I have 3 DC's. 4, 2 and 1. 4 year old is starting school next week (woohoo). I have been back at work 3 months. The most cost effective childcare for us is to have a nanny. I found a lovely girl through childcare.co.uk. She was previously working in a nursery as a room leader and wanted to be a nanny. She lived very local to us and it was all perfect. Both DH and i work in Central London and live out in the Counties. Commute is 90 min door to door. DH is lucky enough to be able to either start a bit later (10am) or work from home.
2 months ago our nanny had a catastrophic break up with her partner. She left their flat and moved back into her parents in North London and has been driving down to us every morning. We need her to start at 7.30 as i have to catch my train and DH is often oncall from 7am and has limited capacity to look after the children. She is late almost every day by at least 30 minutes.
I know she is trying very hard to get to us on time and it is traffic that is causing the problem but i still have to leave at 7.30 and quite often DH is left trying to manage a 3 hungry grumpy kids and an urgent work call which is what happened this morning.
Nanny has no real plan to move back to the local area. she is in a bit of a financial pickle as she was paying a very low sum for rent when she was living with her partner and now has commitments which eat up her salary and I cant pay her more. She has stopped taking the kids out as she doesn't have the petrol. I have offered to advance her mileage but she refused.
Other than the lateness issue i dont have a problem with her care for the kids. She is enthusiastic and willing. She needs a bit of guidance on how to structure her week with the kids but i think that is only to be expected with hiring someone who lacks actual nanny experience.
This morning she was an hour late. I stayed as long as i could but had to leave. Poor DH had a work emergency and had to try and deal with it and feed a hungry 1 year old and look after a 2 and 4 year old (thank god for TV).
Nanny knows there is a problem and i think she must be looking for a new job up in London. Because of the lateness we have extended her probation period from 3 to 6 months and she acknowledged that it was a problem. I kind of feel like i am waiting for the other shoe to drop, for her to hand in her notice and i think the current situation is untenable for both of us.
I am very tempted to not wait for her to find something else and just start interviewing replacement nannies now. I feel like we need security in our childcare and we dont have that now.
but i feel awful even considering doing that. I dont want to put her out of work. She is a lovely young woman who has really pulled herself up by her bootstraps. I hate the idea of replacing her unwillingly.
I need to grow a backbone and just do it dont I?
Sorry this turned abit epic. Thank you for reading.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
AIBU regarding Nanny - help me find a backbone
30 replies
Loudandtothepoint · 03/09/2014 16:36
OP posts:
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.