Bloody teenagers(13 Posts)
Ok, my first venture into aibu so may regret this when it isn't three am but I'm so pissed off right now.
I will say
normally I love my dss to bits and I've been in his life for 12 years and his mum is a good friend of mine but here goes.
Dss is 16 and goes to college next week. His gf lives quite close to us and his mums is about 5 miles away. He prefers to stay at ours as it means he can leave the gf's about fifteen precious mins later and still make it in for around 10.
Sundays are normally his mums night, he asks if he can stay here, no problem but we tell him not to be on Xbox all night keeping us awake, were up at 6 and still have a non sleeping through 18 month old. We go to bed around 10 leaving him to do whatever down stairs. Four times hes woken us by shouting/swearing at his mates on the Xbox through online. . I tell him three times at 11,12 and 1 to be quiet. At two am dh goes down and really has a go, telling him to get off Xbox. Argument then creates waking 18 month old.
Aibu to say no Internet after 10pm on our work nights. He will go nuts but I'm so fed up of it.
Other thing this bugging me, through normal conversation with dss mum this eve, found out she's working away all week. Dss will now assume (and dss mum) that he's fine to stay here. If it was planned no issue, but I've shopped for food for the week taking into account him staying three times not five or six. I just find it a bit rude that no one bothers to check so would ibu to say nope, back to your mums (his step dad is there).
Final gripe, his bike tyre is flat, dh asked him to pick up puncture repair kit in town ( the one he's near every single day as his gf lives next to it) he hasn't and this meas he can't bike back to his mums, aibu to say tough luck, pick up a repair kit today otherwise you walk back.
I'm so grumpy right now. And have to be up in less than three hours. Also any tips for managing teenagers that just threaten to move in/stay with gf if we carry out number one of removing Internet much appreciated.
Sounds like a variation on teenage behaviour. Not much I can suggest other than a 10pm curfew on Xbox, and a bucket of sympathy. I, too, have one in the house.
Roll on the start of term. Earlier bedtimes, and a bit more 'space' for everyone.
Totally not unreasonable. And it's not as if you didn't ask him, three bloody times, not to make a racket.
The bike thing is also not unreasonable but will look a bit petty in the context.
In the whole I think a sit down talk saying "sort it out you're supposed to be a grown up we all help each other here and that means thinking things through (buy your kit before you need it) and talking about stuff (wanting to stay for a week)."
Will the stepfather back you up with an unsympathetic "what do you expect, waking people up?" type attitude?
My dc are both under 3 but we did have a teenager staying with us for 6 months last year. We had a very simple rule that if he woke me up I would disable the internet. He would know he had woken me up because the internet would stop working. I could disable it from my phone which was very handy!
So I don't think yabu.
The other things are a bit more minor and I suspect you're feeling more cross about them because you are sleep deprived...
^That. Go into the router and find the MAC for the Xbox. There should be a rules table where you can set access permissions.
God how annoying id just say no internet on a work college night past whatever time you say. My own 16yr old is stiil in school she has to be in her room for 10ish or she would watch tv loudly all night
Not unreasonable no - he's abused his privileges. Maybe time limit on it eg just for the next two weeks/he can win it back if you don't want to go nuclear on it?
And yes, they should have asked rather than assumed. I would be wanting to nip that one in the bud personally.
I don't let my 16 on his Xbox during the week and the internet is disabled when we go to bed. He briefly dabbled in dodgy chat stuff so it is partly to discourage that but he has no willpower with online gaming, leaving a game part way through is very frowned upon by the other players and feels a bit like leaving a party in full swing so I have to be tough for him.
I've got 2 teens. I'd suggest digging a big hole and hiding yourself in it until they are 25!
Tell him that he needs to get himself a pair of headphones that has the mic built in that feed his own voice back into his ear when he speaks and after x'oclock he uses them or you'll just restrict the times that xbox can access the internet via the router settings.
or calmly walk in with a hammer and destroy it, you'd never need to ask twice in future.
there was a mum on here once that got so cross with her teenage son, she threw his play station out of the loft conversion window!!!
I worship her!
Dsd used to be a pain for waking us up at silly o'clock by chatting to her friends.
We put a timer on the router and it worked a charm!
I get up at 6 and so I take the router to bed with me!!!
DSS is going back to college soon so he shouldn't really be staying up so late then anyway, you are doing him a big favour
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