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to cause some kind of 'freak' catastrophe. . **very lighthearted**

(44 Posts)
paddleduck Mon 25-Aug-14 12:36:07

In DH'S wardrobe?

I jest, ofc. But I simply don't know how else he's ever going to give up dressing like teenager.

He is 33 next week and his wardrobe includes items such as: Burberry (the original check design) long sleeve shirts in various colours. White jeans (he doesn't understand that you can't wear black undies with them either!) and 'Yankee' hats and a few camouflage print items.. oh and a tracksuit that makes him look like a life sized smurf. He loves his clothes- his wardrobe is kept immaculate. I would never ever say anything to him about how he looks cos that would be mean.. but I can't help but secretly wish he'd dress better to my taste .. wibu to accidentally trip with an open tin of paint/start collecting moths and release them in there/ put bleach in the washing machine instead of detergent?

Please share your husbands treasured clothes that you hate and make me feel a bit better!

Numanoid Mon 25-Aug-14 12:43:09

YANBU grin Apart from the camouflage!

Stratter5 Mon 25-Aug-14 12:48:45


XH bought the most horrendous ^orange* sweater once; DDs and I hated it, and made it our mission to destroy it.

It was indestructible. I boil washed it, thinking it would come out the size of a postage stamp. It didn't, it grew, and he embraced it's new found bagginess. We chucked bleach in the washing machine, nothing happened. I rubbed dog food in it, hoping for a sweater centred dog mauling, it survived.

In the end, we were saved from it's orange hideousness by a massive moth attack. Lovely, lovely clothes moths.

Vitalstatistix Mon 25-Aug-14 13:00:04

Just make sure you know the history of any item.

I once did something awful, really really awful.

My husband has the worst taste in clothes, but his jumpers were just so far beyond hideous it's like hideous was a tiny spot on the horizon that his jumpers could barely see. It is why I buy his clothes now. There is a strong probability that I am a control freak, but he knew this when he married me so he has nobody to blame but himself. wink

anyway, this particular jumper was awardwinningly awful. If you sat down and tried to create the most horrible jumper in the world, you wouldn't even get close. It was like the bastard child of a 1970s golf jumper and something vivienne westwood created while on acid.

So I 'lost' it. I know, I know. I am horrible, right? control freak. evil. if you're feeling bored this fine bank holiday morning you can chuck a few insults my way grin

It gets worse. When he noticed it was gone, he asked had I seen it. I of course said no.

It turned out this jumper had belonged to his beloved late brother.

I still feel like a total and complete sack of shit.

16 years and I haven't confessed.

Tikimon Mon 25-Aug-14 13:04:12

There is a strong probability that I am a control freak, but he knew this when he married me so he has nobody to blame but himself.

I wonder how many abusers say that... That's a really horrible story Vital. angry

Yes, there's clothes that I hate of DH's but they're his. I just sort of put them on the bottom of the stack or in the back of the closet and hope he finds the ones in immediate site more appealing.

NormHonal Mon 25-Aug-14 13:06:24

My DH loves a Hawaiian shirt, two sizes too big for him. They make him look enormous (he isn't).

I have told him, many times!

Vitalstatistix Mon 25-Aug-14 13:08:38

Yes, it is. I agree with you. It was awful. 16 years and I still, like I said, feel like a total sack of shit and have been unable to confess it to him. It was awful, that moment when he said it. My stomach just went into my boots. I was so preoccupied with my hatred of a bloody jumper that I didn't think of anything else. It was a truly truly horrible jumper but it meant the world to him and I still feel guilty.

paddleduck Mon 25-Aug-14 13:23:35

Normhonal- ohhhhhh, hawaiian shirts are bad !

Vital, that is awful! You must feel terrible! You weren't to know. Plenty of mn'ers have admitted to loosing or destroying secretly hated items of clothing, if you'd known you wouldn't have done it.

Stratter5 Mon 25-Aug-14 13:27:02

Jesus, Tikimon twist the knife, why don't you.

Vitalstatistix Mon 25-Aug-14 13:29:34

No, I wouldn't. Not in a million years. But it still makes my chest hurt when I think of it.

