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to think there's just never enough hours in the day? anyone else feel similarly?

(29 Posts)
toomuchtodoneverenoughtime Wed 29-Oct-14 20:56:27

I work ft, long-ish commute (bit over an hour each way). My life just feels like an endless treadmill...get up at 6ish, go to gym, then to work. Am there til 6-7, then home. Make myself dinner (normally a sandwich or beans on toast etc unless my teen DC haven't eaten in which case I try and make something more substantial for them) chat to DC. Put some washing on, flop in front of tv, am normally ready for bed by 10.30.

Weekends are busy too. Eow I spend the weekend at my bf (not sure he's quite able to be called DP yet), on the weekends I am at home it's gym/housework/laundry/stuff with DC on Sat, Suns more of the same til late afternoon when I go up to bf's house.

I just never seem to have any time. I rarely get a lunch hour as work is so busy, if I do it's spent running urgent errands. I've got loads of jobs I need to do at home but I can never get round to them. I thought once my DC were older I'd have more time (somehow!) but if anything I have less.

Is it just me? How do you make more time? I can't change my job or commute anytime soon, is there anything else I can do though?

Ikeameatballs Wed 29-Oct-14 21:02:30

I feel the same.

I was near to tears at work today because I have so much to do and no time to do it. My children are primary school age and their dad never has them overnight and they can't be left alone....I'm really struggling at the moment. Going to book a day off work when they get back to school and have a massage to de-stress.

toomuchtodoneverenoughtime Wed 29-Oct-14 21:08:36

Ah, Ikea I feel bad for moaning now! My DC go to their dad or friends eow, and are old enough to leave on their own a fair amount of time (though I wouldn't leave them both on their
own overnight yet).

I wouldn't mind a massage tbh, although I squandered most of my annual leave over the summer and have to save the rest for Xmas...

Greengrow Wed 29-Oct-14 21:17:11

It gets easier as children get older.
You could ditch the morning gym and the boyfriend which would free up loads of time. It's all about choices really.

googlenut Wed 29-Oct-14 21:20:53

Do you have to go to the gym everyday? It probably isn't as productive as maybe doing 3-4 sessions a week with a personalised session at the gym. That would free up some time.

googlenut Wed 29-Oct-14 21:21:16

Cross posted!

toomuchtodoneverenoughtime Wed 29-Oct-14 21:24:25

I need the gym for weight/health reasons, I was quite overweight until a couple of years ago so I think it's important to keep going and make time for it somehow.

My bf makes me incredibly happy (aside from being so busy I am hugely happier than before I met him) so dumping him really isn't an option.

toomuchtodoneverenoughtime Wed 29-Oct-14 21:30:30

I can only go to the gym for 30-40 mins in the morning, I cant stay longer as I wouldn't be able to get to work in time. I did try going in the evenings but was too shattered after work and kept skipping sessions. Should add my gym is the most basic, low budget kind, so no-one to provide any personalised advice or anything!

BlinkAndMiss Wed 29-Oct-14 21:48:13

I feel the same but easing your post makes me think you need a shake up of your routine rather than a total,change. You seem to have a mix of work/family/me-time but I think when it's done on such a routine basis it can all start to feel like it's a chore.

I'd start with changing your gym routine - go once a week before work and then shake up the rest of your exercise time. Take classes instead of going to the same gym all the time, add a swim after work instead or a long walk or a jog. You could even do these things before work (maybe not swimming if you're short on time). What about horse riding on a weekend? You probably feel tired and skip the gym because it's the same place, day in day out.

Then think about your evenings - I organise my time so that some things become treats to look forward to. So I set aside a Wednesday night to do my nails, Thursday I do a night class with a friend, Monday I do my ironing etc.

The things we can't change, like work, are things we have to make the best of but the things we chose to have in our lives should enhance our lives.

toomuchtodoneverenoughtime Thu 30-Oct-14 08:07:28

I don't swim so that's not a possibility unfortunately.

I've tried classes at the nearest sports centre (my gym doesn't offer classes) previously however the times never seemed to work, I couldn't be sure of getting to the ones starting at 7, and the later ones at 8.30 meant I didn't get home til 10. I will look again to see if the times have changed. I do find generally I am too tired to face doing anything much in the evenings by the time I get home.

toomuchtodoneverenoughtime Thu 30-Oct-14 17:47:57

Today I made a special effort to leave on time (for once) and the traffic is so bad I'm almost tempted to get out and walk!

MonsoonInBelize Thu 30-Oct-14 17:53:10

Why on earth would the OP want to ditch her BF Greengrow hmm.

Lucy61 Thu 30-Oct-14 17:56:58

Ditch the bf ?! But unfair, don't you think shock

Lucy61 Thu 30-Oct-14 17:57:17

Bit not but

Letitbee Thu 30-Oct-14 18:53:50

Exercise with the BF at the weekend find something that works for you both - walking, jogging etc - mix it up if you can. Look into HITT to reduce need for gym everyday - walk at lunch time when you don't go to the gym.
Would it be possible to work from home one day a week ?
could you compress your work week into 4 days occasionally as well ?
Get a personal trainer for a short course to give you ways to exercise to the max in the min time.
What do you do in the car on the commute ? Audio books can make a huge difference.
Do you kids help out with household chores enough ?

