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petty definances

(16 Posts)
icanhaveadarksideifyouwantmeto Thu 06-Nov-14 21:07:45

i have just asked the whole family to shut the two doors. i asked them nicely about 47 times before i got snappy.

(im sitting on the floor and its a pain in the arse to keep getting up and shutting doors when some one has just breezed through and dont have the consideration to shut the door behind them.

SO DH stands up, opens the door - allowing an artic gale to blow in from the kitchen, and picks up his drink and drinks it - whilst holding the door open.

I said...come on! will you Please keep the door shut?
he said .... but im going through it
I said... but you arent. you are standing there with the door open.

SO he goes into the kitchen to put his glass away..... AND LEAVES THE FUCKIN DOOR OPEN!

he is being so fucking petty.....

so i shouted ... oh yeah thats mature......[realises the irony]

and he has gone to bed in a huff!

AIBU or was he?

DoJo Thu 06-Nov-14 21:18:19

If you want petty, you should hear my hilarious comment on typo in your title!
Seriously though - why is he being such a dick about it?! It's one thing to forget, or even to half remember whilst drinking a drink, but why not just apologise and close the door?! Can you get yourself good and cold then get into bed and put your feet on his warmest parts?!

icanhaveadarksideifyouwantmeto Thu 06-Nov-14 21:21:08

what did i do with the title?

it does get nice and cosy if they keep the doors shut.

i dunno why he is being an arse... but he was, wasnt he?

DoJo Thu 06-Nov-14 21:27:08

Just the idea of 'definancing' - sounds like you are going to separate your joint bank account to teach him a lesson! grin

He was definitely being an arse - it's bad enough having to remind kids to do things over and over again, but he should be on your side and making an effort to set an example, not behaving worse than anyone else in the house. Does he usually go to bed this early or can you console yourself that he is now stuck up there in a huff wishing he hadn't been such a nob about the door?

icanhaveadarksideifyouwantmeto Thu 06-Nov-14 21:33:38

no he works at stupid oclock in the morning, so its usual.

i see what i did! how do you spell it then?

ClawHandsIfYouBelieveInFreaks Thu 06-Nov-14 22:24:57

YABU about doors. I feel strongly that if you want them shut, you shut them. I find the constant opening and closing of doors hugely irritating so I leave them open.

My DH is like you. He'll say "Shut the door" and I just say nope!

AesSedai Thu 06-Nov-14 22:26:30

It's "defiance" ican. So.......petty defiances.

ArgyMargy Thu 06-Nov-14 22:29:05

Arctic not artic.

WooWooOwl Thu 06-Nov-14 22:30:54

It is a pain in the arse to live with someone that constantly demands that doors be shut so you have to think about it for every tiny thing you do around the house that involves being in more than one room.

It is a pain in the arse to be sitting comfortably and then be made to feel cold by someone who never gets that cold when they could prevent themselves from making you feel cold quite easily.

You are just different people that do things differently. Neither of you are right or wrong, so just be nice about it. It's really not worth a shouting match and going to bed on a row over.

Vitalstatistix Thu 06-Nov-14 22:32:20

swishing doors open and shut creates just as much draft.

Rather than constant grumps which is fun for nobody, it would be better to find the source of the draft and eliminate it.

Our house is SO much warmer since we got door curtains and lined curtains for all the windows. Seriously cannot believe the difference it has made!

I'd really recommend it.

Jolleigh Thu 06-Nov-14 22:49:30

I'm a door-open kind of person myself, other than DD's bedroom while she's asleep. But I'm a single mum so there's nobody here for me to irritate with it. I feel quite confined when I'm shut in a room. You're both being a bit U for arguing over it as it's just one of those differences but neither of you is being U for preferring one way to the other.

DoJo Fri 07-Nov-14 00:09:43

However you feel about doors though, surely you say 'actually I prefer it open - can we get rid of the draught instead of having it closed all the time' is a much better way to approach it than deliberately doing something that you know will wind up the person you are supposed to love? If the whole situation were about anything else, her husband's reaction would have been just as infuriating.

wobblyweebles Fri 07-Nov-14 01:25:51

Yeah he was being a dick.

You should steal the duvet tonight. If possible also open the window on his side of the bed.

Jolleigh Fri 07-Nov-14 07:23:33

Yep, he was definitely being a dick with the way he went about it. My family is packed full of wind up merchants though so I personally wouldn't have expected any less despite it being a perfectly reasonable request smile. Hope it's blown over this morning OP.

R4roger Fri 07-Nov-14 07:26:08

i sit in the kitchen with my puppy and my mantra to people who come in, is close the door, aargh. When DH closes it, but not properly so puppy can get out, and get out she will and i have to go after her.

gamerchick Fri 07-Nov-14 07:33:19

Get a spring that attaches to the door to close it.

Sometimes you can't eliminate a draught, there are vents all over the place.

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