Well, ok, legally it was. I undestand why but it just feels so so wrong to call it that.
Three weeks ago I was pregnant with our much longed for second baby, expected at Christmas. We were also on a big family holiday, the first we'd had in three years. Both sets of grandparents, us, dsd and dd.
Then half way through the holiday I started bleeding. No big deal, I've bled during every pregnancy, it's almost normal for me. Then the pains started. And they got worse and worse.
A few hours later I was rushed to a&e. After six more hours of labour I gave birth to our son. He had passed away shortly before delivery. After that I had to have an operation to remove my placenta, I had a haemorrhage and my blood pressure dropped to 70/25.
Everyone has been very supportive. The medical staff were fantastic.
But I just can't help it. Every time someone mentions the word miscarriage I want to scream, hit. I don't obviously. That just isn't the right word to describe what happened.
I'm not trying to take away from the pain of an early miscarriage. I've had five, they were awful. But what happened three weeks ago was nothing like those, so much worse.
Trying to hold it together but whenever someone says that word I fall to pieces afterwards all over again.
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It wasn't a bloody miscarriage.
138 replies
SlicedAndDiced · 02/09/2014 16:52
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