Anyway, I only told it to caution you and show you that something that you think is the most hideous thing on the planet - and I tried to describe just how hideous! - can be something loved and cherished and so important.

my god, it was a bloody horrible jumper and it made him look like a twat but I wish I could get it back.

anyway, this is your thread not mine grin

don't chuck his stuff out. grin

go shopping with him or something and tell him how gorgeous he looks in stuff.

picnicbasketcase Mon 25-Aug-14 13:29:47

Vital sad How awful, but you didn't know. It's a shame that it's gone but you can't beat yourself up about it forever. My DH suspects that I threw away a godawful tshirt that he loved when I actually didn't, I have no idea where it went. I was considering hiding it somewhere but never went through with it, so that was weird.

snice Mon 25-Aug-14 13:30:40

DP has a jacket I hate-it lives permanently in the bottom of the bathroom laundry basket so he can't wear it but if he asks w here it is I can produce it.
Out of sight, out of mind.

Vitalstatistix Mon 25-Aug-14 13:32:03

grin oh stratters (good to see you back btw! I noticed you but never seem to find myself on the same thread at the same time) it's fine. I deserve it.

In a weird sort of way, I like it. It's like my deserved punishment that I need to have. I deserve to have it for what I did.

I am officially a freak grin

paddleduck Mon 25-Aug-14 13:37:03

Picnic- it was so bad it destroyed itself grin

limitedperiodonly Mon 25-Aug-14 13:38:59

I'm torn OP. So many women think their taste in clothes is better than men's when, in fact, both are equally dodgy, but in different ways.

DH is Beau Brummel whereas left to my own devices I am sartorially-challenged and colour-blind. And to the idea that gay men are naturally stylish, I offer you Elton John.

However, your DH sounds like a case for intervention. Moths won't help. They may turn up their fussy little proboscises at his clothes.

But in the true spirit of lighthearted fairness you should lay your wardrobe bare. So what's your idea of good taste?

paddleduck Mon 25-Aug-14 13:49:03

I can confirm my own wardrobe is boring - I stick to jeans, plain tops and simply accessorise with jewellery and shoes to dress it up a bit.

I think the issue is he hasn't changed shape much over the years and as work requires a uniform, all his clothes are pristine and have been kept- I don't so my wardrobe has adapted over time. I do wish he'd see sense though.

He wore a red and cream 'American style baseball' jacket (think glee) to dinner last night.

Coffeethrowtrampbitch Mon 25-Aug-14 13:56:36

Dh once left a screwdriver in his jeans pocket which utterly destroyed all of my work clothes which were shredded in the machine. None of his which were in the same wash were damaged at all.

I'm just saying op, accidents happen smile

BlackeyedSusan Mon 25-Aug-14 14:00:43

my friend was once rained on by paint. it leaked through the ceiling from the attic.

BlackeyedSusan Mon 25-Aug-14 14:01:23

oh dear it seems I may have added this to the wrong thread. wink

<innocent whistling>

honeysucklejasmine Mon 25-Aug-14 14:26:17

My DH had a coat I called "pervert flasher mac". (so did his brothers.) He threw it away as I refused to let him wear it.

And to think, he wore it to our first date! grin

He also needs to jumpers, as I refuse to let him wear his fathers, significantly too large, cast offs. Men!

FunkyBoldRibena Mon 25-Aug-14 14:35:24

Oh yes - with you on this one. My OH has a habit of going shopping when I am busy at weekends and coming back with monstrosities. Last time it was what I call his Walt jacket. One of those hideous blouson jackets. In blue.

My eyes...

I don't let him wear it when he comes out with me.

TheHorseHasBolted Mon 25-Aug-14 14:39:07

Would you like it if he tried to interfere in your choice of clothes?

I know you were joking but I do genuinely think it's none of either partner's business what the other one chooses to wear. There are no absolutes of what is ugly and what isn't, people just have different tastes. It drives me up the wall when my husband asks me what he should wear - I say I wouldn't want him dictating what I wear so I'm not going to dictate to him. He's in his 40s so he should have some idea of his own style by now.

paddleduck Mon 25-Aug-14 14:54:10

Thehorse- perhaps you missed the bit where I said I never ever say anything.

This is an entirely lighthearted thread to relieve the frustrations I secretly harbour. I just wanted a fun thread on a rainy Monday.

Trills Mon 25-Aug-14 14:59:28

XDP claimed that he didn't like dressing gowns because they encouraged you to hang around not dressed.

So instead he would hang around not dressed in boxers and a minging fleece. (not dirty, just old and bobbly and with a hole in the armpit).

I converted him by buying him a fleece dressing gown with a hood - the hood made it like a boxer's dressing gown thing.

Minging fleece was reserved only for doing gardening, and always worn with trousers.

MaccaPaccaismyNemesis Mon 25-Aug-14 15:01:15

My DH dresses like he did when he was in school. He proudly proclaims that his REM t-shirt from 1995 still fits. He looks like a right mess. Anything particularly grotty gets hidden at the back of DSs wardrobe!

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