MissMogwi Thu 30-Oct-14 19:04:59

You're not alone OP. Most of my friends feel like this some most of the time, and I know I do Mon to Friday.

It's the constantly chasing your tail scenario that does for me. Although some of it is my own fault as my DP does his fair share and more, but as I was a LP for a long time, I have struggled to give some control over. If that makes sense. confused

Anyway, I don't know what the answer is other than to let some jobs/chores slide or delegate them to others.

Tryharder Thu 30-Oct-14 19:17:14

I feel like this. I am run ragged most if the time - FT job, work shifts, unending housework, 3 primary school age children....

I thrive on busy-ness but often feel very stressed and it can't be good for my health.

toomuchtodoneverenoughtime Thu 30-Oct-14 19:24:55

I'm asking about flex working, waiting for our HR dept to get back to me, but I think from speaking to colleagues they won't let me compress my hours only reduce them (which I can't afford to do right now). Home working isn't allowed due to the nature of the work we do.

Bf and I do go for walks but it's more of a stroll than the 7-8k max gradient stuff I do in the gym, so I never feel it's doing me any good really. Which I silly because rationally I know it must be of some benefit.

I have thought of a personal trainer, and a cleaner (which would be amazing) but I just don't have the cash unless I manage to negotiate a major pay rise in my end of year appraisal...

I can relate to the LP thing too. My bf does help, but I rarely ask him, I fact I actively discourage him from doing anything. Partly because he has a house of his own and lots he needs to do, and because I don't want our relationship to become all about everyday chores. And because I feel I should be able to do everything.

PumpkinPie2013 Thu 30-Oct-14 19:36:34

I sympathise - I feel the same and totally over loaded at the moment sad

I only have one ds but he's only 11 months so obviously needs lots of time and attention. Me and DH both work full time.

I literally feel like I never stop! Trying to keep up with work, house work, laundry and spend time with ds!

I don't have a solution unfortunately - I ended up seeing my GP last week because of stress.

Trying to relax a bit each day and trying to learn to say 'no' more but not easy!

MrsPiggie Thu 30-Oct-14 19:46:37

I can sympathise, toomuch... I get half an hour to myself in the evening which is spent reading in the bath. It's bliss.. the rest of the time is just living in a whirlwind. I could do with 26 hours in a day, that would be a reasonable length.

toomuchtodoneverenoughtime Thu 30-Oct-14 20:29:29

A 26 hour day would certainly help. Or more money. Or both

Lasttimebaby Thu 30-Oct-14 20:40:33

Constantly feel like this. I have so much to do this eve still, tidy kitchen, wash grill, do some work that I get paid extra for which I have fallen behind on and a ton of ironing. Am wrecked tired after a long day and dh had equally long day and is heading out now to do a job for his mum. However if I don't tackle kitchen and ironing now I won't get on top of stuff for weekend.

Permanentlyexhausted Thu 30-Oct-14 21:00:37

I can sympathise OP, I feel just the same.

FT job, long commute by car, 2 primary age children, a Brownie unit to run.

Like Tryharder I do thrive on being busy but all to often these days it tips over into stress.

JustSayNoNoNo Thu 30-Oct-14 22:57:36

I need an extra day every week. Two would be better: one for work and one for the weekend. I no longer have DCs at home, so now I spend too much time at work, including 7-10 hours unpaid overtime each week, and am still overwhelmed, with too much to do. I have no idea how to resolve this.

antimatter Thu 30-Oct-14 23:15:32

I ditched ironing many years ago.
This week I took off and instead of going to Italy spent cash on doing up floor in the sitting room. Everything had to disappear from there for my builder to carry on his work. I made my kids to help me emptying it and today we started putting some stuff in.

Are your DC's helping you at all?
Mine are 15 and 17 and I decided they have to cook something once a week each and help with cleaning as I am sick and tired of doing everything myself - to them I am selling it as their prep for Uni grin

I am up at 4 am and back home by 4 pm. I should be in bed by 9 pm every day or I am to tired to think next day (long and fast commute both ways). I joined our local council gym/swimming this week because I feel I am vey unfit. I started walking more when we got our dog over 2 years ago but need to build core strength as I have none sad which was apparent when we did kayaking few weeks ago - they had to drag me out of a kayak at the end of our session! I am overweight and unfit.

I sympathise with you and know that fitness is something we shouldn't compromise on.

I stopped watching tv altogether few years ago but I feel I am loosing on some interesting programs so need to be sensible about it too.

I know I sometimes spend too much time on my phone browsing the net so feel that I need to control that too.

I also made myself promise to take 60 min lunch break and most days go for a walk. That helps a lot - no local shops near by but walk by the river listening to my audiobook.

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