst acknowledging that I do like their kids clothes

NorwaySpruce Wed 12-Nov-14 09:28:08

Well you've bought into it now.

It starts off with a coat in the sale and being grumpy at wanky emails.

Then they send you a voucher that's really good value, so you order one more thing, and raise a wry smile at the email.

Then you need a wooly jumper for autumn walks in the woods.

You have a quick look to see if Boden have anything cheap(ish), are overjoyed to find funky tights, cord skirts, and ponchos with tassels, and look forward to the wanky email.

Because they love you, and know just what you want, and you are part of the Boden set now.

When the things arrive you do the dance of joy, and are pretty much fucked from then on.

JustAShopGirl Wed 12-Nov-14 09:30:33

haha - NorwaySpruce - you just described my sister's "conversion" right down to the poncho!!

cattypussclaw Wed 12-Nov-14 09:30:59

I kind of like their emails [ashamed face]

They make a change from the usual and they usually make me smile. They sent me one parcel with "Kiss your postman, your Boden parcel has arrived" printed all over it. Postie pretty much lobbed the parcel from the bottom of the drive!

It is all a bit twee and trying-too-hard but I think I prefer that to not-trying-at-all.

IMHO obv.

SaucyJackOLantern Wed 12-Nov-14 09:46:29

I'm getting my dander up just from reading your OP.

arethereanyleftatall Wed 12-Nov-14 09:49:59

I like their emails too. And Abel & Coles, which are similar. Makes me smile.

minipie Wed 12-Nov-14 09:53:01

YANBU. I got the same email and had the same grumpy thoughts.

I actually think the email could alienate quite a few of their customers. For example, me: I really don't think of myself as a dogs/tea/crumpets kind of person - I buy Boden (kids) despite its image not because of its image iyswim. So putting all that in the email just reminds me that Boden is a bit too twee for me.

Whippet81 Wed 12-Nov-14 10:37:17

Well I like twee grin

UncleSue Wed 12-Nov-14 10:41:35

I like them, a bit different from the norm.

Sheitgeist Wed 12-Nov-14 10:51:05

I think I'm going to be sick.

seasalt Wed 12-Nov-14 10:54:32

You should shop at Debenhams, got an email today saying "Hello, Beautiful" grin

bigkidsdidit Wed 12-Nov-14 10:56:29

I HATE Boden emails. I cringe readjng them. But then I am a grumpy old cow smile

Allstoppedup Wed 12-Nov-14 11:07:06

I Initially cringed a little but then actually felt a flutter of excitement and when my order arrived I got free gifts with it. I'm stuck between feeling like a victim of horribly contrived, twee marketing and being utterly charmed by them...

goindowntoyasgursfarm Wed 12-Nov-14 11:13:29

YY. Virgin Mobile, big red letters: "Hello you."

Fuck off, you.

ThrowAChickenInTheAir Wed 12-Nov-14 11:15:54

I've just received a rollerblind bearing the legend 'Hooray your stuff has arrived. We hope you [heart symbol] it'

Yes me too. Or there will be [punch on nose symbol] considering how long it took to arrive hmm.

juneybean Wed 12-Nov-14 11:19:22

See I got the Debenhams one also saying hello beautiful and promptly said fuck off under my breath and deleted it without opening it.

FruitBasedDrinkForALady Wed 12-Nov-14 11:20:28

Firebox are in on the act too, very quirky and hip...

Greyhound Wed 12-Nov-14 11:22:28

That would irritate me too.

I ordered some items from a guy who ran a small online business. It was weird, because he then started sending me personal emails.

It started off asking for ideas about what I would like him to stock and then they got a bit odd. I started to ignore them and then he emailed me asking whether I was alright!

I blocked him and unsubscribed from his email. Weird.

MorrisZapp Wed 12-Nov-14 11:26:41

I think it's quite cute to be honest. Makes a change from the norm. Their parcels are a pleasure to receive, all bright and happy like.

Sternin Wed 12-Nov-14 11:27:22

YANBU. This kind of thing was a novelty back in the day when Innocent Smoothies first got popular, but nowadays being all cute and informal is a fairly common (and irritating!) marketing strategy, I find. Some companies can pull it off because they don't go OTT with it. The worst one I've come across is Treaclemoon...
www.treaclemoon.net/about_treacle_moon.html

CaptainJaneSafeway Wed 12-Nov-14 11:28:45

I loathe this kind of marketing style.

You've made us happier than all our favourite things: tea, dogs, crumpets and bank holidays. BOOOOAAAAAKKKK

I have a family member who writes a blog that is full of this kind of crap, I can't bear it.

However I do use Boden as they have a few bits that I really like, and for kids clothes. They have good customer service and returns policy and send you vouvhers. But fear not, being a Boden customer who hates a lot about Boden (the sappy emails, the sexist catalogues, the cringeworthy messages from "Johnnie") is very common, there's a whole army of us. Loving to hate the worst excesses of Boden is a very enjoyable MN pastime, in fact it should have its own topic!

CaptainJaneSafeway Wed 12-Nov-14 11:34:46

Urgh at that Treaclemoon site.

I think less so with Boden as it's a big and established company, but with some of the smaller ones it makes me feel like it's all a cover and their head office is probably really grim and exploitative.

"We are a just a happy bunch of fun types who are passionate about bringing you moments of joy" etc and you can just imagine the boss is a twat who's shagging the temp and pays everyone late and they all hate each other's guts. Or is that just me?

I once read on an innocent smoothie bottle something like "Contact us at blah blah address, we'd be thrilled to hear from you. Or why not just pop in, we love visitors!"

I thought, can you imagine if I just popped in saying "Hi, you all sound so nice, will you be my friends? They'd be like "SECURITY!"

ScarletFever Wed 12-Nov-14 11:37:02

"I once read on an innocent smoothie bottle something like "Contact us at blah blah address, we'd be thrilled to hear from you. Or why not just pop in, we love visitors!"

i wonder if anyone has actually been round?

Hoppinggreen Wed 12-Nov-14 11:41:20

What you need to so is spend £hundreds for a couple of seasons and then just stop dead because you have had enough of their over priced twee clothes.
Then you will get a series of PA emails from their marketing team. If you ignore these you will get a " jolly" email from Johnny Boden himself. If you continue to ignore him he will send you discount vouchers with pleading emails.
If you continue to ignore these he will send you increasingly sad emails suggesting you have ruined his life and possibly a free hat.
Then when you have for him on the ropes but one cheap(ish) item to get his hopes up before ignoring him again.
It's cruel I know but much more amusing than their " hilarious" emails and pictures of dogs they send

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