On saturday at around 5, a man in his late 60's-early 70's was shouting over to me. Now I have severe anxiety that was way up - I was out on my own which I don't normally do. He was shouting "excuse me!, Excuse me!" I ignored as I would with anyone, until he said "can you help me please?"
I asked what was the matter and he asked me to take him to the corner shop, which was down a long road back the way I came and I had to go meet MIL. I said I can't as I have to be somewhere. He then asked me if I could take him across the road. I couldn't say no. He had a walking stick, so I'd expect when I gave him my arm for stability, he would have put pressure on my arm. Anyway, we got across the road to a house directly opposite. He tried to get me into the garden and grasped hold of my sleeve and said "just come to the door a sec love"
I said no... no... nononono.... NO and yanked my arm away.
I spoke to a friend of MIL's who uses walking sticks and said he would have put pressure on my arm if he needed my help, as sticks don't help your balance and you can't distribute your weight if you need a stick. He didn't need my help and was probably a ruse.
Now, we phoned the police and I was a bit shaken. they came out yesterday, a pcso mind, and they said unless I was touched innapropriately, they can't arrest him but they can look into it.
I thought, what if he'd have grabbed me and I'd have been grabbed from in the house?
I am 4'11 and to be fair, I don't look any older than 14 without makeup on, and with joggers on.
He probably thought I was years younger than I actually am.
What will they do about it? I mean, I have no idea if he's tried to do this before, but I've heard that they use old men who need help and children who have lost their mummies as ruses to abduct young girls, which I'm not, but I can get away with looking like one unfortunately.
I'm still a bit shaken from it. It could have been nothing.
God this long, sorry.
AIBU?
to ask what the police can actually do about this?
Espii · 03/11/2014 14:29
thurlow aye... Now I can see how silly it sounds! 
I really do read into a lot of things. I'm getting nightmares and waking up crying and not being able to speak sometimes. I usually ignore strangers because I really do think everyone's out to hurt everyone (thanks to dear mum... and crimewatch. "never talk to strangers!" yeah... no wonder.)
I disagree with the walking stick for support not balance. I know several elderly people who use them for balance. And have told one off who turns hers upside down and uses the hook to pick plant stems up from the ground so she can trim them with the rather evil looking Secateurs in her other hand 
Also I would have thought if he wanted to abduct you then shouting at length across the road was a pretty stupid way of going about it. Very noticable.
you're all right, my heads in bits and i'm just still a bit confused myself why he wanted me to take him to the door of another house! and ask for my help when he walked with no difficulty! I'm just still a bit 
about it but thats because I am reading too much into it!
Sorry you were so frightened, can't have been very nice 
.
The police can't really do anything in this situation because nothing happened. It sounds like he was fairly unsteady and a bit confused and just wanted a hand. I can see how you would be worried though if you have anxiety issues. My grandad (who passed away a few weeks back) had a stick but didn't lean heavily on it and wouldn't have leant heavily on a helper. It was more for the feeling of security and the occasional wobbles off balance.
Hope you are okay now.
but she said that he would have put pressure on my arm to stablize himself, he didn't need that stability, I saw him walk up steps in front of his house and didn't need help walking across the road as he was walking without struggle! didn't need me thats why i'm why he asked me to do that and said "come to the door of this house love"
Maybe its other people...
"Maybe he shouted over to let the other person know in the house"
this is why I don't go out -.- haha!
thetitwank at your name ahaha thank you
I don't have a lot of experience with elderly people at all, there aren't any in my family as they've passed away years ago. I had no idea. and didn't until now.
A lot of older people can walk steadily with a stick, but feel safer with a helping hand over the road where you have to move fairly swiftly because of traffic/potential traffic coming up. My friend with MS has a stick which she doesn't necessarily always need but feels better with. She occasionally asks for an arm across a road if she is tired or worried about it being a fast road.
Try to stop over thinking this
OP I think you're getting some unfair comments. I suffer from anxiety too and this would bother me, but sadly I can't tell you if we're being reasonable or if it is anxiety related!
You were right to voice concerns to the police, and if there's anything untoward going on it will most likely have been flagged up already. Either way there is nothing more for you to do.
Look after yourself and try to do some things that relax you. You are safe 
Oh you poor thing OP - you do sound anxious. Could you manage to get back to the person who offered the CBT and ask if other hours are available? Or talk to your boss about being able to have time off
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