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to buy something else for the mum-to-be despite her specifying clothing only?

(20 Posts)
Flingmoo Mon 10-Nov-14 15:38:27

Have been invited to baby shower and mum-to-be has specified clothing only as gifts...

Perhaps she meant this in a nice way so people didn't feel obliged to buy other, more expensive gifts. However, becoming a new mum myself recently, I can think of loads more useful things than clothes. IMHO she'll probably end up with a big pile of baby clothes which won't all get worn, and likely won't remember which friend each clothing gift was from.

WIBU to gift something completely different but useful or thoughtful or maybe just silly e.g. nipple cream, muslins, baby toys, snacks for mum etc?

Sallygoroundthemoon Mon 10-Nov-14 15:41:03

YABU. She has asked for clothes only so best to respect her wishes rather than get her what you think she wants.

PourquoiTuGachesTaVie Mon 10-Nov-14 15:43:29

Just don't buy 0-3 size clothes, she'll be swamped with that size. I'd buy 3-6 month size or bigger.

AlpacaLypse Mon 10-Nov-14 15:44:23

Last one I went to, the baby was due in Spring. So I bought an age six/nine months snowsuit ready for winter, on the grounds that nobody ever uses all the newborn stuff they get given.

iwantkhaleesiseyebrows Mon 10-Nov-14 15:44:56

YANBU. Personally I think it's rude to specify any gift. IMHO a gift is a gift- something chosen by the giver.

I actually have a bugbear about baby showers anyway (I suffered a late pregnancy loss so I'm sure some will blame it on 'my issues' but I also hate gift list type things on general).

You sound like a very thoughtful friend I think she's lucky to have you.

Waltermittythesequel Mon 10-Nov-14 15:46:06

YABU because her list is not ridiculous or OTT or anything.

Just get her what she asked for!

TracyBarlow Mon 10-Nov-14 15:47:41

Won't she have all the stuff you mention. I'd get her some cute pyjamas for the baby in age 12-18 months. You can't go wrong with them really.

500Decibels Mon 10-Nov-14 15:47:45

Go with what she wants. She may already have all that stuff or someone else may be buying it for her.
Id also avoid 0-3 months.

Chunderella Mon 10-Nov-14 15:52:12

Yabu. It's good that you're being considerate enough to realise she'll likely be swamped with more newborn clothes than she'll use, but the solution to that is to buy things for older babies, as others have said. Muslins sort of qualify as clothes I guess, since they're similar to bibs, so you could get away with a packet of those too. If you want a practical clothing gift, lots of bibs and vests. Otherwise, definitely nothing on your list. She may not want to bf and even if she does, some people would think nipple cream was a bit personal. So that's inappropriate. You don't know what she'll want to eat either. Just get what she's asked for.

LadyLuck10 Mon 10-Nov-14 15:52:34

I also think yabu. Snacks for the mum and nipple cream is something she would want to choose herself and is a bit too personal. Stick to what she asked.

Why not just get her what she wants? She might have got all the useful stuff already, I know I spent endless hours researching it all when I was pregnant and friends told me what was useful so I could get it all organised.

I was given masses of clothes when DC1 was born and I was very grateful and did remember who gave what (I wrote it all down in a book). Other stuff I preferred to choose for myself, so that was fine. There were a few things that ended up being wrong season though.

AesSedai Mon 10-Nov-14 15:56:54

She might not want nipple cream.........especially if she is bottle feeding hmm

TondelayoSchwarzkopf Mon 10-Nov-14 15:58:03

Nipple cream? confused YABVU

Get her 6-9 month old clothes - that's when you really need them

ThinkIveBeenHacked Mon 10-Nov-14 15:58:32

Go for clothes. Buy up. Id get some sleepsuits.from.Next in 9-12 months.

I had a baby three weeks ago and am inundated with stuff up to six months. Ive just been and swapped a bunch for much bigger sizes so that everything gets worn plenty.

Mammanat222 Mon 10-Nov-14 15:59:30

This is why I loath baby showers.

You have been "told" what to buy? Jesus wept. Don't think I'd be attending out of principle.

HazleNutt Mon 10-Nov-14 15:59:35

No, I would not buy her something else, if she specifically asked for clothing. I'd just get clothing in bigger sizes, in case everybody buys her newborn stuff.

Careful with certain season clothing though - I have a summer-baby and got a gorgeous snowsuit in a 6-month size as a gift when he was born. Unfortunately he turned out to be a 95th percentile for height and there was no chance squeezing him into that when winter came. So I'd get something like vests, pyjamas etc that can be worn at all seasons.

Waltermittythesequel Mon 10-Nov-14 16:04:52

You have been "told" what to buy? Jesus wept. Don't think I'd be attending out of principle

Really?

I've never had one thank fuck but I've been to one. I wouldn't dream of turning up without a present, nor would anyone else I know turn up without a present so requesting clothes is fine IMO.

If she was requesting diamond dummies from Tiffany's or something you'd have a point.

SomeSortOfDeliciousBiscuit Mon 10-Nov-14 16:06:39

I think it's quite rude to specify 'buy me this and only this' but at the same time, she knows what she wants and I admire that. You would definitely be unreasonable and quite rude to ignore it.

Maybe she wants the joy of shopping for all the other bits and pieces? Maybe she has firm ideas of what she wants? She said clothes, so get clothes.

She might not have told anyone to buy her clothes, that's an assumption. It may be that someone said to her "I'd like to buy you a gift, is there anything you'd particularly like?" and she said "no need to buy anything but if you would like to I'd prefer clothes please". For all we know.

Flingmoo Mon 10-Nov-14 16:22:17

Hmm, in that case I'll definitely get her an item of clothing but possibly something else as a little bonus gift, take it or leave it xD Not nipple cream, although it's tempting for someone who is planning on BFing... grin

It wasn't specified that it has to be baby clothing - maybe I should get her some ginormous yoga pants for postnatal comfort? Teehee.

HazleNutt That's the same problem we had but in reverse, our 5mo Spring/Summer baby was small so he's only just in the 3-6 month summer clothes we were given, but way too small for the 6-9 winter clothes we were expecting him to be in soon! But yeah, you can't go wrong with sleepsuits.

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